A/N: This just popped into my head. Features my OC Soujiro is told from his POV.
…I really need to get a life.
"Talking"
'Thinking'
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'Ah' I said, enjoying the warm sun rays that filtered from between the trees. This was a good day to relax. Screw training, this was a much use of my time.
"Hey! Is that you Soujiro?"
Looking up, I see Naruto in all his orange glory, running at full speed waving his left arm in some sort of spastic movement. 'What an eyesore. What does he want?'
Sitting up, I prepared myself for the headache Naruto's voice usually causes. When he reached me, he skidded to a stop and started flailing his arms around, trying to emphasize a point he hasn't made yet.
"HeySoujiroIwaswatchingamovielastnightand-! " Right there his face started to turn purple, so I punched him in the stomach knocking the air out of his lungs, causing him to stop talking. Once he caught his breathe, he gave me a fierce glare.
"Naruto, slow down and take deep breaths. I don't understand a word you just said."
Several minutes later…
"So, Naruto, what was so important that you had to interrupt my slacking?" I asked, trying to get this over with as soon as possible.
"Well, I saw this movie last night. It was one of those Horror movies with the evil zombies that if they bite you, you become a zombie and-"
"Let me guess you had a nightmare and want me to explain to you scientifically how zombies cannot exist." This happened before when he was eight and he watched some vampire movie and I was forced to surround Naruto with garlic for a week.
"No, now that I'm a genin, I don't fear anything. I just thought the movie was weird is all." Said Naruto.
"How do you mean?"
"Well, I can understand the zombie virus spreading via infection and I can understand how they might cause the end of the world, what I don't understand is why the zombies killed every human in sight."
"But Naruto…they're zombies. It's what they do."
"Yea, I get that, but humans are their only source of food, right?"
"Right."
Well, why kill all of us? Once they kill us all, they're done too right? I mean, if I were them, I'd put the humans in farms, force them to reproduce a fair amount of children, then eat some of the older adults. That way, you would have a never ending supply of food! "
"…"
"And why didn't make the zombies super smart since they eat all of our brains. I think a smart zombie is waaay smarter than a brainless zombie."
"AND, why do the zombies eat brains? I mean, I don't know how a brain tastes, I've never tasted one, but still…, there must be better parts to eat. Like the heart. If I were a zombie, I'd eat the heart because it pumps blood through the body and has to have a lot of nutrients in it."
"…"
"And also,-"
"Naruto, it's a movie. I like that you are thinking, but you're thinking about something that's not very important. Now be a good ninja and practice your taijutsu."
Not wanting to listen to anymore of his zombie rant, I laid down and jabbed my fingers into my ears.
Zombies...how ridiculous can you get.
-***-**-*-*-**-*-
(Zombie HQ)
Four zombies stood around a crystal ball, having watched the conversation that took place between Naruto and Soujiro. One zombie in particular kept staring at Naruto, a respectful look in his eyes.
"He will lead us to greatness."
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So, how was it? Please Review.
