Mirror of Magic
Disclaimer:
I don't own Dragonball z or any of the characters. They're all trademarks of the legendary Akira Toriyama-sama, so don't sue me! ~_^Warnings:
There's swearing, kissing and violence, but all in good humor! ENJOY!!It was a pretty average day. Things were as peaceful as things would get. That is until our favourite Saiya-jin, Goku woke up. His days were really basic. Wake up, eat, train, eat, train, eat, and sleep. On some days, he would spar with Vegeta or Trunks, but other than that, he was a typical Saiya-jin. Goku headed downstairs to his kitchen and saw Chi-chi cooking up a storm, preparing a meal for her hungry Saiya-jins, Goku and Goten. Tomorrow was her birthday and she knew that if she were to get a gift, her family would have to think, which they couldn't do on an empty stomach. She was hoping that one of them would remember to get one anyway. If they didn't, that would be the fifth year in a row that they've forgotten. Goku sensed it and was more than willing to get a present.
"Morning, sweetheart. Hungry?" Chi-chi greeted her sleepy husband.
"Mmm. Smells great!" Goku replied. "Whatcha making?"
"Well, pork chops, mash potatoes, gravy…" the list went on. Goku took a seat and after a few minutes, Chi-chi gave him a couple of plates full of food. She watched him eat and her stomach started to grumble, but she ignored it.
"Aren't you gonna eat?" Goku asked in between bites.
"No. I'm going on a special diet. I think I'm gaining a little too much fat on my hips. What do you think, honey?"
Goku froze. Oh no. Goku thought to himself. It's one of those female traps that Gohan told me about. If I agree with her, she'll think I'm calling her fat. But If I say she looks thin, she'll think I'm lying. Jus then, Goten walked in.
"Um… ah, good ol' Goten. Let's ask him." Goku asked, trying to divert the question away from himself. "Do you think your mother's fat?" Chi-chi stared over at Goten. Behind her, Goku was shaking his head wildly.
"No time for talk," Goten replied. "Dr. Love has a patient. I've got a date with destiny. I'm gonna ask Bra out." Goten grabbed a couple of pork chops and was about to leave when Chi-chi stopped him.
"You're not going anywhere until you answer my question!" she yelled.
"What was the question?" Goten squeaked.
"Do you think I'm fat?"
"May I use a lifeline?"
"DO I?!"
"Um… may I poll the audience?" Next thing Goten knew, there was a frying pan slammed against his head.
"Did anyone get the license to that airplane?" Goten whined before he hit the floor. Chi-chi turned to Goku with murderous eyes. Goku panicked.
"CHI-CHI!! Calm down. You look just fine." Goku struggled to choose his words carefully.
Chi-chi's expression softened and she left the room.
"Uh, Goten? You alright down there?" Goku asked as he helped his son up. "We need to get your mother a gift and quick. Something to make her think she's not fat."
"How 'bout a wish from the dragon?" Goten suggested.
"Nah, I don't wanna manipulate Chi-chi with a wish. Besides, how will we find all the dragonballs in one day?" Goku began thinking, which quickly lead to a headache. "Maybe something that allows her to see how thin she really is. Like one of those circus mirrors that make ya look ten pounds lighter!"
"Yeah! But where would we find one of those in one day?"
"I could try teleporting to the nearest retailer." Goku placed two fingers one his forehead and began concentrating. In a flash, he disappeared.
Next, Goku found himself in the middle of a forest. He saw a small, eerie looking shop in a clearing. Great he thought happily. He walked into the shop and behind the counter stood a creepy old man.
"May I 'elp you?" the old man asked with an accent.
"Help," Goku muttered quietly, correcting the mistake. "Yeah, do you sell any mirrors that make a person look thinner? You know, one of those circus mirror." The old man smiled evilly.
I 'ave just de ting." The old man walked to a back door and returned with a small handheld mirror.
"Dis will make you tink you're tinner. One glance. If you look twice, de spell will wear of. Take it. Only tree dollar. No tax."
Goku looked at the old crone oddly. Not only was his accent annoying, but he was selling an antique mirror for only three dollars. There was something strange about it all. Goku shrugged it off and pulled three dollars from his pocket. The old man accepted and handed over the mirror.
"Domo." Goku said politely.
"You're very welcome." Replied the old man with an evil smirk. Goku didn't know if he should be worried or happy that he found a great gift. He left the shop and glanced at the little mirror. The handle was made of gold with a shiny red trim around the glass. It was beautiful in it's own eerie way. Goku sighed and teleported right in front of his house. He walked in and said, "I'm home." Goten rushed into the room.
"So? Where is it?" Goten asked eagerly. Goku presented the mirror. Goten looked at it with shock and disappointment.
"That's IT??!!" he yelled in bewilderment. "You were supposed to get a full length mirror, not a puny hand plate! You stupid twit!" Goten was about to hit Goku over the head when Chi-chi walked in.
"Hi boys." She cheerfully said. Goku and Goten quickly fumbled around with the mirror to hide it.
"Goku, I'm going grocery shopping and I need a lift." She gave Goku the puppy dog face.
"Sure," replied Goku, unable to resist the puppy-dog look. As he walked by Goten, he handed the mirror off and whispered, "Look after it." Then he left. Goten stood in the middle of the room, confused as to what to do.
"What am I supposed to do with this mirror?" Goten asked himself as he gazed at himself in the mirror. "Spooky!" he said aloud. He shoved it in his back pocket.
"I think I'll go spar with Pan before I go to Bra's." Goten suggested to himself and left the house.
