Meow: Mango kept on procrastinating again…pfft. Well, Meow made a Halloween special for you all. :D
Disclaimer: …pheonixflamechimera78 doesn't own Bleach. Rejoice, for the Day of Judgment has yet to pass. I just felt like writing that.
Plain text=…plain text.
"Quoted plain text"=talking
Italics=setting/thoughts/emphasis
Bold=Meow's A/Ns
Happy Halloween from Meow and Mango! (This was written on Halloween…Meow didn't post it because there was a Halloween party Mango's house. And on Halloween, candy is more important than fanfiction. Heck, candy is more important than everything all the time. So the "extending the Halloween spirit" crap was a lie. Oh well.)
October 24, 2009
"…Other announcements…oh, yes!" boomed Yamamoto's voice throughout the Soul Society. "Seated officers of the Gotei 13 are encouraged to register for the Costume Contest to be held a week from today at the Halloween Party! That concludes the announcements for today, and have a nice day fighting and dying to protect a royal family that none of you have met or even seen!" Nobody can actually argue with that.
Squad 2 Barracks
Hmm…thought Soi Fon. I would dearly love to dress up as Yoruichi-sama; however, I must be careful not to disgrace her…hmm…
"Eh, taichou, are you gonna dress up?!" asked Omaeda, who was, as usual, eating something. Nobody really knew what, nor did they want to know. Whoa. That basically directly came out of Artemis Fowl. Should I quote that, or disclaim that, or what? … *sweat drop*
"Shut up, you useless fat slob!" answered the small captain irritably. "I am thinking, which may I add, is something you rarely do!" Burn, Omaeda, burn.
Ignoring Soi Fon, Omaeda went on. "I'm not going to dress up, because there isn't a single costume good enough for me."
"Correction, Omaeda, there isn't a single costume that comes in a size big enough for you. Now shut the hell up, and do my- I mean your paperwork!"
Squad 3 Barracks
It's so lonely here, thought Izuru. I'm not really in the mood to dress up…meh…I don't even want to go to the party…I wish taichou were here…I wish Momo loved me…I wish I wasn't the only blond in the Soul Society… T_T Poor Izu-kun…
Squad 4 Barracks
"I'm going to dress up, Isane," said Unohana in her gentle voice while smiling. "Are you going to dress up?"
"Well, taichou," replied Isane. "I don't really know what to go as, so I guess not."
"I think it would be a great idea for you to dress up, Isane. You work too hard. You deserve a break."
"But, taichou, I don't know what to go as!"
"I don't care, Isane, dress up," said Unohana in the same motherly voice, wearing the same kind smile.
Isane decided to dress up.
Squad 5 Barracks
I wonder if Aizen-taichou will dress up, thought Momo. He wouldn't consider it too childish…no…I wonder what he'll go as…I wonder if he's doing okay…I wonder if those arrancar are too idiotic for him…I wonder if he'll come back… We seem to be following a pattern here…
Squad 6 Barracks
Hmph, how childish, thought Byakuya as soon as Yamamoto's voice stopped echoing around the room. And then, I will have to remember to file a complaint about how loud these speakers are.
"Taichou, I'm going to dress up!" said Renji excitedly. "Are you going to?"
"I consider this completely unnecessary and childish," said Byakuya. "I most certainly have no intention to attend."
"But I'm going as a pineapple!"
"It was my impression that everybody already considers you one."
"No, I'm going as a green-and-yellow, actual, big, pineapple!"
Byakuya blinked. "Dyeing your hair does not actually qualify as a costume, Abarai." I know, I know, overused…blah blah blah. Whatever. It was too good to pass up.
Squad 7 Barracks
"Iba, I'm going as a cat!"
Hol-ey shit, thought Iba.
Squad 8 Barracks
"Nanao-chan~!"
SMACK.
"OW! Nanao-chan, I just wanted to see if you would go to the contest with me!"
"No."
"But Nanao-chan, I wanted to be a sake bottle, and it wouldn't be any fun without a cup!"
"Sigh…If you insist on embarrassing yourself, I suppose it cannot be helped."
"See? Nanao-chan likes me, she just can't admit it!"
"Shut up, or I'm not going!"
"Yes ma'am."
Squad 9 Barracks
I don't want to go, thought Hisagi as he sat in the desk that used to belong to Tousen. I'm too busy feeling betrayed. I'm too busy being a pervert and thinking about Rangiku. I'm too busy getting drunk. I'm too busy hating my powers. I'm too busy thinking. I'm too busy being busy. And then, I'm too busy being pathetic. O_O Angst, man, angst. Nothing quite like it.
Squad 10 Barracks
"Wow, taichou, we could totally go! You could be…a kitty! And I'll be a sexy maid!"
"Matsumoto, I'm not going as a freaking cat, and you will not be a 'sexy maid'! I forbid you from going to that stupid party in any costume that flaunts your…assets!"
"But, taichou, I'll do all my paperwork for a day!"
Hitsugaya was impressed, but this was too good an opportunity to give up. Besides, if he went as a kitty, Momo might think he was cute. "Hmm…a week. And you have to be sober for the entire week."
"Three days for paperwork and no alcohol!"
"Four."
"Deal!"
Squad 11 Barracks
"…and that's why Maki-Maki should go as a Christmas tree, Pachinko-Ball should go as shower curtains, Drag Queen should go as an inflatable bed, and Kenny should go as a diaper!" finished Yachiru.
Silence filled the room.
And then, "I object."
All heads turned toward Yumichika, hoping that he would save them all.
"Inflatable beds are not beautiful in any way. I would much rather be something like a down comforter."
All dreams of salvation were instantly dashed. What can I say, they were idiots to trust Yumichika to save them anyway.
Squad 12 Barracks
"Nemu, I am going as an Egyptian pharaoh, and you will be the Sphinx!" Look at Mayuri, and tell me that Kubo didn't watch too many Egypt movies while creating him.
"Yes, Mayuri-sama."
Squad 13 Barracks
"I wanted to go as tea, and I need a kettle and…" said Ukitake.
"I will be your kettle, sir! I'll do whatever you need me to do!" yelled Sentaro.
"I will make a better kettle, sir!" said Kiyone.
"I will be a more devoted kettle, sir!"
"I will be a more enthusiastic kettle, sir!"
"No, I will!"
"No, I will, ass-kisser!"
"No, I will, suck-up bitch!"
The verbal fight turned into a sissy fight, which turned into an all-out, on the floor brawl. This continued for several minutes before Ukitake said, "…I also needed a teabag…"
"I will be your teabag, sir!"
"No, I will!"
"No, I will, ass-kisser!"
"No, I will, suck-up bitch!"
October 25, 2009
"All taichous and fukutaichous who have not registered will be assigned costumes by Kusajishi-fukutaichou of the 11th squad," said Yamamoto's voice over the speakers.
Seven people just got doomed.
GASP!!!! WHAT WILL HAPPEN?!
I don't know.
To be continued…! Dun dun dun…
