Voldermort and the mirror.

Voldemort was having a disco. The party was for his 60th birthday and he was thoroughly enjoying himself. He and Harry had just been waltzing around the dance floor and Voldy was very out of breath.

"Aah, I'm not the dancer I used to be." Voldy sighed, leaning against Harry.

"Maybe if you didn't try to kill me so often then you wouldn't wear yourself out so much." Harry scolded him.

Voldy nodded in agreement.

"Protego." Harry muttered instinctively as Voldemort pulled out his wand and shouted "Crucio."

"Aah, you got me again." Grinned Voldy.

It was time for Voldy to make a speech and as he stood up on the stage in the great hall he felt a rush of happiness.

"I'd like to thank all for coming. I'm really pleased you could all make it, especially our guests that I've already murdered." Voldemort laughed, gesturing towards the piles of bodies that lined one side of the great hall. "I do apologise for any offence I have caused by murdering your family and friends, but it's always a laugh, ey?"

Now, I would just like to sing you a short song about my favourite spell…

"Avada Kedavra! What a wonderful curse
Avada Kedavra! They don't get any worse
It means no Harry, better call him a hearse (Okay - he's a hearse!)
It's our trouble-free artillery
Avada Kedavra!

Avada Kedavra! So nicely depraved!
Avada Kedavra! Even though you don't shave - yet
it means no Harry, he'll go straight to the grave (Yeah, sing it kid!)
It's our recipe for anarchy
Avada Kedavra!

It means no Wormy, and Dumbledore's in his grave
Love to hear them scream in that flash of green...
Avada Kedavra!
Avada Kedavra! Avada Kedavra!
Avada Kedavra! Avada Kedavra!
Avada Kedavra! Avada Kedavra!
Avada Kedavra! Avada Kedavra!
Avada Kedavra!" Voldemort sang at the top of his voice. When he was finished everybody cheered.

"I'd also like to make a shout out to Harry Potter, the boy who lived! He's just great isn't he? I love you Harry. Avada Kedavra!" Voldy shouted, but Harry conjured up a quick shield charm.

The music started again and Voldemort continued to party.

A few minutes later a conga began.

"Ooh, bagsy I go behind Snapey wapey." Squealed Voldemort, cursing the basilisk out of the way, because the basilisk also had a crush on Snape, Voldemort grabbed onto Snapes shoulders and they began to conga all through Hogwarts castle. When they'd congaed for nearly half an hour Voldy had to stop. He slipped out of the conga and into an empty classroom. He strolled across the room and noticed a rather lovely mirror.

"O.M.G That is like Gorgeous." Voldy commented.

He stepped closer and stared into the mirror; Voldy cared very much about his appearance and liked to admire it constantly.

He stopped dead.

HE HAD A NOSE!

"OH nosey wosey, I missed you!" Voldy cried, he put his hands up to his face. He felt no nose.

He decided he could no longer live without his nose so he did a big fart and gassed himself out with it. It went black. Then he was dancing naked with Dumbledore like he had always dreamed.