yikes so i started this abt a month ago, didn't finish it, then started thinkin bout these dorks again n decided to finish it. i don't see enough soninfinite from the fandom? and i demand more. it's really heckin cute y'all they deserve better.

anyways, this is an au where the phantom ruby was controlling infinite? sort of a redemption thing.

also, yeah, the title is from the song strawberries and cigarettes by troye sivan bc i'm really gay and love, simon is my shit.

warning for swearing (and a lot of self loathing :/)


It's sort of weird being in a prison again.

Sure, he's on the other side of the bars, walking free, with his best friend by his side, and a somewhat brittle smile on his face.

But when he looks at the walls, gray metal, pristine and glossy and plain, it's hard not to imagine splatters of viscous, sticky blood staining them. It's hard not to remember being stuck in a cell, chained to the wall with Chaos Inhibitors that make him feel weak and shaky. It's hard not to envision the beatings he'd receive, the long nights he'd spend crying at the ceiling, the hallucinations that his captor would induce with the Phantom Ruby's power, of all his friends dead around him, the world in flames, Eggman and Infinite howling with laughter, because he couldn't save them, he was too weak, he didn't—

"Sonic?" chirps a young voice, concerned and gentle. The hedgehog blinks, and turns to his brother, who's eyeing him warily. "You good?"

The speedster tries to swallow down the fear, but it's hard to make his throat work. "Mhm," he grunts out in response. He trains his eyes ahead, where the G.U.N. guards lead them down the increasingly dark and increasingly congested hallway.

He can feel Tails' worried gaze pressing into the side of his head, but Sonic refuses to register it. However, he fails to stifle a trembling sigh when he feels a nimble hand squeeze his own, reassuringly.

Tails knows how much he'd grown to hate prisons. He'd known ever since they had first both had time alone, back when they were reunited, and Tails was home and Sonic was free. They'd stayed up all night, in their tiny bunker, crying into each other about how horrible it had been not knowing if the other was dead or not.

And now they were okay. They'd liberated the world, rebuilt it, rekindled it.

Sometimes things didn't always feel quite okay, though.

"Are you nervous?" the boy genius asks, his voice level and soothing. He's trying to distract Sonic. It's always been what he does, whenever he can tell the hedgehog is upset.

For a moment, the older brother pauses, mustering up some coherent thoughts beyond the drowning whispers of bleeding out on the floor, another vision of Tails dying in his arms, of getting swallowed in an endless, black sea, Eggman is laughing as he runs countless experiments on him, and he's too broken to fight back anymore—

"No," Sonic startles himself with his own, mechanical response. He takes a deep breath. In and out. "… No, we've been working really hard to get him free. I'm excited."

Neither comments on the lack of enthusiasm in the statement.

"You don't have to do this, you know," the kit says, "If you really can't stand to see him. I can speak to him alone; I'll be fine."

Sonic shakes his head, "No, it's okay. I've spoken with him a few times already. I wanna make sure he's doing alright."

And Tails knows they've been over this plenty of times, but he's still worried sick, so he finds himself blurting out, "And the whole… Living arrangement?"

This makes the teenager falter.

"Uh, I, um. We've discussed this, Tails, it's fine. He needs a home, and I wouldn't trust him to stay with anyone but us."

Tails frowns. "Sonic—"

"I'm serious," the hedgehog snaps back, maybe a little too quickly. "Besides, the public needs to know he's not… what he was, anymore. If he's living with the two biggest heroes on Mobius, that'll put a lot of people at ease."

"Or, it'll make them think we're crazy for keeping a mass murderer in our house," the young fox grumbles.

"That's enough," Sonic grits out, and it's a little jarring, because Tails can't remember the last time that he's spoken to him in this tone. "Tails, we've already talked about this. We've already fought the case to prove him innocent. We both know he was a victim. We both agreed that we're okay with him staying with us. I don't get what your sudden problem is."

The mechanic sighs, "Sorry, I just… I'm worried about you. You look really uneasy about all of this."

Sonic huffs exasperatedly, throwing his arms in the air, "Is now really the time to start planting doubts in my head, then?!"

All of the guards around them try hard not to gawk at their raising voices.

"Oh, gee, I'm sorry," Tails snarls, balling up his fists and narrowing his eyes, "It's just, the last time you saw the guy he wanted you dead."

