The scene starts out in the Central Perk, Ross plops on the couch next to his friends.
Ross:
Ugh, I've had the worst day at work!
Chandler: Dinosaurs still
dead?
Rachel: Aww, what happened?
Ross: Some dull forensic anthropologist-author is coming to observe the way I lecture because no one ever goes to hers because they're so boring. I have to take her on a tour of Manhattan and let her stay in my apartment with me.
Monica: Oh, and your lectures are just so exciting?
Ross: I've never heard of her, but everyone says she's so dull!
Monica: Well, what does she do?
Joey: Duh, she gives lectures!
Chandler: Joe, I think she means her real job.
Joey: Oh. Well is she hot?
Phoebe: Joey!
Joey: What?
Ross: I don't know. She's probably some old lady with a briefcase and everything.
Chandler: Don't you have a briefcase?
Monica: Don't you?
Rachel: Well, maybe it won't be that bad. Who is she?
Ross: Dr. Temperance Brennan.
Joey: Wait, Ross; an author writes stuff, right?
Ross: What else would she do?
Joey: I don't know. What a fornoseic arthropod?
Ross: You mean forensic anthropologist?
Joey: That's what I said!
Ross: She studies human bones. That's gotta be the dullest thing thing ever!
Chander: And looking at animal bones is so much more fun?
Ross: I don't just study dinosaur bones, I examine fossils too.
Chandler: So, rocks are better than bones.
Ross: Human bones.
Phoebe: So, when is she coming?
Ross: The professors told me she's driving here today from DC. She should be here by tonight.
Rachel: Does she know where to go?
Ross: I have to hang here and wait.
Chandler: Good luck with that!
They all get up and leave, leaving Ross alone
The sun has set and Ross is the only one left in the coffeehouse. Booth and Brennan walk in holding a bunch of suitcases.
Brennan: Booth, you didn't have to come with me; I've been to New York plenty of times before.
Booth: I know, Bones, but I wanted to come. You know… just in case.
Brennan: In case of what?
Booth: I don't know. I'm tired lets just find this Ross guy and get the hell outa here.
Brennan: Dr. Geller?
Ross stands up and heads to Booth and Brennan.
Ross: Yeah!?
Brennan: Hello my name is Dr. Temperance Brennan-
Ross: Oh my god. Wow.
Brennan: -and this is my partner, Agent Seeley Booth.
Booth: Special Agent.
Ross: Um, hi. I'm Dr. Ross Geller, um… uh…
Brennan: I apologize for the last minute company, Dr. Geller.
Booth: Oh, so I'm last minute company, now?
Ross: Its fine, uh… you can, um, call me Ross. Well, should we head back to my place? Oh, crap. I didn't mean to sound like I wanted to seduce you- not that I want to, or anything, because you are obviously with Agent Booth, oh god, Ross, shut up!
Brennan: What?
Booth: No, no, no, no! Bones and I are not-
Brennan: We are not in a sexual relationship, we are completely platonic.
Booth: Completely platonic.
Ross: Oh, well then-
Booth: But she's not interested.
Brennan: Booth, let me speak for myself!
Booth: What are you saying you want to have sex with his looser?
Brennan: I'm not saying-
Ross: I don't mean to interrupt, but Gunther is about to close and…
Brennan: Yes, I agree, we should leave. It's late and Booth is indirectly sending signals implying that he needs a REM cycle.
Booth: Huh?
Brennan: You're tired.
Ross: Okay then. So I'll grab a cab and you guys can unpack at my place and I'll sleep on the couch while you can work something out in my room (where I haven't had sex for like 3 months). Not that I was going to do it while you're here; I'll find fun another way- oh god. I wasn't implying I would play with myself or anything, I meant like I puzzle, I would drink a beer and do a puzzle!
Brennan: I like puzzles.
Ross: Good, then we can do it together!
Booth: It?
Brennan: I believe he means we can do the puzzle together.
Ross: Yeah, the puzzle.
Booth: Alright, lets just get the hell outa here and get some sleep!
