This fic idea was sent to me by a fellow Sebastian lover, and I could not refuse.

Disclaimer: I do not own Dragon Age. I am merely borrowing their characters and some of their dialogue.

Warning: This is rated M, in case you have not yet seen. If you are under age, or if that bothers you, I suggest you find something else.


Isabela was frustrated, to say the least.

Perhaps frustrated was the wrong word; she was maddened by the frustration surrounding her.

Ugh. There it was again, bloody Hawke rubbing off on her. Since when did she give a rat's arse about other people's lives?

Since bloody Hawke.

But she supposed her longing to help her fearless leader might be a selfish one, and the thought brought her some comfort. When Hawke was upset, everyone was upset. And when everyone was upset, people were stabbed, wars started, and suddenly Isabela was sailing back with a priceless relic. Without selling it first!

Don't get her wrong, Isabela loved the occasional stabbing. But Hawke's raging magic stabbing was a bit... extreme.

Suffice to say, do not screw with the Champion. This rule made Isabela somewhat sad. Hawke was such a pretty little thing, and screwing was one of her favorite things to do.

But back to the problem at hand.

Hawke was miserable these days, quite the change from when Isabela first met her. Hawke had been a tough, deadly woman; she still was. But before, she was always so happy, so alive, so ready to help. She was humorous and silly, and Isabela had adored that. But she seemed... less into it now. The spark of mischief was gone from her eyes, the thing that had attracted her many friends. She made fewer jokes, fewer sarcastic quips. Helping people just didn't lift her spirits the way it had before.

Before her mother died.

But that wasn't the problem and Isabela knew it. The problem was that sodding archer. Sebastian Vael. Those two couldn't meet each other's eyes for more than two bloody seconds.

Though she had to admit, Hawke did have nice taste. That Chantry boy had quite the delicious backside. But that didn't change the fact that Hawke hadn't dared to approach him and tell him, or better yet, just mount him already.

For such a brave woman, Hawke was as meek as a mouse when it came to things like this. 'Romantic things'. The one time Isabela had asked about the doe-eyed looks she kept shooting him, she had met her gaze with tired eyes and said, "He won't break his vows; not for me, not for anyone. And I won't make him feel guilty or conflicted by telling him of my feelings."

Sodding morality.

But damn her to the Void if Isabela didn't recognize how Sebastian's gaze wandered over Hawke's form when he knew she wasn't looking. Isabela knew what men were thinking when they made those eyes at a woman (or man, or whatever tickled their fancy). Even if they were too cowardly to admit it.

And this was precisely why Isabela had to step in. To make both of them see how idiotic they were being so they could either address it and put it behind them (which didn't sound nearly as fun) or ravage each other already!

It would be a challenge, she knew, to get Prince Vael to break those irritating vows. But Hawke's future happiness (and her future sex life) depended on it! And the pirate queen never backed down from a challenge.