Jonathan of Conte smiled to himself, amused that every time he had troubles he came here of a places. The portrait gallery of the palace was at the moment unoccupied by visiting nobles and servants. Of course it would be, Jon mused to himself, Tortall is at war why would anyone waste time on old paintings and old memories?He walked leisurely through the gallery, watching as the Kings and Queens of past stared down at him. Finally he came to rest before his parents, King Roald and Queen Lianne of Conte. Jon looked up, staring into the once familiar eyes of his father. A man who kept this country whole without war and famine, Jon thought.
All the stars watch over you,
Night and day
When you can't stop turning
Where'd you go mysterious?
So ashamed....
You've lost the way again
All the stars watch over you, he remembered his father saying when he was a young child. "Night and day," Jon finished out loud. He didn't feel watched over, he felt alone. I'm so ashamed, he thought, Tortall is in her third war and I have yet to even enter the end of my reign. I suppose I've lost the way again.
When did we all start
Living a world in a photograph?
Where I'll find you
Waiting for something
Hiding in places, the shapes of the faces
In photographs
When the dreams are done
Look how the tears run...
Through my eyes
"How did you do it?" Jon asked the painting. His head ached with all that had been going on. The endless councils and meetings would drive him mad soon if he had no break. The fact that the Gods cursed Scanrans were driving his people from their homes while he sat in a stuffy room made him feel useless. Not to mention the war was costing the Crown funding it didn't have, as well as sleep Jon should be getting. Stupid war, he thought to himself, stupid me as well. I can't even go ten years without another one starting. Jon looked down, rubbing his hand through his hair, only to look buck up again. He stared hard at the painting as if his father would start to come alive and share with him some sort of wisdom that would get him out of this mess.
You danced upon the mirror glass
On the floor...
When the sky was falling
Where'd you go my curious?
Insecure....
You've lost my way again
"Somehow you managed to fix everything when the sky was falling. I feel like the sky is falling," he confessed for the first time "please, help me fix it!" Jon felt so insecure. He felt like this with every war, calm and collected on the outside, but in utter turmoil on the inside. He should have seen the warning signs all along. The more frequent raids, the sightings of Scanrans getting closer to the border, even King Maggot slowly coming to power. It was his entire fault. He is the ruler of Tortall, and he felt like a horrible tyrant.
When did we all start
Living a world in a photograph?
Where I'll find you
Waiting for something
Hiding in places, the shapes of the faces
In photographs
When the dreams are done
Look how the tears run...
Through my eyes
"Father I tried so hard!" he confessed. He stared at the painting harder, searching for a clue that could end this battle inside him.
Once went through my head
Once was in my head;
I'm waiting
He clutched his head, trying not to scream out his frustration. He couldn't see how he could stop this. His people were dying, and he could do nothing but sit and argue with the war council. How did the past Kings bring peace? he wondered for the thousandth time. And why can't I figure it out?
I'm waiting to go again
Once went through my head
What once was in my head
Is through my eyes
A hand clutched his shoulder, waking him from his torment. "Jon?" Thayet's voice washed over him like cool water over the fire he felt inside.
"How did you find me?" he asked.
"You come here when you're upset, and I could tell at the last meeting that something was bothering you."
"How did he do it, Thayet? How did my father keep peace for so long when I can't even…" he let the sentence fall, unsure of how to put what he felt into words.
Laying a gentle hand on his arm she turned him towards her. "You're father was never perfect, you know that."
"But he accomplished what I can't achieve!"
Thayet pulled him towards her, wrapping him in a gentle embrace. "You can't change the world, Jon. You've done a fantastic job with what you have. You've changed things and the world isn't ready, and everyone just wants to punish you for it. You're fighting for what is right and you're doing the best that you can, which is more than most people could do. Everything will turn out alright in due time just believe in yourself, and have faith in your people."
Jon sighed. "I know you're right its just that I sometimes feel like I could be doing more elsewhere."
"You're doing an important job. Just think if you weren't here to make sure Duke Gabrith of Gallswall was in check we would already have lost the war."
A small smile appeared across Jon's face. "Yes, if it was up to him all our forces would be on a goose chase through Scanra."
Thayet took his hand and started to pull him towards the doors. "Well come on then. We can't live in a world in a painting. Next time Jon, don't go into hiding around faces in paintings, come and talk to me."
Jon stopped for a moment, looking back at his father, and then continued forwards toward his wife. No, we can't live a world in a painting.
AN: Jon always seems to be the blunt of jokes, and seen as a "bad" person. I don't really see him as a horrible person, just misunderstood. I thought he needed a little boost in the fan-fiction world.
