The Beginning of the List


In the land of Hyrule, there are people.

Obviously.

Since these people exist, so too does their history. And interestingly, their history is riddled with various successful and unsuccessful takeovers by various men, usually named Ganon or some variation thereof.

The first thing one might think, upon seeing this history, would be, 'Why are they all named the same thing? Were all their mothers just vastly uncreative, looked in a history book for ideas, and thought, 'That sounds good' and just went with it because it was the first name they saw? Seriously, what the Din?'

However, if you are a certain boy named Link, you look at this history and think, 'How were all of these men so incredibly stupid? If I ever became an evil overlord, I'd do things differently,' and you go make a list of all the things you'd do.

This is that list.

So welcome, reader, to The Top 100 Things I'd Do If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord. There will be laughs. There will be stupidity. There will be times you suspect the author might have run out of ideas. And lastly, there will be Peahats. Lots and lots of Peahats.

Read on.


Disclaimer: This Evil Overlord List is Copyright 1996-1997 by Peter Anspach. If you enjoy it, feel free to pass it along or post it anywhere, provided that (1) it is not altered in any way, and (2) this copyright notice is attached.

I'm putting this here so I don't have to tagline it after every chapter. All you need to know is I didn't come up with these myself, I just got inspired after reading them and wanted to share them because I thought it was funny. This Peter Anspach guy is a comedic genius.