England x Germany - Toothpicks and Bananas
A Fanfiction by Leefy and Buggy
One beautiful Swinter morning, Germany awoke early, to the sounds of the Dora-Birds singing, "Jump Jump Everybody, We did it!~"
And Germany was all, "Goddammit Italy what did I tell you about bringing the Dora-Birds into this house? Put them in the cage with the Bootshitzuhs!"
But of course Germany was just talking to himself. He had sent Italy out a while ago to buy him dirty magazines and sausage.
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. It sounded quite urgent.
"Who could it be?" Germany thought, bright eyed and bushy nippled. He had almost forgotten he was part Were-Nazi.
Opening the door, he came to look at, a wet looking England, as white slime dripped down his face. England was all, "I know what you're thinking! But I walked in on France raping a Dora-Bird, and things kinda got out of hand from there."
Germany imagined the scenario in his head, and got a boner as hard as dog food. He tried to cross his legs to hide his raging red strawberry filled erection, but to no avail.
England took one look at the huge bulge in Germany's tight leather pants, and knew he needn't say more. He pressed his smaller English body into Germany's huge German body, and started grinding against him furiously.
And Germany was all, "Ohoho, that tickles, England!" Just then, a wild Dora-Bird appeared. "Do it, do it!" It screamed in its normal horny morning voice.
They both looked at each other slyly. "Pillow fight!" They screamed in unison. Just then they somehow appeared to be on a beach. The sun and the sand were sparkling as the wild Dora-Birds flew across the uneven horizon. They got their pillows ready, and started to chase each other.
England was giggling like a little pansy. "Watch out for the Polly Pockets!" England warned, but it was too late. Germany tripped on the Polly Pockets, and toppled down into the cold, hard sand.
England screamed, "NOOOO!" In that slow motion voice only used in movies as he rushed to Germany's side.
"I don't think I am going to make it." Germany said with tear filled eyes. England looked Germany in the eyes as they both cried together.
"I'LL NEVER LET GO!" England screamed, "I'LL NEVER LET GOOOO!"
And suddenly, everything was quiet…
Italy jolted out of bed. The bad dream was gone. He cuddled closer to Germany as the Dora-Birds sang their song.
THE END.
