I grasped Josh's hand tighter when we walked into the common room. Eddie was sitting on the side cushion of one of the couch's, freezing as he noticed us walk into the room. It was the first time Eddie had actually seen Josh and I together. My eyes flickered to where Trudy was preparing supper in the kitchen and I smiled widely at Josh.

"Can you help Trudy with dinner for a while? I just need to talk to Eddie alone for a minute." I said quietly. Josh smiled and pecked my lips.

"No problem." I watched him walk over and start helping Trudy prepare the spaghetti and I turned around, sighing at the sight of Eddie. I strolled over to the couch he was sitting on and I sat on the opposite end. He ignored me and kept writing on his homework paper. I groaned aloud and snatched the pen out of his hand.

"Don't ignore me."

"Why not? You've been doing a damn good job of ignoring me since you and what's-his-face started dating." He retorted, taking the pen back from my hand.

"You're so dramatic! His name's Josh, by the way." I snapped. Eddie ignored me and I huffed, knowing we would actually have to have a serious conversation. "Look, I had reasons for breaking up with you."

"No shit, you wanted to date him instead."

"No! Don't make it out so I look like a bad person! When we were dating, you never wanted to spend time with me! You were always out 'protecting' Nina! Plus, we fought constantly! We weren't happy, Eddie! In fact, I was downright miserable!" I said loudly, remembering the times he had blown off our dates because he was having one of his 'Osirion feelings'.

"Don't put all the blame on me, Yacker. You could have tried harder to spend time with me, but you didn't want to. So many times I invited you to go out to dinner or to town with me and you always said you would rather spend the night with Joy or whoever else was there that wasn't me. At least I tried to make it work!" He said and then laughed bitterly. "But now I know that trying to make it work was a mistake, anyway. While I was sitting there, wishing we could spend more time together, you were out flirting with Josh, telling him how much you would rather be hooking up with him than dating me!"

"It's because you hardly even talked to me, let alone treated me like your girlfriend! You make it sound like I didn't like you, but you know that I loved you, Eddie, you just obviously didn't care about me enough to really be with me."

"Just stop, Patricia! Just fucking stop! If you hadn't been so goddamn blinded by that idiot in the other room, then you would be able to see that I did, and still do, care about you! You're just too afraid of me hurting you, so you hurt me before I had the chance!" He practically yelled. I could see the pain in his eyes as he stared at me, breathing a little hard from his outburst. I stared at him, finally understanding that I had hurt him. I could feel the guilt inside me as I shifted my gaze to the floor.

"I'm sorry, alright? I really didn't mean to hurt you. I guess I was just done feeling like I was second to everything else in your life. I thought at some point you were just going to cut me out of your life completely, so I shut you out before you had the chance. I'm sorry." I whispered, honestly. I looked up to see him licking his lips and running his fingers through his hair. "Will you forgive me?"

He looked up at me, eyes unreadable as he said, "You know what, Patricia? No. This time, sorry's just not going to be enough. I'm done."

I watched as he walked away, feeling a pang in my chest. I kept staring at the door he had left through, hoping he would come back. I heard foot steps pad across the wood floor as Josh sat in the seat Eddie had been seated in.

"Everything okay?" He asked, rubbing my knee. I nodded slowly, still staring at the door Eddie has exited from.

"Yeah, everything's fine." I lied.

But everything wasn't fine. I never understood it before, but I had messed up. I listened to my head and my fears, and I ended up here; sitting on a couch with a guy I didn't really like, pining to be with a guy who I had hurt to the point of him hating me.

I had chosen the wrong guy.