Disclaimer: I do NOT own Vampire Academy or A Christmas to Remember

Season's Greetings to all of my readers out there! (Whenever you read this…) WARNING: Sappy ending

Rose POV

I'm not going to sugarcoat it, my life is hell. Let me explain exactly why my life is pure hell, before I start my depressing rant about it. It started off last week, when I got a letter from Lissa in the mail. In my hotel room. When I was supposed to be on a stress-free vacation in the Bahamas. Now you can imagine my surprise when it showed up in a envelope with the word URGENT on it. I ripped it open, because Lissa, sweet Lissa, had put urgent in bright red letters. When I opened the envelope, there was a letter in there with only three words: St. Vlad's STAT. Me, being her friend and guardian, rushed there as fast as I could, I called in a few favors with a private jet owner, and I was there in a couple hours.

Here's where I get royally pissed: Liss was there…with a red Santa hat on her head. I had just flown across the ocean to get to her because I thought she was in danger, and she was just trying to get me here fast. I felt my shoulders slump as anger and exasperation flowed through me. This is not considered an emergency, no one considers a party to be so vital that you give your best friend a heart attack.

So here I am, sitting outside on the snow covered ground, under a snow covered tree, with my former mentor. The former mentor that I happen to still be in love with even though he broke my heart over and over again. I can barely stand to be on the same property as him, let alone right next to him; Lissa is dead set on us hanging out, though, we obviously don't want to. She doesn't understand why we don't want to be around each other when, before; we would do whatever it took to be around each other almost 24/7…

Twinkling lights
A chill is in the air
And carols everywhere
Close your eyes, it's almost here
Candles and cards
And favorite movie scenes
The smell of evergreen
As special as it's always been
And I have a dream or two
And maybe they will come true

The lights surrounding the grounds were glittering like mini, multicolored stars and the icy chill of the winter air made me shiver and pull my coat tighter around myself; my cheeks were turning red with the force of the bitingly cold wind. The tunes that the carolers sang drifted toward us and I closed my eyes while I listened; hoping to forget that Dimitri was right beside me.

I drifted off into my own fantasies of peppermint scented candles and family and friends playing cards on the floor in front of the fireplace. The fresh cut smell of the wintergreen tree filled my nose and I made a wish in that special moment.

Setting our hopes on a big snow tonight
We'll wake up to a world of white
It's gonna be a Christmas to remember
Light up the fire, play some Nat King Cole
Always sentimental and don't you know that
It's gonna be a Christmas to remember

I felt my fantasy of a loving, snowy Christmas die as I opened my eyes to the hateful snow that surrounded me. It was as cold as the heart of God; he made a world of beauty around us in mockery of my pain.

How I wished that this would be the joyous occasion of my dreams; a day to think back fondly on. I dreamt of lighting a fire as we listened to some Nat King Cole. I hated to say it, but I was a sentimental fool; I believed in the magic of Christmas and the romance that would happen if you were with your love.

I felt His gaze on me as I stared at the trees ahead of us, but I didn't want to look; I didn't want to have my fantasy ruined by reality. That wish didn't come true though; he just had to turn me towards him and spoil my dreams.

We stared into each other's eyes as the silence between us grew thick with tension. It wasn't a comfortable silence, but an awkward one that made everyone want to leave or be caught in it.

"Roza," he whispered, painstakingly soft. It sounded as if he loved me, but I knew that that wasn't the case. He had proven to me over and over again that he didn't love me, but I was always too stupid to believe the truth even when it stood right before me.

I wouldn't let it become really, but I would let myself dream a little. I could turn this moment into one of my fantasies and pretend that it was real. I could make time stand still for a moment and enjoy my lie…

I know it's true
Time doesn't stand still
Many things can change
But we know some things never will
The memories we share
The songs we always sing
The mystery of life
The hopefulness this season brings
And I have a dream or two
And maybe they will come true

I knew that time wouldn't stand still for me; it wouldn't grant that to anyone. Even as I looked in his eyes, I could see that everything had changed; we could never return to what we had been, like. In many ways it resembled life, you could live it one way and it might stay the same, or you could go down another path and you won't be able to go back to the good old days where everything was perfect and wonderful.

The history between us was a blessing and a curse to remember; the good times gave me brief happiness that quickly faded in the presence of the pain that came with it. It had been so great, but it had had to come to an end; causing me to despise the time we had shared. If we had never been an 'us', I wouldn't feel so much pain at our separation.

I remembered his favorite things; his favorite genre of books is western, his favorite food is anything Russian, he is the only guy in his family, he hates his father, and he always wanted kids.

Despite all that's happened, I still find myself wishing for a change of heart on his part. I wished that he would open his eyes and see that he loved me and not any of the other women that were always out for his heart.
Setting our hopes on a big snow tonight
We'll wake up to a world of white
It's gonna be a Christmas to remember
Light up the fire, play some Nat King Cole
Always sentimental and don't you know that
It's gonna be a Christmas to remember

I was still looking in his eyes with a wish that I knew would never again come true, but I still sat there with his hand under my chin. I sat there and thought about all of the good times we shared. I thought about those moments that he let loose and showed his love for me; the secret kisses in the shadows, the hugs, the loving words that he whispered in my ear, and even the cabin in the woods…

He just stared at me as the battle raged inside me.