"The last time I saw him, we were on the phone, and he was barely stopping himself from breaking down crying because he felt so goddamn guilty, and he couldn't believe I was even bothering trying to help him after everything he did!" Sonic barks.

It's clear that they're delving into uncharted territory, because since when does Sonic swear?

No, Tails reminds himself, this isn't new. He's been struggling to maintain a filter on his own mouth ever since the war ended.

The fox takes the bait, his vision blurring a little with tears because he's so angry but he's just so scared for his brother. "Exactly: on the phone! The last time you saw him, he was insane, and he wanted to destroy the world. Not too long ago, he had you chained to a wall, forcing you to hallucinate horrible, horrible things like all of us dying these gruesome deaths! He made you suffer for months, Sonic!"

He expects more shouting, more angry looks, but all of the tensions slips from the hedgehog's face with a sudden hitch of the breath, and he freezes. Tails eyes him confusedly, before it hits him that they aren't walking anymore, which means they reached their destination, which means…

Tails turns to face forwards, finding himself before steel bars. Tucked into the shadows of the cell before them, in the deepest corner, an unsettling glow of mismatched eyes can be seen staring back at them.

"Shit."

Normally, Sonic would scold Tails for such vulgar language (no matter how hypocritical it may be at this point), but the hedgehog is currently too preoccupied gaping at the prisoner in the cell, the color drained from his azure face.

And really, Tails can't blame him—he's been reduced to a similar state.

The eyes are a bit daunting in their intense gaze. The left one is yellow, fiery and stubborn, and they had seen this eye before. But the other is blue, soft and wet, which neither of them had ever seen. It had been hidden by a jagged mask, one that was currently locked away somewhere by G.U.N.

For a while, no words are spoken, and both boys are just staring, because what else can they do? Eventually, the eyes lose any strength left in them, and they drop to the floor, crestfallen.

"Um," Sonic manages to push out of his clogged throat, because he's always been the one who hates silence. "I—uh. Hey."

If he weren't so ashamed at the moment, Tails would have laughed at the awkward jumble of words that just fell from the speedster's mouth.

There's silence for a few seconds, and it feels impossible to fill.

But suddenly, "I can't believe I thought this was going to work."

It's murmured and broken, and slightly shaky, like the speaker has been crying. It's a vague statement, but the brothers instantly realize what it means.

Sonic is stirred awake from his stupor, and he leans closer to the bars, eyes softening. "What? I—no, look, Infinite, we didn't—"

The figure in the shadows shifts uncomfortably at the name, and the cobalt warrior picks up almost immediately.

"Ah, right, sorry. Finn. We… Sorry, we didn't mean to freak you out, we're just…"

He looks at Tails desperately, and for a moment neither has words. It's evident just by their faces that Sonic feels nothing but guilt, even if he had been defending Finn, and Tails just feels plain awful. He hadn't meant to speak so horribly about the jackal, he just—

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean any of that. You… That wasn't you, y'know?" the pilot mutters.

There's no acknowledgement of the statement from the prisoner.

"You're free," Sonic says, with a vague smile, "It's time to go. C'mon."

"I really don't think I should," is the reply, monotone and sulky.

Infini—Finn's voice really is kind of beautiful. It doesn't sound like it did when he was under the Phantom Ruby's influence, not really, anyway. It's not quite as deep, not so warbled or sinister. It still teeters on the edge of bass and baritone, but it's silky and sweet and it just… It sounds raw, and human.

There's a struggle to maintain the smile, as Sonic squeezes a steel bar. "I think you should. We've worked way too hard for this, just for you to stay locked up in here. You deserve to see the sunlight again."

There's silence, and the jackal can be heard shifting around. "I hurt you," he says, dejectedly, "I hurt you and a lot of people. I can't… You proved me innocent to the law. But maybe not to the people."

"Then they'll just have to learn," Sonic says back, confidence resonating deeply with him now. "Because that guy… that thing that hurt me, and everyone else… It wasn't you."

Sonic steps back as a guard silently opens the door, before stepping back into the entrance of it and holding out a friendly hand. "Now stop sulking around and let's go. I think you'll like the workshop; it's over in Mystic Ruins. Real nice there. I think you'll like it."

