Then, it had been then

Then, it had been then. Now, it was now.

Strange how life really is, isn't it? One minute you're in love, the next you're not.

Or one minute you and your girlfriend are madly in love, and then she dumps you and you still love her. And you're heartbroken because she doesn't want you back.

That's how it was with me. My astonishingly beautiful ex-girlfriend, Fawn, had dumped me for spending time with Tricky. What was wrong with spending time with my horse on her birthday?

True, that was a bit weird. But I loved Tricky. She was part of my life, part of me.

I had been tossing up the stupid deer stuffed animal up and down, up and down. Imagining kissing Fawn… dancing with Fawn… hugging Fawn… back then…

Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!

Suddenly, my little 7th-grade sister banged on my door. Someone was with her. I could feel it. Layne was whispering to someone, and then spoke aloud. "A special girl's here to see you!" she yelled.

Fawn? She was here? I bolted to my feet and yanked open the door. Oh. Shithead. It was just Massie Block. Asshole. Like Fawn would be here a week after breaking up with me.

Later, as I look back, I realize: Just Massie Block? No. She had gotten me out of my depression, helped me get rid of my feelings for Fawn. And I liked her. But, how little I knew about her! She had a boyfriend. She was setting me up with Skye, being matchmaker. That backfired. I fell for her instead, not Skye.

And then, at Skye's party, she blasted Too Little, Too Late by Jojo, sending me back to my hidey-hole, my safe place to hide when I was depressed.

She was special. And she used to be Derrick Harrington's boyfriend. I loved Fawn then. I didn't love Massie then, but I really, really liked her. And now, twenty years later, I can't believe I was actually like that.

I roll out of bed and stumble into my four-year-old daughter, Missy. "Daddy!" she giggles, holding her arms out to me.

I shoo her back to her room and check on my two-year-old son, Danny. He is sleeping, safe and sound, in his crib.

I whirl around as someone tackles me from behind. "Shit. I nearly had a heart attack!" I exclaim.

My wife giggles. "I guess I'm still like a seventh grader." She smiles and hugs me again. She is no longer like that uptight, confident girl she used to be. She has loosened up, but not so much.

My wife. My beautiful, devoted, adoring thirty-two year old wife. With her beautiful bark-brown hair with caramel and blond highlights, sharp amber eyes, and size 0 body, she looks like a model. And she is one, and is my comfort toy.

"I love you, Chris." She snuggles into my waiting arms, breathing deeply.

"I love you too… Massie."


It's bad, isn't it? I know. I wrote this at 9:40-10:05 PM. I should be going, now. R&R, please! I need to know how bad this is!

Seahorse