Hellmouth Musings, Part 1:

Wishes:
Four Wishes That Could Have Happened On The Hellmouth...
And One That Should Have


Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer, or any of the characters, locations, plot ideas or other aspects entailed in the show. They are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy and all other companies that, well, own the copywrite. I am merely the owner of the unnamed wisher in Wish 3, and the concepts entailed in each of these wishes. Basically - their world, my words, don't steal!

Rating: T, due to references to suicide and some themes.

Description: Four wishes that could have happened on the Hellmouth, and one that should have. A collection of 5 'What if' stories, the first of my Hellmouth Musings collection.


Wish One: Something Wicked

"If only vampires were real," complained Jesse to Xander and Willow. They had just been at Jesse's, watching an old Dracula movie, and laughing their heads off at the dodgy special effects, when the parents had come home and literally shoved them out of the house, telling them to 'go enjoy the sunshine while you can'. Nevermind the fact that it shone practically every day in Sunnydale, whereas the movie was only on right then.

"Yeah," said Xander. "That would be awesome."

Willow shook her head. "I don't know – they sound pretty scary and stuff. You two would be fine – but they go after girls -" she pointed to the television as evidence "-and the girls don't generally make it out alive."

"Whatever," said Jesse. "I wish I could meet a vampire."

Across the street, a woman smiled and her face morphed. "Done," she whispered.

The next day, a new student came to Sunnydale.

Her name was Buffy Summers.

Wish Two: Why Won't You Scream?

Tuesday. Cordelia hated Tuesday's. They were always icky, for some reason. There was never the freshness of Mondays (if school was ever fresh), the at-least-we're-halfway-through feeling of Wednesdays, the can't-be-stuffed mood of Thursdays or even the two-hour-to-go sense that controlled all of Friday.

No. Tueday's... They just were, and for some reason that pissed her off no end.

It didn't help that Xander Harris – aka, the world's most despicable cheating loserific ex known to human kind – was trying to talk to her.

"Listen, Cordy – I'm sorry, I never meant-"

"Shut up! Just shut up, okay? I've had it up to here with you and your stupid words – I wish you would just shut up. Permanently!"

Xander looked at her in horror and for a moment Cordelia couldn't figure out why these words, of all the insults she'd been throwing at him lately, had cut so deep. Then she realised exactly what she said, only a moment before Xander voiced it.

"You said the 'w' word..."

"Oh, crap..."

They both turned and looked at a nearby student, who had suddenly spouted a demon face and a malicious grin.

"Done," she said.

And the world twisted, and the next thing they knew, Xander was mute.

Wish Three: Nice One, Buffy.

"I wish I didn't have this stupid power," murmured Buffy under her breathe. She was sitting in Science class and unfortunately for her the teacher had to choose the exact day that she had psychic powers to start learning about the reproductive system.

You'd think that by their senior year the guys would manage to restrain their thoughts just slightly.

So preoccupied was Buffy in avoiding the thoughts of others that she didn't notice a figure looking through the window, with a decidedly demonic face, whispered... "Done."

The thoughts stopped.

A few days later, Jonathan Levinson was found dead in the Sunnydale High clocktower, a rifle on the floor and a bullet in his brain. There was a short ceremony and then his body joined the many residing in Sunnydale's cemeteries. Before long, the Scoobies were so caught up in stopping the destruction of the entire senior class – and then some – by the Ascended Mayor, that his name slipped from their minds – another victim of the stress of Sunnydale life.

In fact, the next time anyone brought him up was much later – almost a year – and the people who brought him up were not Buffy and her friends at all, but Warren Mears and Andrew Wells.

"What we need is a summoner," complained Warren. "We need a summoner."

"Yeah. If only Jonathan was here," agreed Andrew. "Ah well. Wanna go play video games?"

"Yeah, okay."

Wish Four: Wisher's Revenge

"I wish Anya Jenkins had never returned to Sunnydale," snapped the woman. Unlike many others, she was fully aware of the nature of the being beside her, having made a wish before.

So the sudden change of face did not startle her, nor did the way that fabric of time unwound itself around her.

She did blink, however, and when her eyes opened, there was a whole new world around her.

This was her revenge, you see – the price that conniving bitch would pay for taking a half-meant phrase and turning it into a fatal revenge. In return for taking away her lover, well, she would take away Anyanka's.

Smiling in a malicious manner, the black haired woman walked up to Xander Harris, now sitting by his lonesome in the college bar, and said...