Neither Sonic nor Tails can fight the grins that pull at their lips when they see Finn finally stand up, nervous, but ready.


It takes a little time to get settled, but the workshop is cozy and Sonic always smiles at him when he walks into a room and Tails always makes him hot cocoa because he told them it's his favorite and Chaos, what did he do to deserve this?

Finn can't help the warm, fuzzy feeling that's been nesting in his chest these past few days. He feels, for once, like he has friends, and a home, and he's not what he was.

As the morning Sunday skies creep over the horizon, the jackal shuffles into the kitchen, absentmindedly pulling his wild hair into a loose bun secured by chopsticks. He stretches a little, humming pleasantly as his bones creak and crack in a satisfying way.

Stomach practically dragging him to the pantry, Finn pulls open the door to see the various assortments of junk food and other items on the shelves. The entire top shelf is reserved for chilidog supplies, from cans of chili to bags of hotdog buns; the rest of the shelves carry anything from boxes of peppermints, to newly purchased hot cocoa mix, to stale cereal.

His hunger bites greedily at his insides, and the canine begrudgingly withdraws the latter item, pouring out the cereal into a bowl and munching lightly on the bits of oats and dried strawberries, not bothering to add milk.

Finn settles down into a stool at the bar, gaze wandering to the small mirror on top of the counter. He finds that he's been staring at his reflection a lot, lately; not out of vanity, but really just some subconscious gravitation. He thinks it must be how unadjusted he is to seeing his face again. Something about being under the Ruby's spell had sparked all of his insecurities awake; he had worn the mask to make himself feel powerful and confident, because he'd wanted to terrorize Mobius without deterring. Without having to doubt his humanity.

But now he's himself again. And, maybe it's just the way Sonic always seems to quietly remind him how much he should appreciate himself, but Finn always feel drawn to admire his real self, and remind himself that he's not a monster anymore.

Plucking another piece of cereal, Finn tosses it into his jaws, eyes glued to the mirror. He faintly traces the scar over his sky blue eye.

A yawn emerges from the entrance of the kitchen. "Mornin'!"

The heterochromatic jumps at the sudden exclamation, but quickly settles back into the morning calm. He turns to see a drowsy, chipper hedgehog beaming back at him.

"Hey," Finn replies, "Sleep well?"

Sonic sits beside him. "Yeah."

Finn knows this is as lie. Sonic hasn't been sleeping well since the war ended. Because all he has is nightmares that torture him enough to make him opt for no sleep at all. Because he'll be haunted forever by the hallucinations that the Phantom Ruby, that Infinite—no, dammit, that Finn had given him.

The canine realizes he's been staring at Sonic for a while, now. And, yeah, it was mostly at the eerily dark circles beneath his eyes, but his eyes were also just so captivating to look at. No matter how happy or upset, Sonic's eyes were always a gorgeous, verdant emerald.

The hedgehog is kind of staring back at him, too. His face looks really nice when it goes all slack, like that, and he gets really transfixed on something. Especially when that something is Finn.

They've been having these moments pretty frequently. Where it's quiet, but it's nice, and they just stare at each other. Finn's not really sure why it's been happening, but he sort of likes it.

Sonic startles from their staring contest first, clearing his throat. "Um."

Finn blinks. "Yeah. Uh. Want some cereal?"

The cerulean hero swallows thickly, lowers his gaze, and nods sharply. Finding himself a little mesmerized by the way Sonic's throat bobs, and his ears twitch, and his jaw works, it takes the jackal a moment to really register the action and scurry over to the box of cereal.

As Finn pours another bowl, this time with almond milk because he's only been here a week but they're already so close and he already knows that's the way Sonic likes his cereal, the hedgehog clears his throat again.

"Hey, so, uh," Sonic starts, hesitantly, "I was wondering if you'd be okay with, um. Going out today?"

The jackal pauses, and peers up. "Go out? Like, out? As in, Station Square, out?"

Sonic frowns at the distraught on Finn's face. "I know you're nervous, but it's a real quiet area in the city, and some other friends will be there. Amy invited us out for lunch."

"I think I'll pass on being publically hated by an entire city," Finn grouses, continuing to pour the cereal, but now with a bitter look on his face. "I get enough of that just from the local news."

This elicits a melancholy, sympathetic look from Sonic.

