That's Not A Thing

Hermione closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and said through clenched teeth, "Draco, that is not a thing!"

"Yes it is!" Draco replied. "The lady at the baby furniture store agreed with me!"

"She's an eighteen-year-old girl who's never had children! How could she possibly know?" Hermione was losing what little patience she had with her best friend.

Draco smiled triumphantly. "She said she tried it with her sister and sister-in-law when they were pregnant and it worked both times!"

"I'm not doing it!"

"Awe, come on, Mia!" Draco whined. "We couldn't even try with the boys. Now this little one is too strong for any of the regular spells to work either!" he flopped down on the couch in the sitting room. "I just want to know!"

"Quit acting like a baby." Hermione sighed. "Why is this so important to you? You and Harry have the boys. You said you were happy with them for now." she sat beside the pouting blonde man. "What's going on?"

Draco rubbed his hands over his face. "I don't know. I guess that I just want you to have a girl." When she only raised an eyebrow at her he continued. "If you have a girl then one of our boys can marry her. We'll be a real family. You won't ever leave us." Draco trailed off. He felt embarrassed by his own sentiment but he had a growing fear that all the people he loved would eventually leave if they weren't tied to him in some way.

"Oh, Drake!" she wrapped him in as fierce a hug as her rather large belly would allow. "I'm not going anywhere! You're stuck with me for life!" she giggled as her baby kicked at the man who seemed to be crowding her space. "And baby loves you, too!"

Draco sighed. "I know that, in my head, but I...it's just...you've become so important to me. I love Harry and want to spend the rest of my life with him. I couldn't be happier with our boys! But now you and Greg are going to have a baby. Babies take time and energy. You won't have time for us any more."

"Aw, I'll always make time for you!" Hermione shuffled around, trying to get comfortable. She groaned as her back twinged. The ache only seemed to get worse the more she struggled. "Can we stand up?"

"Are you okay?" Draco looked at her with concern. He helped her to her feet.

"Yeah," she put her hands into her back and stretched a little. The pain began to subside. "Just having trouble getting comfortable today. See? I'd still be stuck on the couch if it weren't for my Drakie-poo!"

Just then a very tall, very muscled, very handsome wizard walked into the room. "What is for your Drakie-poo?" he asked as he walked behind Hermione and wrapped his tattooed arms around her middle from behind. "Hello, wife." he murmured into her hair.

She sighed and leaned back into his solid form. "Oh, Drake's having a bit of anxiety over us abandoning him once our baby gets here." she was trying not to make it sound trivial but not over dramatic either.

"Not a chance!" Greg looked at his oldest friend. "You have to take her shopping! I'm not going! You won't be getting out of that any time soon!" Gregory Goyle was many surprising things to many people but a shopper was not one of those things!

"Yeah, well, Pansy could become your new shopping buddy. " Draco sniffed. Then he looked Hermione in the eyes with his best puppy dog look. "Just do it. It can't hurt. Please, Mia."

"It's too silly." She shook her head.

Greg rubbed his wife's large belly. He felt his child kick and smiled. "What kind of silly thing does Drake want you to do?"

"I want to know if you're having a boy or a girl." Draco answered. "All she has to do is hold a knut on her belly, turn around three times, and toss the knut into the air. If it lands heads up it's a boy. Tails is a girl."

"He's hoping we're having a girl so he can marry her to one of their boys." Hermione said to her husband.

Harry chose that moment to walk in holding a hand from each of his three year old twins. The wiggled out of his grasp and shouted "Daddy!" and ran to Draco. He scooped both up and kissed them several times. Then the boys squealed to be put down. They ran to Hermione and Greg for hugs and tickles. Then they were off to their toy bin to entertain themselves, chattering to each other the whole time.

Harry walked over to Draco and kissed him deeply. When they were done they returned their attention to the other grown ups in the room. Harry smiled and asked, "So, who are you trying to marry one of our boys to?"

"Your husband has decided that if we have a girl we need to get one of your boys to marry her." Hermione answered Harry.

"And why are we starting this so early?" Harry turned to the man in his arms.

It was Greg who spoke up. "Drake feels like Mia is going to abandon him once the baby gets here. And he thinks she is going to start shopping with Pansy instead of him." he looked down at his petite wife as she shifted and made a soft grunting noise. He also noted how her belly got really tight.

Harry laughed. "Do you remember the last time Pansy took Mia shopping?"

Hermione cringed, "I do! We had to call Ron to come to the store and get Pansy and Greg had to come get me! She had me and two clerks crying! I swore I'd never shop with her again and I haven't!"

Greg groaned, "That was bad. It took me half the day to get Mia calmed down. I won't let her go with Pansy, even if she hexes me seven ways from Sunday!"

Just then, Hermione clutched her stomach and groaned. She began to take deep breaths and squeezed her eyes shut. Greg kept his arms around her and could feel the tension running through her body. "Mia, you alright?"

After a few more minutes of breathing she nodded. "Yeah, I just think we should maybe go home and grab our bag."

