Ludwig Beilschmidt was a nice guy. He didn't understand why Italy didn't love him back. After the divorce, Germany still treated Italy with love and respect, but all Italy gave him back was dirty looks and the cold shoulder. Why wouldn't Italy just give him another chance? One bad mistake shouldn't outdo all of the good and loving acts he did!

Germany sighed and pulled himself out of bed. Another morning of loneliness and sadness. It wasn't his fault! Italy should've been able to forgive him. After all, all of Germany's outstanding niceguy qualities should've made up for anything he did! He slid on his fedora, sighing. Maybe today would be the day that Italy saw how nice of a guy he was.

Before he left to go deliver his daily bouquet of roses to Italy's front steps, he checked himself out in the mirror to make sure he looked attractive enough to win Italy back. He reveled in the sight of his large, throbbing, massive, fedora. It gleamed in the sunlight, He admired the way the soft, grey fabric made him look like a nice guy. He stared at it gently, feeling rather fond of his fedora. He gazed at it, feeling lust for it. He realized what he had to do.

He reached up and delicately pulled the fedora from his tuft of greasy blonde hair. He stroked the fedora with adoration, whispering to it.

"We're the only nice ones around here... How didn't we notice that we were the right ones for each other all along?" He muttered before french kissing the fedora passionately. He pressed the fedora into the bed, feeling down his soft, wool body. Ludwig quickly ripped off his bicycle shorts in a fit of amorous enthusiasm. His desire was evident as his pulsing arousal sought out stimulation in one mighty twitch. Germany gave into his ravenousness and thrust his hungry cock against the supple ridges of his fedora. He roared with pleasure as he felt his 2 inch mutilated penis scrape against the fedora. He came with a loud scream of desperation and crushing depression. His semen dripped off the edges of the fedora in an unattractive way. Germany took his thick, cheetodust-covered fingers and scooped up his own seed between his fingers and tasting it. He could taste the pure heartache and pain of rejection in his own bodily fluids. Delicious.

The End! :)