Authors Note: THIS WILL BE A SLASH STORY! REPEAT: THIS WILL BE SLASH! If you don't like it, don't read ahead :)
I always, write angst/tragedy. The only thing close to another Genre was a one-shot I wrote a while ago which was very family.
I also have never written a chapter story, so bare with me.
Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh GX or any of the characters in this chapter.
Warnings: Slash/Yaoi/boyxboy. Eating disorders. Self-harm. Suicidal thoughts.
Shining sapphire hair, Emerald eyes that gleamed with life and excitement, all of that was now a memory to Judai. He missed the owner of those brilliant features. The chiselled jaw line and smooth skin still remained deep in his memory. Johan. He had left on the 24th of September 2009, just over a year ago, to work aboard, but left a heartbroken Judai behind.
He guessed Johan was happy now, studying in England, While Judai had just finished his last year of college. He didn't want to work, he didn't have the skills. Or the mental health. He just wanted his Johan back. HIS Johan, not Yubel's.
Judai walked through his flat door, locking it behind him and throwing himself onto the bed, laying his arm over his face. Throwing a pillow onto his answer machine, he half listened to the automated voice.
"You have 27 new messages. First message received at 4:27pm" Asuka's voice rang through the speaker sounding worried and frantic. "Judai! Pick up the phone now! You can't just stay cooped up in a flat for the rest of your life! Johan is gone now! Get used to it! Come out with us for once! Please..."
Judai sighed, Asuka never gave up. The rest of the messages were nearly the same, from Sho, Edo, Ryo, Manjoume, Kenzan, Rei, Daichi and Fubuki (forgive me I don't usually use the Japanese names!), but one in particular caught his attention.
"Judai! I'm coming home! Clear space for me! I'll be home on the 28th! I just couldn't stay away! IM me buddy! You're never online anymore!"
It was his voice, Johan's voice; He was coming home, coming back to Judai. For once since Johan left, Judai was full of hope, he'd finally be able to tell him how he's felt all these years since he first arrived in their 3rd year.
He got off the bed and replayed the message over and over; He'd missed that voice, so much.
The 28th... He looked at his calendar. It was the 23rd, in 5 days he would see his Johan again, and, for the first time in months, the corner of his lips lifted, a small smile gracing his face. He went to his laptop, and signed in.
ElementJUDAI6612 has signed in
cRyStAlDuDe: JUDAI!
ElementJUDAI6612: Hey Johan...
cRyStAlDuDe: What's wrong buddy?
ElementJUDAI6612: nothing...it doesn't matter anymore Johan
cRyStAlDuDe: Aww you've not gone all depressed on me have you?
ElementJUDAI6612: No... I can't wait to see you again Johan-kun
cRyStAlDuDe: Hehe :D I can't wait to see you again either Ju-chan!
ElementJUDAI6612: CHAN?
cRyStAlDuDe: YAY! There's the Judai I know!
ElementJUDAI6612: Johan! / Don't do that!
cRyStAlDuDe: Seriously now though Judai, Asuka's been telling me what you've been doing...I don't agree with it you know
Judai paled
ElementJUDAI6612: What do you mean?
cRyStAlDuDe: What you've been doing since I left.
Oh No... Judai thought to himself. Asuka told him! She promised not to!
FLASH BACK!
Judai lent over the toilet, throwing up the contents of his stomach after shoving 2 fingers down his throat, blood pouring onto the white tiled floor from deep cuts in his wrists. It's been 4 months since Johan left for school aboard, and Judai was going crazy, Johan was everywhere, he would see his face in the soup at lunch and the milk at breakfast, every lamp post and duel card. It made him feel like he was living in a dream, like nothing was real, and he wanted more then anything to feel alive again. Doing this made him feel human and awake. The blood loss from his wrists was starting to get to him, black spots creeping into his vision. He was so out of it he didn't hear the front door of his apartment swing open or the soft voice calling his name. He just saw the blonde hair of his friend Asuka before he fainted.
He awoke several hours later in the familiar infirmary. Squinting at the brightness of the white room, he slowly sat up.
"Judai!" He heard someone to his left shout in a mixture of happiness and shock. He blinked his eyes to focus them. Eventually when his eyes got used to the light, he could see Asuka sat by his bed in her light green pyjamas.
"Judai how could you do such a thing to yourself?" She cried to him.
He looked down at his abnormally small stomach and bandaged wrists, the bandages were makeshift and messy, showing that he hadn't been seen by a proper nurse yet.
"Asuka...I..." "Is this about Johan again?"
Judai silenced, she could read him like a book.
"...Don't tell anyone Asuka...please...?"
"I won't Judai...but please stop..."
"I-" Judai started to counter.
"You know what? Forget it!" Asuka ran out , hiding her teary eyed face.
"Asuka..." Judai got up from the white bed and left the room.
FLASHBACK END
ElementJUDAI6612: Johan? What did she tell you?
cRyStAlDuDe: That you...
Judai waited a few minutes for Johan's reply
cRyStAlDuDe: YOU STOPPED DUELING? WTF JUDAI?
ElementJUDAI6612: heh heh... Yeah sorry ^.^
cRyStAlDuDe: D:
ElementJUDAI6612: I said I'm sorry
cRyStAlDuDe: Ok ok ¬¬
ElementJUDAI6612: :(
cRyStAlDuDe: ¬¬
ElementJUDAI6612: sooooo...
cRyStAlDuDe: yeahhh...you looking forward to me visiting?
ElementJUDAI6612: NO!
cRyStAlDuDe: what? O.o
ElementJUDAI6612: Of course you idiot! ¬¬"
cRyStAlDuDe: Yayyyy ^.^ Duel me when I get there?
ElementJUDAI6612: Sure I guess I might be a little rusty though
cRyStAlDuDe: All the better :) ill kick your ass
ElementJUDAI6612: NUUUUUUU
Judai couldn't believe how much better he felt already, his heart didn't hurt and he felt like a hole had been filled. He felt as though he could eat without feeling disgusting.
cRyStAlDuDe: Ne J I'm sorry but I gotta go now, gotta pack ^^"
Everything Judai has felt vanished in an instant, the hole was back and he wasn't hungry. He could feel his eyes burning as he wanted to cry.
ElementJUDAI6612: ok Johan J see you on the 28th
cRyStAlDuDe: Byeeeeee
Judai closed the lid of his laptop and lay back on his bed. Staring up at the cream ceiling.
Just 5 days, that's all he'd have to wait. Just 5 days. He lay there for a while, wondering where Johan would be staying, how long he'd be there, weather he has a girlfriend.
Before he knew it, his alarm clock read 3am.
'I better get some sleep' he thought to himself. But minutes after he'd changed as his head had hit the pillow, a knock rapped on the door.
Judai groaned tiredly and stood up, opening the door. He paled considerably.
"Hello Judai." Rang a voice, he had once wished he'd never heard again.
Authors note: So? How was it? I started writing this back in September...but I lost interest. I found it again today while cleaning out my Story folder, and decided to carry on and finish this chapter. Depending on the feedback I get will decide if I carry on with it or not :)
Constrictive criticism is accepted! But flamers will die, cappesh? This will be a Yaoi/Slash/BoyxBoy story, and if you don't like that I suggest you don't carry on reading if I do decide to carry on with it.
Should it be Longer? Shorter? More Detail? Less Detail? Any feedback or questions! :D
