Sacred Groves

I always sit here, when I want to be alone. It's a nice place; I can see the ocean from here. I can hear the gulls call out to each other. I can hear the waves that tirelessly push against the land. I love the water; there are so many colours embedded into it. Reds from the flowers, yellow and white from the sun, darker colours from shadows and beautiful shades of blue that move so magically. There are children splashing and swimming in the water. I have no desire to join them. I fear the water.

There has never been an explanation to my fears. I love and fear it. I can never tear myself away from the water; it has always been apart of me. Once, the mother tried to convince me that my fear was not of water but of drowning. But, in my heart, I know this is not true. Even as I sit here, by myself, I stare out in to the water's cool depths. There are no words to describe the longing and affection that I feel. Seeing the water, comforts me. It makes me feel like there is someone out there waiting for me. Waiting for me to come into its arms and rock me, back and forth, like the waves.

I gently stroked the wooden bench beneath me, as I tried to remember why I had escaped the house to come to a place like this. I was barely 6 years old when I found this place. I had run away from the house one day. I could not remember why. But something pulled me to this place. It's a little grove behind the house and is very close to the ocean. When I was here, there was a small bench and few large boulders to sit on. But now, there is a larger bench and a hidden bookshelf embedded into the trees. The path to my sacred grove is worn. But I never cared to hide it. The family never cared about me anyway.

I feel so different when I am around people. It feels as if I am the only who is different. It seems that I am the only one who cares about the "small" things. The sisters always bug me about ways to change myself. How I should apply makeup. What clothes I should wear…and so on. But most of the time, they do not talk to me. The family is full of noise, but none of that concerns me. They argue and fight over things. There is never calm and peace in the house.

I escape from the family and the house to come to my grove. The grove is my home. Your home should never make you feel sad, alone and angry every time you step through the doorstep. A home must make you feel accepted and welcomed, it should make you feel safe and give you a sense of familiarity. Some people have many homes; some have none.

I am blessed, to be able to find a home, before I had completely lost my other. I am blessed to find another home, the ocean. I fear it, because I love it. I fear that it might not want me. The ocean has so much, why would it accept me, into its pathways? But somewhere in my heart, I know that it will. Because for something so great to be made, there must be a foundation. There must be rain, rivers and streams. There must to be snow, lakes and seas to create an ocean.

I want to be truly apart of the family, just like how I want to be apart of the ocean. I want them to accept me. I want them to love me and make me feel like they care. I do love them. But I also fear going back. And even now, as the sun sets and I start to walk back, my knees shake. For I am afraid, that like many times before, they would not notice me. But as I stare out at the ocean and its gorgeous colours, and as I wonder how far the ocean's depths go, I know that it's okay to fear. I will always fear for the feelings of the ones that I love, because I want to make them happy and not sad. And not to fear.


A/N: Got bored and wrote this. It's kinda weird. I don't feel this way, and this story has nothing to do with anyone from naruto. Anyway, i would have done something like sasuke, itachi or kakshi. But come on, it's a girl. Anyone can tell. For those of you that have read my other stuff, i do write stories. Not just poems. it's just that poems are easier to change into male/female, and it's easier (for me) to change the plot line and crap like that. The first and last words are : "I fear", so cool. didn't mean it to be that way. )

wow...i just realized this is the first story i posted on ff...wow, oh well. I'll post another one soon, Which would it be? You choose - Sasuke, Itachi or Kakashi, for my other story that is. ) R&R!