Powerless: Chapter One

The infirmary at the Institute was deathly quiet. The harsh quiet was unnerving to Jace as he sat beside Clary's bed gently tracing the now fading healing rune on her forearm. He could see the tell tale remnants of the same marking stretched out over her collar bone where not more than two days ago she had been attacked by a Croucher Demon on what they expected to be a simple walk through Central Park. Neither of them had been quick enough to thwart the attack as the demon seemingly came out of nowhere. By the time he had pulled the dagger from his belt, the thing had already sunk its claw like fingers into Clary's shoulder ripping a sizeable gash. Clary's red blood spilled out soaking her thin gray tee shirt and for Jace the rest of the events played out in some sort of slow motion until its black ichor spread over the soft blades of grass and folded in on itself disappearing with a grotesque shriek back to whatever demon dimension it called home.

"I'm sorry," Jace said in a raspy whisper. He found it quite odd to be saying those simple words, words that he had always found useless when those from the mundane world uttered them about things that were beyond their control, yet there he sat saying them just the same. It was then that he felt Clary's cool hand reach up lacing her fingers through his. He let out a heavy sigh unaware that for the last several hours it was if he had been holding his breath.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," she said with a soft undertone in her voice as her eyes slowly started to open.

Jace looked up to see her beautiful clear green eyes looking back at him. "How are you feeling?" he asked with caution in his tone.

"Better," Clary replied.

He felt an eerie sense of déjà vu as the words fell off his tongue seeing as just a day prior he and Clary had had a quite similar conversation. Running his slender fingers against her cheek, she still felt warm and that concerned him. "Are you sure?" he questioned arching his brow.

"Yes, I'm fine," Clary insisted as she hoisted the weight of her body onto her elbows. Yet Jace wasn't buying it. Instantly he saw her face blanch and could read from her expression that she was doing what she could to fight of another wave of lightheadedness.

"Easy," he said as he gently, though with enough force for Clary to know he meant business, guided her head down against the stiff white pillow. "You want to try that again, how are you feeling, really?"

Clary knew that not only was she a terrible liar but that Jace could read her like no other person had ever been able to, not even Simon. But the last thing she wanted to do was further worry him. She could see by the deep set black shadows under his golden eyes that he had already lost sleep. "I think I just tried to get up too fast." She hoped that that would be enough of an explanation. It certainly wasn't a out and out lie, perhaps a half truth.

Clary rolled over on her side and patted the edge of the bed indicating she wanted Jace to join her. Shaking his head he did as she wordlessly asked, still not really believing that it was the mere swiftness of her movements that brought on her pallor. "Please don't worry. I'm fine. Really I am." Her voice pleaded with him.

Again Jace stroked her face softly, before leaning in and brushing his lips against her. "I am sorry. I should have been…."

Clary put her finger to his mouth silencing him. She knew what he was about to say and for her his apology was unnecessary nor wanted. "Sshhh," she murmured. "You did nothing wrong. What happened in the park is part of what being a Shadowhunter means. I knew that when I decided I wanted to be one. I am willing to take the risks."

Jace looked at her and wondered - was he willing to take those risks when it came to her life? He had never once before questioned what it meant to be a Shadowhunter, that they died young for a reason, yet the thought of Clary dying - at any age left him paralyzed. With that thought he tightened his grip on her hand as he pushed away a strand of fiery red hair that fell across her face.

"Are you hungry," he asked doing what he could to silence the nagging voice at the back of his mind that repeatedly cautioned that something just wasn't right with all of this. He couldn't shake the sensation that the healing irtaze should have worked immediately and that Clary shouldn't have needed a second.

"No, not really," she told him. "Would you lay with me?" she asked while pulling him against her not giving him the chance to protest or to see the wave of nausea that passed across her features.

There was little if anything Jace could refuse her so he easily allowed himself to be drawn into Clary's delicate arms his eyes resting once more on the rune that like the one drawn two days before had nearly disappeared now. He laid there quietly as she played with the soft curls at the nape of his neck enjoying the way her fingers felt against his skin. He had never expected to love someone as completely as he loved Clary. In all honesty he hadn't thought he was capable of it yet now he couldn't conceive of going back to a world where loving her wasn't a part of him. "I love you, Clary Fray," Jace whispered kissing her hand that was now draped across his chest.

"I love you too, Jace," she returned her tone matching his soft one. "Please don't worry," Clary asked again. "I am really okay." She hoped that he would believe her and allow himself to relax just a bit. Every muscle in his body felt like it was spring loaded and Clary hated more than anything that she was the cause of it all.

Jace's simple response to her comment was to kiss her hand again and draw it in close against his chest. He couldn't bring himself to agree with her just yet. He was sort of in a holding pattern of waiting to see what was going to happen next. The pair settled into a comfortable silence as the setting sun just outside the Institute cast a orange red halo throughout the large infirmary.

It wasn't until he felt the steady rise and fall of Clary's chest and knew she was asleep that he disentangled himself from her arms. Looking down at her sleeping form, Jace saw the traces of perspiration on her brow. In wiping it away his fingers were met with the heat that radiated from her. He wondered why he hadn't felt that when they were laying side by side. The knot in his stomach grew tighter as the sinking feeling took a greater hold over him. Withdrawing his stele, Jace began to draw the healing rune once more however he stopped short. What made him think that the third one would have made any difference when the first two hadn't seemed to help Clary in the least. There was definitely something wrong whether she would admit it or not.

"How's she doing?" Jace had been so caught up in his own thoughts that he hadn't even heard Alec enter the room.

All Alec needed to do was take one look at his friend's face and he knew the answer to that question without Jace even opening his mouth. "I don't know," he finally answered exasperated. "The runes aren't working at least I don't think they are."

Alec rested his hand on his friend's shoulder searching for the right words. Jace was always so cock sure of himself and for Alec to see him so indecisive now pained him. "Maybe we should get Magnus," Alec suggested. "He might be able to determine what's happening to Clary." Alec knew that Jace and Magnus were in no way friends, no matter what his relationship might have been with the High Warlock of Brooklyn, but Alec also knew that Jace would have done anything for Clary even if it meant excepting help from an unlikely source.

"Call him," Jace said as he sat down again in the chair adjacent to Clary's bed and watched her sleep praying to the Angel that his love was going to be all right.