"It really won't be that bad," the speedster tries, "I swear. It's a super tiny restaurant, and the guy that runs it is super cool. It'll just be us, and Tails, and Amy, and Knux. Plus, maybe a few others."

This past week since he left prison, Finn has been secluded in the workshop with Sonic and Tails. And, don't get him wrong, it's been really nice. But he hasn't gone out in public once, and he hasn't even seen any of their friends once.

"It's a pretty big jump to go from social isolation to throwing me into one of the busiest cities in the country, you know."

Sonic sighs in resignation. "I know, I know, it's a lot to ask of you. But I just feel bad leaving you here alone. Surely you're getting sick of being locked up in here."

And then they freeze, for a moment. That terminology, 'locked up,' really doesn't settle well with either of them. Neither have good experiences with being imprisoned.

"Um," the hedgehog stammers, carding fingers through his quills as he tries to muster up anything he can say.

The bowl of freshly poured cereal is slid across the countertop to Sonic, as Finn crosses his arms defensively.

"I'm fine with staying."

"Finn."

"Really."

"Do you want to stay, though?"

The jackal's confidence wavers. "Well of course I don't want to stay. Of course I want to go outside, and enjoy the simple things like taking a walk, or getting groceries, or some shit. But I don't exactly have that luxury anymore, Sonic. I'm an outcast now."

Sonic rests his head on his hand, eyeing his breakfast as he toys with lifting a spoonful, before dropping it back into the bowl. "You don't have to be an outcast with us, y'know. We all care for you. We wanna help you."

"But that's just it," Finn says, "You want to help, because you're you. But nobody else does."

Sonic frowns. "Tails wants to help. Amy does. Even Knuckles does!" When a faint grin traces the canine's face, the hedgehog continues in a softer tone, "… Please, Finn. I promise we can come home if you want. You just say the word, and we'll be back in the blink of an eye. Literally."

And. Well. That was true, he supposed in defeat.


Before he knew it, Finn was getting dragged along by a certain hedgehog and fox to the outskirts of Station Square, where a small café resided. He could feel the heat rising in his face as he stepped inside, but luckily the few customers that were there were just on their way out, and barely noticed him. A chubby, old tiger (who must have been the nice owner of this place) waved them over, exchanged a greeting with Sonic, and sent them over to the huddle of Mobians in the corner who had to be their friends.

"Heya, guys!" Sonic greets, hands on his hips and chest puffed out.

Boisterous conversation coming to a halt, six Mobians (Amy, Knuckles, Silver, Rouge, and the Chaotix) all swivel around to face the newcomers with warm smiles and cheerful waves.

After a few seconds of rather chaotic greetings exchanged across everybody, the three take a seat—Finn safely between Sonic and Tails. The trio never specifically agreed on this arrangement before coming, but maybe they both can just read his mind.

Amy seems particularly hospitable, as she's the first to directly address the jackal. It's a little tentative, but she smiles and says, "Hi! Um, I don't think we ever properly met. I'm Amy Rose, but you can call me Amy."

He's too nervous to actually move his arms from his sides and shake her hand, so he just nods and flashes a glass smile.

Briefly, Sonic's gaze pierces the side of his skull, before the teenager blurts, "This is Finn, you guys."

A quiet, unison murmur of 'hello's washes over him, from the crowd all eyeing him uneasily.

You don't have to be an outcast with us.

Yeah. Right.

There's an uncomfortable silence, before the oblivious, jolly tiger strides over and places three glasses of water before the newest arrivals. He takes their orders, before hustling off to the kitchen and leaving the group alone.

Finn finds that he's studying them all. He discovers its particularly hard to look at Silver, but also just as difficult to not look. Because, no, the Ruby is gone, it's destroyed, but he can still vividly remember looking at Silver in the forest and wanting so badly to just strangle him with his bare hands, and watch his blood spill, because he was just another pest that was getting in the way, and he needed to be eliminated, needed to be killed—

Oh, Chaos, now Silver's staring back at him.

The jackal fidgets and his gaze snaps down to his lap, his face burning.