"Roza," he repeated just as softly as before.

"What," I asked. It hurt to hear my nickname come from his lips. It made me remember all the times that he had said it; it made me remember the happy, loving whispers in my ear and the cold goodbyes. I had no idea about what he was going to say, I had been over seven years since I had last talked to him.

"I'm so sorry, Roza," he began. "I never wanted to hurt you and I'm so sorry that I did. I will do anything to make it up to you."

I looked at him. "What if I told you to leave and to never let me see your face again," I asked him.

"I'd say that I would, but that I would never forget you or the love that I hold for you in my heart."

"What love? You never really loved me, I was just a past time for you while you waited for Tasha to come for you," I replied bitterly. I hated how jealous I sounded, even to my own ears. I wasn't supposed to love him after he left me so many times; it was the universe playing a cruel trick on me. To make me believe that I still loved him when I should hate him with every fiber of my being was so more than a cruel trick for the enjoyment of others.

"I always loved you, Roza. I only left to protect you."

"Protect me from what," I snapped.

"I only wanted to protect you from the comments and the rumors that would come with our being together."

"I loved you, Dimitri. I didn't care if people talked; I was caught up in the belief that you loved me enough to stay with me and help me not care about what they said. I thought that you'd be there for me when I needed you, but apparently I was dreaming when I thought that." I thought for a moment. "You were right to leave me," I started again. He looked like he relaxed a little after hearing that. "It was smart for you to leave me, it makes me hurt to think about the man I loved being stuck with me when he clearly never loved me enough to stand up for us." That brought his face back to a saddened frown; he didn't like the truth so much now that it was being told to his face by his "love".

"I always have and always will love you, Roza. No matter what you believe about it, I do. I only wanted to prevent you from being hurt, but I apparently only hurt you worse than they could have. I wish you still loved me, but I know it's to much to ask. Again, I'm sorry for all the pain." He said as he turned to walk away. I knew I would regret this later, but I had to do it.

"Wait," I called to him. He turned back around. I hesitated before I answered. "I still love you. I wouldn't have bitched you out I didn't love you." I looked him dead in the eye. "I'm just trying not to get hurt again," I murmured. I saw a smile start to spread on his face; not one of the usual half smiles I got, but a full blown smile, teeth and all.

He walked back to me as fast as he could, which is pretty dang fast. The moment he was with in arms reach of me, he picked me up in his arms and swung me around in a circle. I felt like a teenager again as we danced in the falling snow with only the sound of his footsteps being our music. We never released each other's eyes as we danced the night away under the spotlight of the moon and the twinkling lights of the stars and Christmas lights.

I don't think that either of us made a conscious decision to do it, but our faces grew closer and our lips connected. It was magic. The long overdue feeling of his lips against mine sent a shiver of pleasure down my spine and I leaned in closer, trying to be as close to him as I could get. Both our eyes stayed open, albeit half closed, but open; we had been to long without each other to close our eyes. Our noses brushed and I tangled my hands into his hair. I had missed the feeling of running my fingers through his hair and I moaned a low, throaty sound that came from deep within my chest. He moaned at the sound of mine, and our circle came to a halt as be both dropped to the ground; me on his lap and him holding me close with one arm twined around my back and the other woven through my hair.

As our lips separated, we didn't move apart; we sat there in the snow with our foreheads touching, staring into each other's eyes.

"Finally!" a chorus of voices called out.

We both turned our heads to the group of our friends staring at us from the bushes. I looked at Dimitri.

"You asked them to help you out, didn't you?" he nodded.

"When dealing with you, Roza, I need all the help I can get," he whispered affectionately in my ear.

"You are so lucky that she stuck around, Belikov; you were hesitating for so long I was starting to wonder if you weren't going to do it!" laughed Christian.

"I had a feeling that this was a little too planned," I said to Dimitri.

"What gave you that impression?"

"The fading lights were a little too coincidental for the moment to be unplanned."

"I-"

"Relax, I stick to what I said: I still love you." I told him. I turned my face back to the guys. "Now you guys shoo before I attack him."

"You are not going to kill him after all the hard work we did to get you guys back together!" Lissa cried.

"No, but I refuse to let you guys see his wicked abs," I said with a Cheshire grin on my face.

"Why would…," they started. "That is just wrong, Rose! We don't need to know about that!" they all screeched.

I let them screech for a bit, but then I just planted my lips back on Dimitri's and clamped my hands to his shirt; they disappeared pretty fast after that.

Before we did anything else, I pulled my lips slightly away from his. He looked confused.

"Merry Christmas, Dimitri," I whispered against his lips and I felt his lips curve into a smile against mine.

"Merry Christmas, Roza," he said as he planted another kiss on my lips.