I'm in love and always will be

Song: "White Flag" by Dido

I was trying something different so, go ahead and listen to the song while you read it, maybe it will make a difference in the story.

Grimmjow X Ulquiorra, Depressing, for all ages, in Ulquiorras POV.


I know you think that I shouldn't still love you,

Or tell you that.

I, Ulquiorra Shiffer was always quite from the moment I was born. I never cried or made a sound of pain even when I was in pain. I grew up not knowing love or emotion. I was in a monotonous life cycle, filled with internal conflicts and days flashing by me quickly. I was twenty before I realized that my best friend and rival loved me, and that he always would. That day was the first day I cried, and the first day I hugged, and the first day I kissed and it was definitely the first day I ever

Loved.

But if I didn't say it, well I'd still have felt it

Where's the sense in that?

We were just a small secret for a while, Grimmjow and I. That was his name. Grimmjow Jeagerjaques, blue hair spiked back, cyan eyes that pierced straight through to my soul, if there even was such a thing at the time. He was compassionate, in fighting and loving. To just think of him makes my throat clench up, my eyes water, and my heart feel like it has been hanged by a noose, dead. He was the one who made me feel, and I could never thank him enough for that, because it's ruining me to not be near him, or ever be near him again. He didn't get it, the things I had to do for him, Grimmjow, with the disgusting creep called a ruler, Aizen, to save my loves life.

I promise I'm not trying to make your life harder

Or return to where we were

I was trying to leave him for his life, and he told me he didn't care, that there was no force in the world that could make him move from the spot in front of me, his hands were on my shoulders as he held me still in front of him, blue eyes shaking in pain, his body language even told me the pain he was, slightly bent, knees weakening, he understood what not leaving me meant, and he was ready to leave me for good just to prove a point.

Aizen had threatened to kill Grimmjow if we ever showed love for each other again. Aizen used my weakness against me, and my strength to manipulate me into doing what he wanted, I pushed Grimmjow away. I wanted Grimmjow to live, I wanted him to keep smiling and fighting and even if we couldn't be together again, I still wanted someone to look forward to seeing again, even if we couldn't be together in that sense.

It wasn't fair, no matter how much I wanted to be with him, it was my selfish reasons versus his life, and I would rather live in torture than see Grimmjow hurt, and Aizen could see it, the pain he was causing; the same pain he laughed at on a daily basis. He stood behind Grimmjow glaring at the disobedience Grimmjow showed. Hot tears streamed down my cold cheeks and down my throat to play at my hollow hole.

"Leave, please." I pleaded. I would have gotten on my hands and knees for Grimmjow, I would have begged and begged, I would have even taken my life if I knew that it would keep Grimmjow alive. "Please!" I sobbed. "Just say you will stop seeing me! Just say you don't love me!" I shouted. Grimmjow jostled me as he slammed his body against mine in a fierce kiss, his arms encircling me warmly and lovingly as Grimmjows brows furrowed. And it seemed as if time flew by slowly, my mind feeling fuzzy before Grimmjow pulled away to kiss my forehead.

"Never. Not even if I die." Grimmjow said, which only made me cry more. He hugged me closer to him and for a moment everything seemed to freeze like it always did when Aizen hypnotized people. I broke away, the feeling of the tiny prickle of hot steel press into my front. With a gasp Grimmjow backed farther away from me holding his chest as Aizen grinned a disgusting grin, one that made my stomach twist in pain and have an acidic like feeling. Grimmjow crumpled to the cold grey tiling, clutching his chest where every hollows heart would be; blue eyes wide and dark as Aizen held his bloody Zampakuto and stepped over him slightly to get a better grip on Grimmjows hair. A chuckle playing on his lips.

"Grimmjow!" I shouted lunging forward to be caught by Tosen and Gin, my throat clenching as I got to watch Grimmjows neck get slit by Aizens blade, and that was then I knew I wasn't hypnotized by Aizens Zampakuto. It was reality and I would never see Grimmjow again. A shiver ran through my body as I slumped against the two men holding me. "No… Gods please no." I cried as I slipped to the floor, Gin and Tosen letting me go, seeing that I couldn't fight them, I felt too weak. I crawled forward towards Grimmjow whose blood seemed to seep into everything, the tiling, his white uniform, my white uniform, and all the while Aizen grinned menacingly above me. I hated that man.

I will go down with this ship

And I won't put my hands up and surrender

There will be no white flag above my door

It's been six years now, I sit lifelessly, my green eyes glossy most of the time, like a dolls, as I remember him. The one who brought me to the light and out of the shadows of the world. I always imagine Grimmjow walking through the door to kiss my neck and tell me everything would be okay, and that he was there, when we both know he isn't there at all. If there was one thing I could say to Grimmjow, just one thing, it would have to be five little words…

I'm in love and always will be.


I know it's really short but it sparked my interest and I wanted something sad at the time. Review and tell me what you thought, I'm going to go and cry now, because there is no way in hell I will be able to write another story where Grimmjow dies and Ulquiorra is left all alone. : ( I'm gunna go see you next story. ~ Kaine.