Nightmares. She had them almost every night. Some were gut-wrenching, others were heartbreaking. But all of them woke Brightheart up yowling in fear and sadness. Had her scrambling out of her nest and den, and towards the dirtplace as soon as possible to heave out the mole or bird she last ate.
Brightheart tried her best to be quiet, to not wake the other cat who had worked hard all day hunting, training paws, and protecting the Clan from any unwanted 'visitors'. She tried not to shriek or thrash around in her bedding. To not bother anyone, but she often heard the grumbles of the other cats whenever she would gasp too loudly or bump into them.
They usually just hissed or flattened their ears whenever Brightheart had nightmares.
Nightmares.
She hated them. They tore at her heart and ripped at her sanity. She wished she didn't have them. Wished with all her heart. Wished that she never had to see the huge, ravaging beasts that echoed in her dreams. Or the loud growls and blood curdling screams that haunted her soul.
Pack, pack! Kill, kill!
Over and over, they played in her mind, she couldn't escape them.
They trailed her in her sleep and followed her in her wake.
Pack, pack! Kill, kill!
And they would stalk her until the end of her days.
Pack, pack! Kill, kill!
There was no hope for Brightheart
Pack!
They would find her.
Pack!
They'd hunt her down.
Kill!
And end her.
Kill!
Just like they did to Swiftpaw.
Pack, pack! Kill, kill!
Brightheart jolted awake eyes wide with terror. It had been happening again. The dogs, the teeth, the blood, Swiftpaw's screams of fear and pain. Brightheart's breathing became gasps as she tried to calm her racing heart. She could still see his eyes. Full of horror. Absolute horror.
Brightheart's heart sped up. The walls started closing in on her. The air became dense and hard to breathe. Darkness swirled in her vision, threatening to overcome her once more.
No!
She shook her head. She needed to get out of here.
"Brightheart?" a voice whispered, Cloudtail. "Are you alright?"
No, she would never be alright. Not after what she'd seen. What she'd felt. Brightheart muttered an apology and raced out of the den.
Fresh, slightly cold air filled her legs as she lumbered out. Her feet sprang across frosted grass and she vaguely wondered when leafbare would come. Brightheart raced through the clearing and out of the tunnel, thorns snagging on her as she blindly ran. She leaped over boulders and sprinted along ferns. She dove around trees and tripped on holes and branches. She ran and ran, not caring where she was going as her feet went on autopilot.
She thought she could hear pawsteps behind her and someone faintly calling her name, but Brightheart was too panicked to care.
She finally stopped to catch her breath. As she looked around she realized she was by Sunning Rocks. She walked over to the smooth stones, glinting in the moonlight. From there she sat and watched the water cascading over the rocks. After a few heartbeats, she heard the sound of heavy pawsteps running up to her, she turned around and saw Cloudtail racing towards her. He reached her and fell down, panting heavily.
"Y-you run rea-really f-fast!" he exclaimed and she smiled a little.
"That's because I don't spend all day lying in the sun," she playfully retorted.
Cloudtail gave her a mocked gasp. "I'm not merely just lying in the sun, I'm storing up the energy to chase you down."
Brightheart blinked her eyes in affection and cuddled closer to him. He nuzzled her and the two stayed like that for a while, just enjoying the other presence. Cloudtail was the one to break the silence.
"Are you still having nightmares?" he asked.
Brightheart sighed and nodded. Cloudtail licked her between the ears.
"You now you can always come to me, right?" When she didn't say anything, Cloudtail continued. "Really. I want to help you. Please." He gazed into her eyes. Brightheart nodded.
"I know, I just- I- I don't want to be a burden. Piling all my troubles on you."
"Brightheart, listen to me." Cloudtail ordered and Brightheart was surprised at his stern tone.
"You are NOT a burden. You understand? You are the bravest, honest, loving, passionate, fiercest, and beautiful warrior I have ever met, and ever will meet. You don't need to hide your fears or anything else from me. I love you, Brightheart. I love you. Not Lostface, you. And I can and will protect you. Brightheart," Cloudtail paused and pressed his nose to hers. "Brightheart. I love you and I want what's best for you. I don't care if you have demons that haunt you."
Brighthearts eyes started to well up.
"It doesn't matter to me if they whisper in your ears that you're not good enough, not brave enough, and not strong enough. I don't care what they say, and you shouldn't either. Because the cats that love you know you're beyond good. We know you've surpassed bravery. And know that you've accelerated at strength. Yes, we – I know you have a dark past. I know. And I love you anyways. I always have and always will. So please, talk to me." Cloudtail ended his speech and Brightheart nodded, sobbing too much to speak.
When she was ready, she started to speak. She told him everything, and he listened to it all. And when she was done, he told her he was sorry and that she had to go through this alone.
There would be many more travesties, they knew. They knew that their future would have its ups and downs. They understood there would be bumps in the path and hardships to face. But they both knew that now they had each other. Sure they'd cry, hiss, and scream. But they'd do it all together.
