So, first story on this pen name, and first story in awhile. Enjoy! (Next will be longer, I promise!)
"Kurt, I really can't be in a committed relationship right now." Watching the boy who holds my heart face fall was just about the hardest thing to ever see.
"I'm sorry, Kurt, I just can't do this." And I walked away. What else can I do? He does want to deal with all of my problems, he would have no idea what he was getting into. There is just no physical way I could ever be with him.
Slowly, making my way out of our park, the park where we shared are first kiss, I heard just the faintest sob. I stopped right there. What else could I do? I wanted to kick myself and vomit at the same time. My heart was urging me, TURN AROUND. MAN UP AND TURN AROUND. Sadly, my head retorted KEEP GOING. YOU'LL HURT HIM MORE IF YOU STAY WITH HIM. Wishing I had listened to my heart instead of my head, I put my hands in my coat, getting colder by the second, and continued my walk back to the common room.
Then, my final warning that this was not the right way to do this, it began to snow. I just wanted to drop down to my knees and cry out right then. Snow. My first memory of snow with Kurt was when he first told me he loved me. And what did I do? I smiled and said, "You too." I couldn't even say the word. Love. L-O-V-E. Kurt, I LOVE you. You make me happier than I have ever been in my entire life. When I see you all my problems melt away. But, no. All I did was smile and half-assed a response. For weeks and weeks, I continued to lead him on, saying "You too," and pulling him in for a hug, not ending it then and there. Finally, my guilt couldn't take it anymore and I had to end it. So, this snow, this stupid freaking snow, is just another reminder of the one that didn't get away, the one that I forced out of my life and wouldn't look back.
I, Blaine, had just broken the heart of the only person I truly loved.