Nobody else seems aware of the silent exchange he just shared with the psychic, what with the small talk he can vaguely here behind the sharp ringing in his ears. But all Finn can think of now is his chest being on fire, because the Ruby is stabbing into him and sending tendrils of its power into his blood vessels, rocketing through his systems faster than he can breathe, his heartbeat's going into overdrive, all he can see is red and he can't—he… He can't…

Something tight and warm squeezes his wrist, and Finn takes a moment to register that its Sonic holding onto him. The hedgehog doesn't even look at him, just nonchalantly looks over the menu, chuckling at some joke Knuckles just made. Nobody can see the gesture, because their hands are under the table.

But Finn knows, and suddenly he can breathe again, because Sonic's touch is able to ground him enough to remind him that he's here, and it's now, and he's not there, and it's not then.

Plates of hot food are being placed onto the table now, and a few Mobians are cheering in delight and announcing just how starving they are. Either that tiger can cook really fast, or Finn didn't realize quite how long he'd been panicking.

He sighs shakily, swirling his spoon around in the bowl of soup before him, as he tunes back into the conversation.

Sonic sips at his soda. "So, where is the Shadster, Rouge?"

The bat smirks at the nickname for the brooding hedgehog. "Oh, you know him. Never one for social gatherings," she drawls, with a roll of her eyes, "He's too above that."

But that's not right, Finn thinks. Shadow's always been quiet and cold to their group, according to Sonic, but normally he tags along if Rouge shows up for whatever social gathering it may be. That can't be why he isn't here. Why isn't he here?

Oh, the jackal realizes, oh, of course. It's because he's here. Shadow must have know Sonic would be bringing him.

We all care for you. We all wanna help you.

Fuck. Oh, Chaos. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

He feels dizzy.

"I need to use the restroom," Finn hears himself saying, not even knowing if he just cut someone off, as he already feels himself standing up and shoving the chair away from himself. He thinks maybe he's going to be sick. Why did he even think this could go well? Why did he think he could be accepted?

He truly is a fool.

The heterochromatic walks briskly, his legs feeling heavy, and the world's tilting a little around him. He can distantly hear the crocodile guy—he can't even bother to remember his name—murmur something along the lines of 'is that guy okay?' But he's not, he's so not okay, he needs to go home, they want to hurt him because he hurt them and oh, Chaos, he's a monster, he's such a goddamn monster.

Suddenly he's before the bathroom sink.

Finn looks at himself in the mirror, and his face looks completely blank, his eyes are sunken and foggy with distraught. And for the first time in a week, he doesn't admire how he looks, free from the mask. He wishes he could put it back on. At least when the Ruby was controlling him—at least when he was Infinite—he accepted that he was a monster.

He blinks, and a tear falls from each eye, fast and heavy.

A hand rests on his shoulder, and Finn jumps, gasping and wheezing and lip quivering. He can sort of recognize a cerulean figure beside him, and they're saying something to him, but everything sounds slurred and muffled and far away.

He's sitting on the floor, now, and the blue figure is coming more into focus, their voice more distinct.

"… Hey, hey, Finn? Breathe, okay? I'm right here, just calm down. It's okay."

It's Sonic, and he looks horrified.

"I'm sorry," the jackal whispers, because it's all he can say. And of course it won't make up for anything. Nothing he can do will ever make up for what he did. Nothing.

He's shaking.

"What?" the hedgehog cocks his head, and he looks genuinely confused.

"I'm sorry."

Sonic looks at him for a moment, at a loss for words. This is it. He's realizing how horrible he is. Sonic's going to leave him. He's going to go back to prison. He couldn't live under the illusion of happiness forever. He doesn't deserve it. He's a monster, he can't—

Sonic hugs him.

Oh.

"Chaos, Finn, you don't…" the hedgehog murmurs into his ear, "Don't apologize. It's okay. You didn't do anything wrong."

No. He did. He's a monster. "I hurt… I was hurting, and I… I hurt everybody else… I hurt…"

Sonic squeezes him tightly. "No, just stop. Don't talk anymore. That was the Phantom Ruby. Not you. You're a victim of all of this, just like the rest of us. Don't ever tell yourself this was your fault."

Finn's eyes flutter shut, because Sonic's just so warm and soft, and his words caress his pounding head.

"This wasn't your fault."


At some point, they'd both ended up sleeping in the same bed.

Finn thinks it started around the first time Sonic woke up, screaming.