Greg looked at her blankly, "Bag?"

"Yes." Hermione nodded. "The one we packed for the birthing center. I think we're going to find out the sex of our baby sooner than you think!"

"Well, crap!" Greg was a bit stunned. "I thought we had a week and a half to go!" he headed toward the floo, "You stay here! I'll go get the bag. Then we can go to the birthing center. Harry, Drake make her as comfortable as possible. I'll be about ten minutes." He left with out waiting for an answer.

Hermione whimpered. Harry hurried over to her. "Here, Mia, let's get you more comfortable."

"Wait!" yelled Draco. "Let's try the knut thing, now! I want to see if it's right!"

"Drake, really?" Harry looked at his husband like he'd lost his mind.

"Oh, alright!" Hermione sighed in frustration. "If it will give me some peace!"

Draco leaped around the furniture to Hermione's side and pulled out a knut. He held it up and was eyeing her stomach for just the right spot when she snatched it from him. "Give me that!" she slapped it to her belly and turned slowly three times. Then she flicked it up in the air. They all watched as it landed on the carpet.

Draco yelled, "I'll look!" and threw himself onto his knees, where he proceeded to crow triumphantly!

"Dada?" Harry felt a tug on his trouser leg and looked down.

"What's up, Jamie?" he asked one of his twin sons. James Potter-Malfoy looked just like Harry but had the platinum blonde hair and ice blue eyes. Where as, his brother, Scorpius, Looked exactly like Draco but with raven hair and vivid green eyes.

"Why's daddy acting weird?" Jamie giggled. Although he had a firm grip on Scorpius' hand, his brother looked rather worried.

Harry crouched down and pulled both boys in for a hug. "Don't worry about daddy. He's just playing a game with Auntie Mia. Now, how would you boys like to go stay with Great-Aunt Andy and Cousin Teddy?"

"Yeah!" both boys shouted as Harry led them away to pack a bag. He hollered back at his 'sister', "Mia. I'm taking the boys to Andromeda's and then I'll follow you over."

Hermione was holding onto the back of the couch trying to breath through the pain. "Okay..." she managed to reply. As the contraction was subsiding, Greg walked in from the floo.

"Babe, why are you still standing?" then he looked at Drake who was still on his knees holding the knut up in victory. "And do I want to know what Drake is doing on the floor?"

Hermione looked up at her husband with a look of horror. "He'll explain later. We've got to go!" she looked down at the floor. Greg looked at the growing puddle underneath her. "My water just broke!"

Two things happened in that moment, first Greg scooped his wife into his arms. They were into the floo in no time at all. The second thing that happened was that Draco fainted. Harry walked back into the living room with the boys. His keen skills at observation gave him a quick understanding of what happened. So, he left his husband where he was and only came back after the boys were settled.

Six hours later...

"Greg...I want to go home..." An exhausted Hermione whimpered to her husband.

"I know, Chicky-Babe." He soothed while he brushed her hair from her face. "But we can't do that until we've got our wee one."

"Just a couple more pushes, Hermione, and then you will get to meet your baby!" Healer Luna Longbottom encouraged. "Now, on the next contraction bear down as long as possible."

Fifteen minutes later, Hermione gave a growl followed by a scream. Then for a moment all was quiet. Finally the cry of an infant filled the room. Both parents were searching for their baby.

"Congratulations! It's a beautiful baby girl!" Luna smiled as she laid the baby on Hermione's chest. "Daddy, do you want to cut the cord?"

Greg looked up as Luna passed a funny pair of scissors to him. She showed him what to do and then a medi-witch scooped up their tiny girl and took her to the other side of the room. Hermione looked at her husband as he watched his new daughter with longing. "Greg, it's okay if you follow her."

He looked at his sweaty, exhausted wife and couldn't imagine a more beautiful woman in all the world. Leaning down he gave her a sweet kiss. "I'll be right back with our daughter." His heart was fit to burst with the joy his little family filled him with.

It wasn't long before Hermione was put to rights and wheeled into the recovery room. She was holding her daughter and a few tears were trickling down her cheeks. Greg was beside her looking proud as a peacock.

"Well?" Draco, who had been directed to the room along with Harry, demanded. "Did we have a girl?"

"Drake!" Harry hissed.

Hermione and Greg laughed. "Yes, Draco." Hermione pulled the blanket back from her daughter's perfect face. "Come meet Persephone Jean Granger."

"Yes! I was right! It worked!" Draco crowed as quietly as he could. "It is officially a thing!"

"It's not a thing, Draco!" Hermione replied and rolled her eyes.

Greg Goyle stood behind his wife as she playfully argued with his best friend. He watched as Harry and Draco oohed and aah'd over his baby girl. It struck him in that moment how things had turned out. The second wizarding war had taken his family and most of his friends from him. He had been prosecuted, ridiculed, and exiled from the society in which he had been raised. And in a strange turn of events, he had been rescued by the very person he had been taught to hate. Hermione had led him to this odd group of people he now called family and he couldn't be happier.

"It's not a thing, Draco!"