A/N: A severe case of writer's block and procrastination has meant it has been far too long since I wrote anything so I thought I should just go for it.
Summary: Charles knew that it was simply something a friend would do for another friend.
Disclaimer: I do not own these wonderful characters otherwise their story-lines would be far more developed.
The whole ordeal had drained her. She tried to put on a façade of having moved on from it. Admittedly, it was working pretty well as most of the staff were too preoccupied with their own ideas but he could tell. He watched as the many times she slowly and reluctantly lifted herself from her chair in the morning using more effort than she used to need. It was as if she was forcing herself against an invisible pressure that was pressing down on her. She continued to reprimand O'Brien and fought with Mrs. Patmore over the key to the store cupboard but the bite seemed to be gone from her voice. Charles was not one for sentiment and emotions but right now he was finding it harder and harder to growing worries in his mind. He knew that the second he gave in to a little emotion that a torrent would follow. He had firmly shut the door t any feelings he had after his years as a Cheerful Charlie because he had realised that it was emotions that made a person make the wrong decisions in life. He also know that with the soaring highs of excitement and lo..lust came the crushing lows of disappointment and rejection. He had suffered enough miserable lows to know that the highs had never been worth it. In his mind, the door to his heart was made out of solid but he also knew that, as he watched her in her weakened state, the cracks were beginning to show.
If he was completely honest with himself those cracks had started to appear on the first day she had first arrived at Downton. He wishes he could deny the memory but the image of her piercing blue eyes cuts through his denial as he remembers her slightly flushed face as she greeted him in her Scottish burr being much more pronounced than it is today. At times, it returns if she is angry or embarrassed and part of him wishes that he got to hear it more often but he knows thoughts like that but he knows thoughts like that cause him nothing but trouble. He also fondly remembers how their respective roles as heads of the downstairs have led to them spending many evenings together and forming a friendship that he treasures too much to throw away on a whim. No matter how much his heart aches because of it. He knows that it is his own fault that he has to act this way because he threw away whatever chance he had had before. In reality, he has long given up the pretence that he is happier this way but has come to accept that it is what he deserves.
He continues to watch her throughout the day and realises that today the cloud that hangs over her head is heavier than it has ever been. He can barely bring himself to look her in the eye because he sees is her once radiant delight replaced with sadness. It is at the end when she declines his offer of tea in his sitting room that he knows that he must do something. He knows that is what a friend would do. It would just be an act of friendship, he tells himself, whilst thoughts of the smile that might return to her face warm his heart.
A/N So I hope you enjoyed my return to writing fanfiction. I have a few ideas as to where this story is going and how it is going to get there but I am open to your suggestions so feel free to leave as many as you wish.
Reviews really are lovely. They are a bit like receiving a gold star when you are at school and I do like gold stars. :D