Tails hadn't been home—the Cottontails invited him to stay the night, as he'd been helping Vanilla fix her leaky sink. Sonic had spent the afternoon there, as well, but he came home to have dinner with the jackal, no doubt guilty about leaving him alone. Finn was still tentative about leaving the house, ever since the lunch incident.

And they'd both gone to bed at some point, the jackal in Sonic's room and the hedgehog on the couch, because, of course the hedgehog let him take the bed. It had been a pretty normal night.

Until Finn lurched awake at the sound of a cry slicing through the air. He'd leapt from the bed, his bun in more disarray than usual, and darted over to the lounge area to see a trembling blue figure sitting on the couch.

Sonic's eyes were wide and glossy, he quivered like a leaf, and he had a faraway look in his haunted gaze. He was sitting up straight, blanket a wadded up mess on his lap, gasping for breath like he'd been drowning.

"Sonic," Finn had whispered, slowly inching around the edge of the couch, to hopefully not alarm the hero any more than he needed to, "Sonic, are you alright?"

The hedgehog took a shaky, deep breath, and it took him a moment to fix his gaze on the tired canine. Then, he blinked, and nodded vehemently, as if that'd convince the other that he was perfectly okay. He very clearly wasn't.

A little nervously, Finn sat by the teenager's feet, scrunching up his eyes in concern as he studied his companion's face. "It was just a dream, alright?" he'd murmured, lightly squeezing a blue ankle.

The speedster blinked rapidly at the tears brimming in his eyes. "… I… I thought… Everything was so hot, and—and bright, and loud, and I… Eggman was… The ruby…"

And, oh, fuck. Finn visibly grimaced, trying to ignore the last bit. Trying to ignore how utterly terrified Sonic looked when he said that word. "Listen to me," the jackal had said, with a lot of practice too, as this wasn't the first time Sonic had had a nightmare (although, apparently, it was one of the most intense ones yet). "We're back home, now. You're on the couch, in the workshop. I'm here, and everyone else is at their homes, sleeping. The w… Everything's over. You're safe."

The heavy, quick breaths had mellowed out. Sonic nodded, after a second.

"You gonna be okay?" Finn asked, "You need some water?"

The cerulean male carded trembling fingers through his quills, and he leaned back on his pillow. "Um," he'd cleared his throat, "Yeah, that'd be nice."

The beverage was promptly retrieved by the jackal, and then promptly chugged by the hedgehog.

"I'm, uh," said the heterochromatic, "I think I'm going to try and sleep. Just holler if you need me."

"Wait," Sonic began, his voice still hoarse and his eyes still watery, "Can… Can I stay with you tonight?"

An utterly betraying smile pulled at his lips, and Finn had held out a hand to the warrior.

"Sure."

After that, they'd occasionally repeat the process in similar incidents. Eventually, though, it got to the point where they both just decided to move into Sonic's room. And it really wasn't all that weird. They didn't… Do things. It was just—it's nice to have someone there, is all.

And yet, one night, Sonic finds himself deeper in his nightmares than before. His vision's dark and hazy, and the iron bars all around him feel so cold, there's syringes digging into his skin and knuckles colliding into bones and it's all so, so painfully red. A figure looms over his pathetic, quaking, bleeding form, cackling at him, it's eyes twisted in some sick amusement as it raises it's claws and—

"Get off me!"

Sonic throws out his fist at whatever thing is grabbing at him, everything's too dark now, not really red anymore, but he leaps away anyway. Suddenly butterflies swirl around in his stomach, and he's plummeting for a split second before he meets the ground again, cruel and stiff against his head.

"Ah," the hedgehog hisses, caressing the back of his skull as he sits up, blinking wearily, "W-what—? Where—"

Somebody, a nervous figure, peaks over the edge of whatever he'd just fallen from, just a few feet away. He tries to recognize them, but then he sees those eyes and he knows, he knows he needs to get away, the ruby's so bright and hot and it's power is burning into him, branding on his fur like he's worth nothing, sending flares of agony ricocheting around his insides, ramming into him like a bull, knocking the wind right out of him and he can't breathe, he can't breathe, he can't—

—The figure's stalking up to him now, and he can feel its gaze, relentless and sharp, analyzing him carefully, planning. It kneels down, close, in front of him, and a clawed hand extends up to his face—

"Don't touch me!" he cries out, flinching away, "Please, just don't—I don't—"

Now the figure lurches away, withdraws instantly. Finally, the horrible pressure against Sonic's ears starts to let up. His vision becomes a little less blotchy.

