It is a normal day in Ireland. The leprechauns are hiding in their little rainbow. Artemis Fowl is plotting in a fowl manor. Wait, isn't that supposed to be IN Fowl Manor? WHO WROTE THIS JUNK! Anyways on with the fanfic!
Artemis: Well, Butler, this may be our biggest heist yet! We must steal the paperclip that appears at the bottom of the screen on the computer! (he and butler look down to see a paperclip with eyeballs)
Butler: Is that… natural?
Holly: Of course it is
Artemis: Where did you come from?
Holly: Well lets see my grandfather was Cupid and then he had kids and-
Artemis: Enough said, Holly.
Butler: Artemis, we still have to steal the paperclip.
Bane144: Good luck with that.
Holly and Butler: Who are you?
Butler: Get out of this house before I'm forced to hurt you.
Bane144: I'm here to help you steal the paperclip.
Underlord: ALONG WITH ME. BWUAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA
Bane144: UNDERLORD good to see you! How's the whole ebil thing working out?
Artemis: Excuse me, but may I ask who you both are?
Bane144: I'm Bane144.
Underlord: I am Underlord! HEAR ME ROAR!!!
They all wait for the roar…
Root: I didn't hear no roar.
Underlord: Er… it's a catch phrase…
Ron: Are you related to bane the centaur?
Bane144: Aren't you supposed to be dead? We pushed you off of Hogwarts castle…
Underlord: I DID IT! IM EBIL! (dances)
(Root shoots Ron with a Neutrino 2000)
Underlord: (gasp) HOW DARE YOU TRY TO TAKE MY SPOT AS AN EBIL MAN!...fairy…
Underlord starts to strangle root and Bane144, Holly, Butler and Artemis (doing the least effort possible) try pull him off.
Foaly: What's this I hear about you needing to steal a paperclip?
Artemis: The paperclip on the computer, Foaly…and where did you come from? (points to screen)
Foaly: Well you see, I made this molecular displacer that transfers the atoms in your body into the time warp and….
He goes on to explain how the machine works until underlord gets extremely pissed off at him.
Underlord: DAMMIT YOU STUPID HORSE, SHUT UP!!!! YOU'RE MAKING MY EBIL MIND HURT!!!
While underlord is screaming he hits Root again and Root goes flying through a random spike in the wall.
Artemis: We really should've fixed that spike…
Butler: Maybe if we weren't so busy stealing paperclips and fairy gold…
Holly: ROOOOOOOOT NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Root: Holly… before I go… I wanted to tell you… I love you…
(Awkward silence)
Holly: Er….I like Artemis, though. (runs over to Artemis and kisses him)
Artemis: Er…. I like Root though….
Root: WTF!! (dies)
Butler: Why doesn't anyone love me? Maybe I'll go parachuting…
Lucky: ME LUCKY CHARMS!!!
Butler: Uh oh…Artemis, it's him…
Bane144, Underlord, Holly, Foaly (at the same time): who?
Artemis: This is Lucky, we stole is lucky charms
Everyone looks at Lucky.
Underlord: He looks like a leprechaun…where's your pot of gold?
Lucky: (pulls out a bowl of lucky charms) HERE IT IS!!!!
Bane144: OMG!!! LUCKY CHARMS!!! (drools) GET HIM!
Foaly and Bane144 have a very dull and boring cartoon chase around fowl manor in which for some reason ends with Lucky walking on the wall.
Lucky: ARTEMIS STOLE ME LUCKY CHARMS!
Underlord: (bonks Lucky on the head) Silly rabbit, tricks are for kids!
Butler: I think you have the wrong cereal character…
Underlord: SHUDDAP!
Random person: I AM RAND-
The random person drops dead with a big hole in his head and Butler standing over him with a smoking pistol.
Underlord: Wow… I'm not even that bad….
Everyone looks at Butler.
Butler: What? I was getting tired of people breaking in!
Artemis: Alright, I have a plan to steal the paperclip, gather in (everyone gathers REALLY REALLY close to Artemis) uh… not that much.
Underlord: BAH, DAMN THIS!!!
Underlord jumps into the computer and everyone looks at the computer screen to see an animated Underlord
Underlord: THIS IS SO AWESOME!!! (runs over to the paperclip guy) I GOT HIM, I GOT HIM!!!!!
Millions of other windows icons surround Underlord looking very angry.
Underlord: mother f-
They start ruthlessly pounding away at Underlord until Artemis drags him and the paperclip into a folder and brings them back out into the real world.
Underlord: I am NEVER going back there….
Artemis: Ok, well….now what?
Butler: Aren't you supposed to know? You're the genius!
Artemis: I didn't think we could pull it off….
Butler: Aw, screw this (shoots Artemis) You're a headache to listen to anyways.
The end GET USED TO IT
Ya, so I killed Artemis, I have to admit he was a headache to listen to as well! AHAHAHA HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT
A/N: Er...ya, this is why you don't let Underlord get bored...ever! And the puhing Ron off Hogwarts tower is from our other story, Of Crazy Cat Ladies and Chocolate. Read that one too, and please review! Wow, that rhymed...Oo, shiny!
(gets distracted by something shiny)
Underlord: All flames will be used to toast smores...SMORES ROCK!!!
Bane144: Don't ask...
