Disclaimer: Don't own nothin'.
WARNING: this is not for fans of a certain vampire romance novel. I you review me badly because I slight this novel, which I do not acknowledge as literature, then I will send my pet Basilisk on you. You have been warned.
The roaring fire in the Gryffindor common room was spluttering feebly, the merry flames reduced to ash, as it had been burning all night long. Only a small group of students remained, talking the time away.
Six of them, all gathered in the comfiest armchairs around the fire, surrounded by Exploding snap cards, sugar quills, wrappers from Honeydukes finest chocolate and empty boxes of Bertie Botts Every Flavour Beans.
The group were swapping Chocolate Frog cards between then. James, throwing the stolen Snitch and catching it just before it flew away. Next to him, Lily, her long red hair illuminated by the flames. Then Sirius, carelessly handsome, running his fingers through his hair. Alice, writing a letter to her best friend Frank, and Remus, devouring a Chocolate Frog, with a look of pure ecstasy on his scarred face. The only one not participating in the conversation was Peter, who was immersed in a book.
'What are you reading, Wormy?' asked James, distracted momentarily from Lily.
'This?' said Peter, holding up the book. 'It's a teenage vampire romance novel, about a girl called Bella who falls in love with a vampire called-'
'NOOO! SILENCIO!'
'STUPEFY!'
'DENSAUGEO!'
'LANGLOCK!'
'FURNUNCULOUS!'
Five people abandoned their leisurely activities, five people drew their wands and five different curses shot straight at Peter. There was a loud BANG and Peter disappeared in a cloud of smoke. When the fog cleared, Wormy was out cold, covered in boils, with massive beaver-like teeth, his skin a lightly blueish colour. The different hexes had created quite and interesting effect.
'Burn it,' lily whispered urgently.
Sirius picked up the book and tossed it into the fire. 'Incendio,' he muttered, giving his wand a wave.
But the book didn't burn.
The others added their spells. 'Incendio! INCENDIO!'
The combined spells took effect. The book caught fire and began to burn, the cover melting horribly. Alice thought she saw a pale, ghostly figure emerge from the book, but it was devoured by the flames before she got a closer look.
'We must never speck of this,' said Remus gravely, staring into the cinders.
They all nodded solemnly. Each of them knew, at that moment, they would carry this secret to the grave.
So, what did you think? I agree, it was pointless, but ever so much fun to write!