"Can I buy you a drink?"

Wish Five: A Sympathetic Ending

It started with a whistle.

Well, actually that wasn't quite correct.

It started with a Whistler. Yes, that was much better.

It started with a Whistler, appearing as the Scoobies, plus the newly Slayer-ified Potentials, checked into a motel. Buffy was walking towards her room, ignoring the sounds of Willow and Kennedy arguing when she heard a show clapping sound behind her. She whirled around, stake in hand, to find the Whisperer in front of her.

"Give me one reason why I shouldn't stake you right now and be done with it," she snapped.

The Whistler merely grinned and stepped forward, an action that told her straight away that he wasn't fully corporeal. If he had been, he wouldn't have got within twenty feet of her due to fear. He seemed like that sort of guy. "Firstly, it wouldn't do any good, now would it?" asked the grin. "And secondly, I'm actually here to reward you."

"Really?" quipped Buffy. "Cos this isn't the first time I've saved the world, and the Powers That Be never bothered with a gift basket before now."

The Whistler shrugged. "Never done something this big before, have you?"

"I think I've done plenty things of the big, so I'll ask again: why now?" said Buffy.

"Look, do you want the reward or not?"

Buffy glanced side to side, thinking. After a moment she said, "Sure, why not?"

"It's a wish."

Buffy stared at him for a moment. He couldn't be serious. "Look, Buddy," she said. "If I wanted a wish, I'd walk up to the nearest Vengeance demon and say 'Beam me up, Scottie', so why exactly do the Power-"

The Whistler cut her off, rolling his eyes. "It's not just any wish. It's the wish. One wish that can do anything you want. And it's your's." He smiled and tipped his bowler hat at her. "Use it wisely," he said, and vanished.

Buffy was silent as she looked at the spot where the Whistler had been. The sound of a slamming door, and a final shout from Kennedy ("Fine! It's over, then.") tore her from her daze. Slowly and deliberately, Buffy pocketed her stake, which had not left her hand since his appearance, and then turned and walked away...

The next morning, Buffy knocked bright and early on Willow's motel room door. There was the sound of someone getting up, and then the bleary-eyed, sad-looking redhead appeared at the door. "Yeah? What is it?" asked Willow. "Because if it's about Kennedy – I don't care, okay? It was her idea to leave and I'm not going to fight over it. I'm just going to curl up with a big tub of ice cream and watch soaps, okay?" There was a pause. "And I'm rambling again, aren't I?"

"Yes, you are, Wills," said Buffy, the disturbingly large grin on her face having not faded a millimetre during Willow's ramble. "And that's okay because I've got something that'll cheer you up!"

"What?" asked Willow, unable to keep a small smile from appearing on her face at her friend's enthusiasm.

"Well, last night, I ran into Whistler – you remember him, weirdo demon guy working for the Powers That Be? – and he gave me a wish. Any wish, for whatever I wanted."

Willow was looking a bit more awake by now. "What did you do?"

"Well, I was trying to decide on it, you know, just walking around the town and then I saw these really nice pair of shoes in a store, and..."

"You used the wish on the shoes, didn't you?"

Buffy's grin widened, and Willow suddenly got the feeling that she had been meant to say that. "No, silly!" Buffy replied, and then stepped aside, allowing Willow to see past her.

Standing there was the one person Willow thought she would never see again. For a moment she just stood there, unable to believe her eyes. "What... Is that really..." she whispered.

Buffy simply smiled as the product of her wish stepped forward and embraced Willow. Tears were streaming down their cheeks as they held each other. Without a word, Buffy walked away, still smiling, as the laughter began – blissful, glorious laughter.

Because some things, you can only wish for.

A/N: Yeah, yeah, I know – half of these aren't even normal vengeance demon wishes. But there's got to be wish demons out there who just do harmful wishes right, and technically wishes 1 & 3 do harm someone. At least, that's my argument and I'm sticking to it. Also, wish 1 could actually have taken place for all we know, but it is sort of unlikely. As for the fifth wish, it is pretty common knowledge that the 'Buffy gets a life-changing wish' idea was considered for Season 7, and would have included the return of Tara but was abandoned due to the inability to get Amber Benson for the episode. Therefore, it is IMHO an event that in ideal circumstances would have been made canon, and therefore can be considered for the 'should have' wish. Oh, and please review, because reviews are shiny.