Chapter One: Kumiko the Mute

I felt so very lonely. As if I had this huge crater in me that no one around me could fill. Not friend, nor family; just him. I had times when i felt like to was about to drown and there was no one strong enough to pull me out of the dangerous waters. I would feel suffocated and found it impossible to be truly happy. I couldn't tell him this, though. I hated the way things were. Why did circumstances have to be set up so? I wished I could turn back time and stop myself from ever meeting him. I had often wished that I could be crying becuase he didn't know how I felt but he did. And he cared for me too which made it that much harder to say goodbye to him. I had sometimes wished that our memories of each other could be erased. I wished that nothing had happened between us; nothing has been said. This had brought me so much pain. Nothing good came in the longrun from my foolish urge to tell him how I felt. I was picky, I had high standards for the guys I chose. Why did I have to choose him?!? Why did I choose someone I couldn't have. I'd wonder what might happen if i killed myself. Would it end all my pain? But I didn't have the courage to commit suicide.. Besides, what if he came back? I still loved him, I truly did but this pain was nearly unbearable. I wanted no more tears. I would cry nearly every night for him. I wanted just to get over him! I wanted not to care for him anymore. I wished he had never come in into my life....

They say when you're in love

You feel like you can fly

When I'm near you, dear

It's only us; just you and I

But when you're not beside me,

I feel so many things.

Discouragment, frustration, and fear

I feel like someone's clipped my wings

If I could have one touch from you

One loving embrace is all

I know that I could make it

I know I wouldn't fall.

You're so very out of reach

I almost can't bear this space

I cannot find you. Where are you?

I need to see your face

If I could see you know

I'd leave my life behind

I'd give you it all

To feel your hand touch mine

I never knew what alone was

Now I feel so very weak

I'm so tired, confused, and scared

But I'm strengthened when I hear you speak

I wish I could feel joyful

I haven't felt it in a while

The thing that makes me happy

Is simply to see you smile

I've been shot from the sky

My wings are broken and tattered

But one loving look would cure me

One look that made me think I mattered

Without you here right now

In my walk of life, I've slipped

I cannot fly 'till you come back

For now my wings are clipped.

"Kumiko! Breakfast is ready so you better get down here before Miyuki eats it all," my mother called from the kitchen. I rolled over in my bed and groaned lazily. I didn't want to get up today, but one the less, I clumsily got out of my bed and made my way into the kitchen to eat.

Hi, I'm Kumiko Tohiji. I'm seventeen years old with naturally blonde hair (which I dyed black) and very pale skin. I am pretty short with violet eyes and a very "petite body" as my mom would say. I'm usually by myself at school or at home and I like to keep silent most of the time. They called me anit-social but they never bothered to find out why.

When I sat down at the table, my younger thirteen-year-old sister chirped her usual good morning and my mom gave me a kiss on the head before handing me a plate of pancakes.

"You're eyes look swollen, sweetie, were you crying last night?" my mom asked with concern evident in her voice.

"I just tripped and twisted my ankle last night but I'm fine now," I answered trying to assure my mom that I was alright. I was always having to come up with excuses like that to explain why I had been crying.

"Sure is wasn't over a boy, Kumiko?" my sister asked in her teasing tone. "Did another one turn you down?"

"Why does your whole world revolve around boys? And to answer your question, it wasn't. I have better things to do all day besides think about some boy."

Not that I did them....

"Geez, getting a little defensive, aren't we?"

"Shut up, Miyuki! You don't know what you're talking about!!"

"Girls, try not to fight," Mom said.

"The vermin started it," I said. I felt like arguing this morning.

"Hey!"

"Well you did!"

"Stop it! Both of you! One more argumenative word from either of you and you're both going to be in trouble," Mom said sternly and we both shut up and ate our breakfast.

At school that day, everything went perfectly normally. Boring classes, people throwing stuff at me, the teachers droning on an on about useless information like the atmoic weight of Boron. (A/N: I mean, WHO really cares?!) Lunch was my favorite time of the day, not because it let me interact with other kids but because it let me get away from them for a bit. I always ate my lunch in a tree about ten feet away from the pic-nic tables that the rest of the kids ate at. They called me the "Tree Bat" because I liked to get up there whenever I could at school. But anyway, I climbed nimbly up the tree till I found a sturdy branch to sit on and eat. For some reason, a familiar memory popped into my head at this moment...

-------Flashback----------

"Hiei," I said quietly. "I know you're here and I know you can hear me. Come down from where ever you are." There was a soft thud and Hiei stood beside me.

"What do you want?" he asked in his icey cold tone but I had learned to ignore the coldness.

"I need to tell you something before you go tomorrow," I answered nervously and I didn't turn to face him. I couldn't face him.

There was a long pause and Hiei said impatiently, "Well?"

"Please promise me first that you won't talk after I say what I'm about to tell you."

