OUAT (sadly) does not belong to me. All rights go to the creators.
This was inspired by a gif by tumblr user Zephyroh.
This is my first fic so please be nice.
Regina got out of her car and briskly walked into her mansion. She found her way to the liquor cabinet and opened it. What she found annoyed her. The most expensive bottle of scotch was gone.
'Swan or Cassidy probably took it.' She thought to herself, fuming. Regina took the next best thing, poured herself a glass and settled into a chair, waiting for her 'co-parents", as Neal insisted to call each other, to arrive with a half empty bottle.
Regina waited and waited. She waited until 9 p.m. That's when she began to worry. Emma hadn't called to check up on Henry yet, who was fast asleep in his room. She usually called every night at around 8 to 9 whenever Henry had his month-long sleepovers. Now that she thought about it, she hadn't heard from Emma or Neal all day. By 9:30 Regina had wrapped herself up in her coat and scarf to look for the two morons, her first stop, Granny's.
Regina walked up to Ruby and asked, "Have you seen Emma or Neal?"
"Sorry, you're Majesty, but we're closed." Ruby replied, dismissively.
"I know that Ruby, I'm just asking if you saw them or if they passed by." Regina replied.
Ruby hesitated, "They were here earlier, talking about movies or something."
"Do you know where they went?" Ruby eyed her, suspicious. "Oh, relax; I won't rip out their hearts or anything.
Ruby tilted her head upward and sniffed the air, "They went that way." She said, pointing in the direction of the Charmings' house.
Later, while walking down Queen Street to the Charmings, Regina got a call. She glanced at the caller I'D and answered it,
"What is it Belle?" she snapped.
"Can you please get Emma and Baelfire out of the library? They've been here for hours, and, I can hear them singing through the floor boards."
"What…Why are they… you know what, never mind, I'm on my way." Regina sighed, wondering why they would go to the library, when, they don't even read.
"Oh and…you might need to bring fresh clothes for Baelfire."
"It's NEAL!" Regina heard Neal's slurred voice in the background. "N-E-A-L!" Then, she hung-up the phone and walked back to her car.
Regina didn't know what to expect when she walked into that library, she assumed that Emma and Neal were drunk, singing a bunch of songs she didn't know. The first thing she noticed was her bottle of scotch, empty, on the floor next to an old television set showing some cartoon mermaid singing and dancing. The second thing she noticed was Emma, who somehow got herself at the top of a book-shelf, singing, off key, at the top of her lungs.
"SOME DAY, MY PRINCE WILL COME!"
"Swan, get down from there!"
"SOME DAY WE'LL MEET AGAIN!" Emma continued.
Regina heard laughing behind her. She turned around to see a red- faced Neal, The front if his shirt covered in vomit.
"AND AWAY TO HIS CASTLED WE'LL GO!" Neal sung.
"TO BE HAPPY FOREVER I KNO-" Emma fell off the bookshelf and landed face- first on the ground.
"EMMA!" Neal yelled and ran toward her, only to trip on his feet and fall on a pile of books. Regina rolled her eyes and walked toward the groaning duo.
"Get up, both of you." She said, taking both of their arms and draping them across her shoulders. "We're going to my house." Regina looked up and saw Belle looking down at her with tired eyes.
"I'll make sure this doesn't happen again, Miss French." Belle started to say something, but, instead, let out a huge yawn and left for her room.
The ride home wasn't pleasant. With the constant singing and the smell of Neal's vomit, it was her second worst car ride.
"Tale as old as time," Emma sang quietly "True as it can be/ barely even friends/ when somebody bends/ unexpectedly."
Neal started snickering uncontrollably.
We…should…have sung…that…to Belle." Neal commented, his words being interrupted by his own hiccups and giggle fits.
"Oh! Regina, I have a song for you!" Emma exclaimed, "POOR UNFORTUNATE SOU-." Regina turned the radio volume, drowning out Emma's singing. Although she didn't like the song that was playing, which was some little kid singing about babies or something, she decided it was better than listening to Emma sing while flailing her arms around.
Soon, they returned to her mansion and dragged both into her living room. She made them lie down on the couches while she found some blankets and pillows. She threw them to the pair, and turned off the lights.
"Now go to sleep." Regina ordered.
"Okay, night, night" Emma murmured.
"Don't let the bed bugs bite! Neal finished laughing loudly at his 'clever' rhyme.
"Shut it Cassidy, you'll wake up Henry." With that, Regina went upstairs to her room, and collapsed onto her bed.
The next morning, was a Saturday, so Regina got up to make Henry's favourite, egg omelet with cinnamon topped hot chocolate. When she reached the kitchen Emma was already awake and quietly stirring a cup o coffee.
"Good morning!" Regina chirped loudly and much more cheerily than she usually preferred, which made Emma cringe and Neal to wake up moaning.
"Morning, mom." She heard Henry reply, as he walked sleepily down the stairs. "And…mom… and dad? What are you two doing here?"
"Oh, you know, to say hello." Emma answered.
"Mom I heard you making breakfast from upstairs; you're not usually this loud." Henry said directing his attention to Regina while he sat next to Emma.
"Yes, well, I have my reasons."
Regina reached for the eggs and cracked them extra loudly over the bowl making Neal and Emma groan quietly. Then she reached for the electric mixer and turned it on putting it on high, not caring how the omelet may turn out.
"Aaaaaargh, Make it stop! My head is killing me!" Neal moaned into his pillows.
Henry looked back and forth between his parents, confused and asked loudly,
"What's going on guys?" making Emma groan and rest her forehead on the cool counter.
"That'll teach them not to empty my, 5,000 dollar, 40 year Glengoyne." Regina muttered to herself, before turning to Henry. "Nothing Henry, we just have a little…argument."
"Yeah kid, nothing evil or magic related, nothing to worry about." Emma assured him.
"Now eat up, I made you your favourite." Regina said handing him a plate of an egg omelet with mint and apples on the side.
"Thanks, by the way I have a science project to do with Grace, do you mind dropping me off at her house?"
"Sure thing."
After dropping off Henry at Jefferson's place, Regina returned home to find Neal fully awake drinking coffee with Emma. Both of them were a bit more sober.
"Singing 'My Prince Will Come' at the top of the library while completely drunk? Really Swan?" Regina asked when she stormed into the house.
Emma hesitated, "For my defense…it was Neal's idea."
"It was hilarious! It was a shame you missed that, Regina." Neal commented, placing his coffee mug in the sink.
"You two are going to apologize to Belle and pay for the damage."
"Damage? What Damage?"
"The bookshelf, tears in multiple books, the TV set from Gold's shop, my bottle of scotch, need I go on?" Regina asked.
"Fine we'll pay for the damage and your booze, how much could that cause anyways?"
"It's $1,500 for the damage and $5,000 for my bottle of scotch." Regina stated.
"WHAT? Where are we supposed to get $6,000?" Asked Emma.
"Not my problem." Regina said as she walked away, planning for a way to get back at the two.
So what do you think? please revied and/or leave suggestions.
Thanks for reading!
~Gerynss
