A/N: I haven't written anything for Lost since Charlotte died. And Daniel's dead too. I'm sad. For the record, umm, the finale was sick nasty, and Suliet is my second favorite pairing of all time. The first being Charladay. Obviously. Anyway, this fic was written for a challenge at The Domain, which is the number one General forum right now.
Prompt: "Droit devant soi on ne peut pas aller bien loin." Roughly translated, it means "Straight ahead, one cannot go very far."
Disclaimer: I don't own anything, so stop asking. Please.
"I love you baby
Won't you bring
All the flowers you
Find out in the garden
Don't tell me the truth
That your heart has hardened
But you don't want me anymore
How can it be
Look what you've done to me"~ The Garden by Mirah
Juliet saw the way he looked at her. And it stung like a bitch. Three years had passed, and she had truly fallen in love with Sawyer. She often hoped that Sawyer loved her too, but sadly, she had deluded herself into thinking that he did. Until she saw him look at Kate, and she sighed, realizing that Jack's plan was all she had to keep her going. Breaking up their fight, she decided, was one of the best things she had ever done.
"Wait, Juliet, we've got to talk about this!" Sawyer exclaimed to her, as Jack stalked away. She didn't want to talk about it with him. She knew that if she did, her emotions would spill over and explode. And she would say hurtful things to him, and that was the last thing she wanted to do.
Their conversation was filled with short quips on her end, and confusion on his end. She hated the look in his eyes, and she hated herself for making him feel this way. "I changed my mind when I saw you look at her," she spat it out before she could hold it back. Part of her wanted to apologize immediately, and have her hold him. The other part of her liked seeing the confusion and hurt in his eyes, and the latter part prevailed.
"I don't care who I looked at. I'm with you," he said to her gently. For a moment, Juliet wanted to believe him. She wanted to believe in him so badly, it hurt. But she knew, no matter what he told her, part of him would still love Kate and she didn't want to make him unhappy. For three years, he had been nothing short of a source of light and love for her.
"And you would stay with me forever if I let you, and that is why I will always love you." If nothing else, she could safely say that she spoke the truth with every bit of conviction that she had in her. Still, it took an equal amount of strength not to cry as she spoke. Letting go of Sawyer was probably the hardest thing she had ever done. When her husband had been hit by a bus, there was a sense of relief. Letting go of Sawyer? There was a heavy load in her heart, and she never wanted to feel anything like it again.
"You don't-" Sawyer said hoarsely, as if he were trying not to cry as well.
"What we had, it was just for a little while, and just because we love each other, it doesn't mean that we're meant to be together. I mean, maybe we were never supposed to be together. So if Jack can make it that--that none of you ever come here, then he should," she interrupted him coolly. Juliet was trying way too hard to make him go through the pain she was going through now. The poor man didn't even know what he was doing wrong, and she had to give him credit for trying to fix his mistake.
"Why you doing this, Juliet?"
He asked the question, his broken heart coating his words, that she answered, her own voice breaking a little as she answered, "I... if I never meet you, then I never have to lose you." Juliet turned away from him, just so he wouldn't notice her crying.
Yet, at the Swan, when Sawyer was being held at gunpoint, her heart stopped in her throat, and she tried to save her. She barely noticed the metal chains entangling her until it was too late. "Sawyer!" she cried out.
"Juliet!" he cried back, and rushed to her side, and she was delighted to find that he was willing to drop anything to come to her aid. Naturally, he would've done it for anyone else, but she realized that maybe she had been wrong about Sawyer's feelings all along. She felt stupid. "Where do you think you're going, Blondie?" he nearly growled. In spite of herself, she wanted to laugh, but instead tried to look at him softly, trying to convey everything she wanted to say to him, but couldn't. "Don't you leave me," he said softly.
She was slipping, and realized that the longer he held on, Sawyer was in more danger of being pulled down with her. "It's okay," she told him quietly. Suddenly, she was reminded of something that Faraday had told her. It seemed like an eternity ago, but he had told her that they couldn't change history because of course-correction.
"Don't you leave me," Sawyer growled, trying to pull up the metal chains.
The tears fell from her eyes, combined with the struggle of holding onto the metal chains, and the realization that Sawyer loved her all along. "I love you," she sobbed. She knew that once the bomb went off, he wouldn't remember it. He wouldn't remember her. Damn it all, she was going to get everything she had ever wanted to say off of her chest before she let go.
"No, you don't let go!" he nearly screamed.
"I love you, James," she cried out, feeling herself being pulled closer and closer to the abyss. The tears were still coming, and she knew she had to let go soon, or Sawyer would be pulled down with her.
"Don't let go," he whispered. It broke her heart to realize she had put him through that much pain, even though an hour ago, that was all she had wanted.
"I love you so much," she said over his protests. If only she could hold herself up for a few more minutes. She missed Sawyer's words, as she slipped, and fell into the dark, hoping that her fall would cause Jughead to detonate. Faintly, she could hear Sawyer's sobs before closing her eyes, and bracing herself for impact.
At the bottom was Jughead, intact. "Come on!" she screamed, using the rest of her strength to get it to go off. If this worked, she would live again, and she would be with Sawyer again. "Come on!" she screamed, hitting it again with the rock. "No!" she screamed when it wouldn't go off. She became oblivious to the sounds of creaking metal around her. Jughead had to go off. "Come on! Come on! Come on, you son of a bitch!"
I love you, James, she thought as the white light flashed around her.
The ending was bleh-ish, but I hope that part of it was a tear-jerker. If not, I have serious work to do. And I hope this was better than the last challenge fic I wrote at any rate.