"Shit, oh, Chaos, fuck. I didn't mean to—oh my Chaos, I'm so sorry, I…"

The voice is so soft, intimate in such away it send chills down Sonic's spine. What…? What the hell is happening, how did…?

The outline of a bed comes into view, through the dark of the night. The figure across from him leans against the side of the furniture, cupping a hand over his mouth and staring at him with wide, yellow and blue eyes. He looks… horrified? Revolted?

And, with a heavy groan and a few more blinks, the buzz starts to fade from Sonic's head. "… Finn?"

The jackal is silent a moment, before he whispers, "I'm so sorry."

Sonic sits up slightly, rubbing his head. "Fuck, I don't… I thought—"

"You thought I was going to hurt you."

"No!" the hedgehog exclaims, leaning forward, "I thought—I thought I was back there."

The other male looks utterly empty. "Back where I hurt you."

"Finn—"

"No. Shut up," the canine snarls. He digs his fingers into his hair, tears welling up in his mismatched eyes. "Don't fucking tell me that wasn't me. Because it was. Those were my hands that beat you senseless. My powers that tortured you. I vividly remember how much I loved watching you suffer. I remember laughing when you'd cry out for Tails and Knuckles. I hurt you. I hurt you and I loved it."

And then there's silence, aside from the jackal's heavy, trembling breathing that fills the room. Sonic's eyes are wide and wet, and he's shaking his head distantly but Finn can't help think he knows it's true. He can't lie to himself forever.

"Fuck, I—" the heterochromatic stands up suddenly, looking around frantically before heading to the door. "I need to leave, I can't—I can't do this anymore."

"Finn!"

The door slams shut. And Sonic's left alone on the floor, still crying from his nightmare, still crying because he's a mess and he ruined everything and he—

Dammit.


"Finn, wait!"

The jackal doesn't even stir. He can't stop the way he trembles, his fists balled up so tight his fingers feel cold, and his face is soaked from tears. His back is to the workshop, hair bristling slightly from the moonlight breeze. He can hear footsteps rapidly approaching, but he refuses to turn around and look.

"Just—please, Sonic," he says, and he doesn't think he's ever sounded so completely destroyed as he does now, "I don't—I can't stay here anymore."

A hand grabs his bicep, catching his attention subconsciously. Shattered gold and sapphire meets shimmering emeralds.

"You have to," the hedgehog whispers, because it's all he can manage, any louder and he'll lose it. "You have to. You can't—don't leave."

"But you hate me," Finn sobs, biting his lip, "I know you do."

"C'mon, you know I don't—"

"But you do. I nearly destroyed the world as we know it. I tortured you for months. I—I killed hundreds of the very people you try to protect."

Something foreign flashes through Sonic's eyes, something Finn can't recognize.

"Shut the hell up."

The canine startles a little at the change in mood. "… What?"

Sonic grabs his shoulders, eyes drowning in brimming tears. He laughs wetly. "I said shut the hell up. Because you have it so wrong. I don't hate you. I hate what Eggman did to you, what the ruby did to you. Finn, I love you."

Completely star struck, Finn isn't really prepared when they suddenly lock lips, tender fingers snaking up behind his head and running through his ivory hair. He tries to return the gesture, shaking hands sliding around the hedgehog's waist and pulling him closer, because, fuck, he's wanted this for so long. The strong hands pull his head in closer, their lips in an intense match, gasping into each other, tongues barely teasing each other.

Then Sonic pulls away, breathing heavy, cheeks hot and red. "I love you," he echoes, a soft smile tracing at his face.

The jackal flounders a moment to find any words, completely frozen. "I, uh. I love you, too."

Laughter pierces through the night, and the hedgehog leans into Finn, burrowing his face into thick chest fur.

"I know, idiot."


hhh so there it is? hope you like it. i rly rly lov supportive bf sonic soooo yeah :)

also finn with a manbun? 12/10 would recommend.

uhhh so i'm prolly gonna go silent for a while unless i get sidetracked again and write another lil oneshot like this one. i'm planning my first big multichap fic so ! it's gonna be a wild ride !

please r&r, it's greatly appreciated!