Goku walked aimlessly through aisles and aisles of food. Just walking by them made Goku hungry. He was in aisle three, where all the ice cream and sweets were. Chi-chi had suggested that they split up in order to get all the food items they needed in less time. Goku had decided to go get the treats. His entire cart was full of them. Goku opened up a freezer door and grabbed a dozen froze desserts which he tossed into his shopping cart. I wonder what Chi-chi's up to? Goku thought. He continued down another aisle full of junk food and pop. Goku leisurely tossed roughly 8 bags of different potato chips and nachos into his cart. Then he grabbed 6 two-fours of pop and placed them carefully, so not to shake them. Last time he shook up a can a pop, it exploded in his face. He laughed at the thought of the entire case of pop exploding in Vegeta's face. That would be funny. He chuckled. Goku rounded the corner and was in the fruits and vegetables section. Goku laughed even harder. Vegeta. Vegetable! Hey wait a minute. Kakorrot. Carrot. That's not funny! Goku smiled and quieted his giggles. He picked out some strawberries, plums, celery, carrots (ha), broccoli and other stuff. He narrowly avoided the radishes for personal reasons. Soon, he was very bored of going aisle after aisle looking for food. He figured he had enough, so went to go find Chi-chi. After looking through some aisles, he found her looking though soap opera magazines.
"Hey Chi-chi," Goku said. Chi-chi looked up from her magazine and said, "Excuse me. Have we met before?"
"Huh? What are you talking about?" Goku asked.
"I don't seemed to recall who you are, miss. Did you go to the same school as I did or something?" Chi-chi asked, truthfulness in her voice.
"Nani?! MISS?!! Hey, stop playing with me Chi-chi. It's me, Goku." Chi-chi squinted at him.
"Do you know it's a crime to pretend you're someone you're not. Especially if the one you speak of is the opposite sex!"
"NANI??!! What the hell are you talking about?!"
"Listen 'Miss. Whoever you are', there isn't a chance in hell that you could pass as a guy, okay?"
"Chi-chi, stop it! It's really me! GOKU!!" Chi-chi frowned, but it quickly disappeared.
"Oh my Kami! It is you. I'm so sorry. What did you do to yourself?! You're a female!"
"WHAT???!!!" Goku began feeling faint and put her hands on her head. She felt long hair. It went down to her back. She gasped as she glanced slowly down her body.
"I have freaking BREASTS!!" Goku screamed in a girl voice.
"Goku, shhh. Someone might hear you!" Chi-chi hissed. "Let's just pay for our stuff and leave. We can sort this out at home." She ushered Goku to the cashier. They loaded their items on the converter belt. The total came to about 278 items which cost around $424.
"Wow, that's a lot less than what we usually spend." Chi-chi whispered to Goku. She quickly paid and gathered her food into another cart. When they got out side, a couple of teenagers whistled at Goku. She blushed uncontrollably.
"Shut your pie holes!" Chi-chi yelled in defense for Goku.
"What are ya, a lesbian?" one teenage joked. Chi-chi growled. She was about to turn on them when Goku stopped her.
"Let's just go, please." Goku pleaded. Chi-chi nodded. Goku pick her and the shopping cart up and flew away, leaving a confused group of teenagers behind.
"I gotta stop doing this crack." One teenager said aloud. The others nodded in agreement.
Goten soon arrived at Gohan's house and walked in without knocking.
"Hi everyone!" He announced. "Where's Pan at?"
"Oh hi Goten." Videl greeted the demi-saiya-jin. "Pan's out back." Goten nodded a thank you and headed to the backyard. Out there, he saw Pan dancing to some good music.
"Nice moves." Goten joked.
"Goten san?!" Pan yelped. "How long ave you been standing there? What are you doing here?"
"I'm insulted. Can't an uncle visit his niece? Besides, I want your opinion on this gift for your obaasan." Goten pulled out the mirror and showed it to Pan, who snatched it out of his hands.
"It's gorgeous. Absolutely lovely." Pan awed.
"You know, you don't have to lie." Goten muttered.
"I mean it. Did you pick it out?"
"No, tousan did. I didn't think he had it in him."
"Neither did I," Pan diverted her glance and place the mirror on the table next to her. "This isn't the only reason you came, right?" Goten smiled.
"How'd you know?"
"You've got that look in your eyes that says 'I wanna spar'.
"You know me too well, Panny." He dropped into his fighting stance. Pan did the same. It became a staring contest until Pan made the first move. She lunged at Goten with her fists drawn. Goten responded by blocking and returning with a kick. Pan dodged easily. She jumped into the air and fired a ki blast. Goten blocked and jumped after her. They faced off with a series of punches and kicks.
"TIMEOUT!!" Pan screamed. Goten froze in mid-punch. Pan had her eyes covered and was squealing in pain.
"Something whipped me in the face." She moaned in pain. "It wasn't my hair. My hair's tied back." She unshielded her eyes and stared in fear at Goten.
"Pan, what wrong?" Goten asked, not noticing that his voice was higher pitched.
"Goten san?" Pan whispered. "I don't believe it. I don't believe it. I don't believe it."
"You don't believe what?" Goten asked, getting impatient.
"You're a… you're a…" Pan trailed off and looked horrified. "A girl!" she finished.
"NANI??!! Goten screamed. He grabbed the mirror of the table a looked at his reflection. Sure enough, there was a reflection of a female.
"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" Goten screamed like a sissy. "Is this some kind of joke? Please tell me this is a joke." Goten pleaded. She felt her knees get weak and she continued to stare in the mirror in disbelief. Then she fainted.
"GOTEN!!" Pan yelled.