"Why?" he asked suspiciously.

"Because I'm pretty sure I know how you'd answer."

"Fine then."

"Hiei, I.... it's just that...... well, you see," I stammered and gathered enough courage to look at him. "Hiei, I think I love you."

The wind blew.

The cold night air chilled my bare arms.

He just stared at me.

"I know I shouldn't and I understand that by telling you this that it doesn't change anything and I'm risking you pushing me away but I had to tell you," I said quickly and all in one breath then looked away in embarassment. I felt a hand settle on my shoulder and a deep voice tickle my ear.

"Stop talking," he said and I froze. I was on the brink of tears because I thought he was rejecting me but I managed to keep them back. The hand moved from my shoulder to my chin as he forced me to look at him. He still wore his same emotionless face but his eyes were different. Those blood-red eyes held shock and confusion and indecision.

"I'm sorry, Hiei, but it would have eaten me from the inside out had I not told you. Please don't be angry at me because I just couldn't stand that."

"Didn't I just tell you not to talk?" he said not really posing it as a question but more of a repeated command. He pulled me towards him since he still had a hold on my chin and kissed me. It was barely more than a peck on the lips but it was enough to stun me. When he pulled away, my eyes were gigantic. He leaped into the trees and disappeared from sight.

-------End Flashback--------

"There's no guys like Hiei," I thought as I munched on the last of my food. "He was so mysterious and intriguing. I could almost never tell what he was thinking. Regular guys are so easy to read.You just have to learn how to decode them. Hiei always kept me guessing and even though I didn't always like not knowing, it made me curious about him"

"Hey! Get down from your tree. The bell just rang. Don't you need to get to class?" yelled someone at the foot of the tree. I looked down and said nothing to the boy staring up at me with an annoyed look on his face. "Come down already! I don't want to get more homework just because you don't care."

I hated people like him. All of them thinking they know me. I was the scary, little, psycho girl in the corner who never spoke unless spoken to. I did care about school but these teachers were strict. If anyone was late to class then everyone in that class would get extra homework. Not a great method but the school board didn't quite agree with my thoughts.

I jumped straight down from my branch, not really bothering to climb down the proper way.

"Took you long enough," the boy said and I gave him a blank stare before walking off to my next class. He followed beside me. "Why do you do that? Not talk to anyone. Do you think you're better than everybody else or something?"

"Don't think for a second that you comprehend why I do what I do or why I am how I am," I said with an icey edge in my voice.

"So you can talk!" he said with a sarcastic happiness.

"This is why I don't talk," I said more as a reminder to myself than a statement to him.

"Why?" he asked stupidly.

"Because all I get are cracks about how 'anti-social' I am or something like that," I answered and made guestures with my hand when I said "anti-social".

"Well, no offense but you sort of set yourself up for them by never speaking to anyone."

"And you set yourself up for looking judgemental when you don't even ask why I keep to myself."

"Well if you said something every once in a while and told someone why then people might be a little more sensative," he said grabbing my arm and stopped my walking.

"I don't like to talk about it," I said glaring at him then starting to walk away again.

'Then don't call us judgemental just because you won't explain why you hate to talk. You don't give us a chance to know why you act this way." I stopped walking and faced him, giving him a questioning stare.

"Do you even care?"

"As a matter of fact, I do."

"Is this for blackmail or something? A bet that you could find me out?"

"No, but I'd like to understand you," he said and I forced back a smile. Why was I smiling??

"If you're doing this because you pity me then I don't need your sympathy."

"No! I'm serious. You're interesting to me since you don't talk. What kind of thing could have happened to you that made you want to have nothing to do with other people?"

"It's a long and very invloved story," I said letting a tiny smile creep onto my face.

"Then could we talk about it? I'd like to meet you after school," he said and a second later, a girl with brown hair, who was undoubtedly his girlfriend, yelled at him about getting to class.

"I'm not sure I can," I said trying to get out of it all.

"Please?" he said giving me a very pleading look. I sighed and gave in.

"Alright then. Where do you want to meet?"

"Do you know where that apartment building is on Sanuri Street is?"

"Yeah."

"Go up to the desk and tell them you're a friend of Yusuke's. They'll know where to take you."

"Ok, I'll se you then!" I said and ran all the way to class.

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A/N: WHEEEE!!! The first chapter is up! Yay!! And this whole thing is based on a poem I wrote called "Clipped Wings" and if you actually read this thing then you'll notice that I included it in here. It's my favorite of all my poems so far and sounded like a good fanfic idea. So it's all my idea.... mine..... my own..... except the yyh characters and all that crap but THAT'S NOT THE POINT!!! Hehehe! I hope you guys read chapter 2 and I'll be doing review answers and stuff so if you have questions or anything then PLEASE REVIEW!!! And even if you didn't like it.... REVIEW!!!!