Losing Him I

Harrys pov

Harry looked around the room, he looked at his fiancé Ginny and at Mrs Weasley; finally he looked at his best friend Hermione. His heart was heavy, how could he tell them, tell her, that Ron was missing. He was the one that sent him, he was the one that convinced Ron to go to the mountains to chase Malfoy and his small group of death eaters. Hermione had begged and pleaded with Harry not to, she said she'd had a dream of the mission and that Ron would not return.

He had ignored her desperation. Ron was eager to go, he had sworn to catch Malfoy at all costs, not for his crimes against the wizard world, but for the pain he had inflicted on his beloved Hermione; for the things he had done to her and the things he had threatened to do. It was his love for her that willed him to go. It was Harry's hatred of Malfoy that allowed him to send Ron over any of his trained aurors, and now he was faced with telling Hermione that Ron was missing, and after only a year of marriage she may be a widow.

He had flooed Ginny at their home and told her to make sure everyone was at the Burrow when he arrived from the Ministry. Ginny knew then. He looked around the room and swallowed. He couldn't find the words.

"its Ron isn't it?" Ginny said, he nodded back in confirmation.

"he's missing?" Hermione asked, he nodded again, there were no words in his throat, "is he dead?" he heard her say as she stood and walked towards him.

"I don't know, it's possible, probable." was all he could answer. She slapped him hard across the cheek, the sound of it rung out through the room.

"I hate you Harry Potter," she screamed, "I hate you." Mrs Weasley took her arms and led her away both of them trembling, tears streaking their faces.

Ginny ran to Harry and hugged him, her own tears dropping against his shirt.

"she didn't mean it Harry."

"yes she did and she has every right to. She begged me not to send him, she said he wouldn't come back. I didn't listen, I let my own hatred of Malfoy blind me. She should hate me."

"Harry, I'm not sure if I should tell you this, but, she had some news today," she drew in an uncertain breath, "she's pregnant Harry."

He felt the news crash against him, the weight of his decision, the consequences, his selfishness. All of it hit him, and he thought his knees may buckle under the pressure. Too many children had grown up alone, no mothers, no fathers, all thanks to Voldermort. Harry knew better than any of them how this felt, Voldermort was defeated and now it was Harry that would cause another child to grow up without a father. This was not how it should be, they should be celebrating now, not mourning. He turned from Ginny's arms and left the Burrow, she shouted after him.

"where are you going?"

His reply was short, "to find him." and he apparated away.