Jigen felt an unusual chill. Shivering, he thrashed his head around, eventually realizing he could not move his arms and legs. They felt to be bound to something. Racking his mind for any hint on what the hell might have happened, he came up blank. He had spent his day as usual: reading the paper, lounging around, taking cat naps, discussing some plans though he hadn't been paying a whole lot of attention since there was some article about professional hair tips. He couldn't remember anything strange at all. He was eventually able to force his eyes to open, eyes clearing of their sleep as they looked down.
He was naked. And he had a good idea why whatever had happened had happened, too. It was his mistake. He had gotten so caught up in his jealousy, girls constantly passing by his couch with high-pitched giggles, coming in and out of Lupin's place, and him theirs. Jigen wanted girls too, and he wasn't desperate enough to go ask Fujiko, the slut. But the important thing was that he didn't want to work for those girls. Sure, it would be so easy just to strut around in his expensive suits, giving girls a peek of that glance from under the fedora. He could make idle conversation with them until they got drunk enough to put out. But they just weren't worth it. So he did the scientific thing. Looking down at his smooth, hairless figure, he regretted it. Unless, of course, his captor was a hot chick with a whip. But he didn't expect to be that lucky.
The change had been instantly noticeable. Without the hair to alter the smell of his sweat, all people got from him was pure sex. In enclosed spaces, even Lupin had gotten hard a few times. They didn't talk about that. More than a few people had come onto him and most of them had been men, much to his chagrin. He could vomit imagining their bulky, glistening bodies ramming hard into his. Or even the other way around, which was almost more disturbing because he would have to look at them. Weapons were good to fix those problems. Only now, he didn't have any weapon at all. At least he was tied to the wall so he wouldn't have to do that awkward looking up while the other person hovers above him thing.
The other thing that was different were his nipples. He wasn't a chick so he didn't have a wear a bra, but he imagined metal clamps were a little different. He stared at them for a good while, nearly squirming. They were so uncool. Plus they were painful. He didn't like them at all, even if the erection he was trying to get rid of told him differently. Good thing he had plenty of things in mind that were totally not sexy at all.
"Hello, Jigen."
And there they were. 'Please be a girl.'
Out came a smirking woman (thankfully) with a leather thong, a matching halter top (what there was of it) and her hair in a high ponytail. She had an eye-mask on, ensuring she would never be caught if Jigen escaped. Most of all, she had a whip! Jigen didn't get a hard-on though, 'cause he was waiting to see how evil she was first. A chick just trying to get his money was a major turn-off.
"Comfy?" she asked in a mocking tone, coming closer to him.
Jigen gritted his teeth. "What do you want with me?"
"Isn't it obvious?" she asked, running the whip through her mouth which made her mouth all red and swollen.
Jigen wasn't sure what to say. He was too busy staring at her chest which was pretty flat. Still, the leather was a nice touch.
Not noticing this at all, the girl started to fold her pointer finger until the nail touched her thumb and flicked Jigen's manthingy, Jigen having to bite down on his lip not to cry out in complete and total ecstacy. It was so arrousing (hot) that even afterward, he was trying to regain his composure enough to talk, afraid all that would come out was a moan.
"Enjoying your clamps?" the girl asked bashfully, not regarding what she had just done.
"N-no," Jigen said a little too quickly. He would have crossed his arms had he been able to.
"I think you are." She seemed amused by this.
Jigen only blushed as the woman got closer to him once again. This time, he could not contain a scream of pleasure when the clamps on his tender nipples were tightened. His blush deepened. He hoped noone was trying to find him, or if they were, that they weren't close.
"So smooth," she almost moaned, hands roaming his body, making him sort of squirm again. She stepped back and threw the whip which wrapped around his waist and pulled herself closer to do some licky stuff with his awesome smelling stomach. Tearing herself away, which proved to be a much more emotional experience than one might imagine, she left.
He stared at where she had gone, confused. He had expected it and even wanted it to go much further than that. 'Fucking broads. Always teases those bitches are.' He was not as turned on anymore.
Jigen perked up when he heard approaching footsteps. This time, the chick had a bright plastic thing with her which she placed on the ground near him. He understood everything now. With him being bound to the wall and everything, it would be hard to have crazy hot whip sex with them being on different levels. It was a flaw in the plan. She should have tied him closer to the floor.
Several rounds of crazy hot whip sex later, the girl sat leaning against the wall, panting breaths quieting as she regained her breath and lit up a cigarette.
Jigen tried to contain his jealousy with a heavy gulp. "Hey," he started softly, addressing the girl and not the cigarette which took much self-control. Talking wasn't the thing he usually did after something like that, but he had to admit that he admired her courage. And her thong.
"Yeah?"
"I never saw it."
The woman looked up at him, clearly confused. "What?"
"You know." Jigen blushed and averted his eyes, uncomfortable with saying it. "Your woman thingy."
"Oh." The woman also blushed and looked away in embarrassment. "I should tell you something."
Jigen looked back over at her. "What?" he asked in a gentle voice, having the gripping feeling he was starting to care about her.
"I..." Her lip trembled as she hid her face in her hands. "I don't have a woman thingy."
Jigen's mouth hung open without comprehension. "Wha-"
"I'm a man, Jigen!" Her eyes--which suddenly seemed so much deeper--endless even; an endless see of glittering onyx--much more glittering than ever before when he stared right into them--teared up as she turned away and began to walk when he didn't respond.
"Wait," Jigen mouthed, too shocked to say it out loud. "Wait!" He ripped his arms away from the wall with a grunt, followed by his legs. Gathing more strength than he even wanted to, he went so far as to take off the nipple clamps too. He stumbled and fell on his face, but that didn't stop him from getting up again. He had to know who that man was. With force and motivation, he was able to catch up and grabbed the man, harshly whipping him around. Reaching out to the cowering man, he untied the mask which fell to the floor like a plastic bag in the wind.
"Goemon," he breathed.
Tears welled up in Goemon's eyes--the deep space of licorice swimming in the sea of glittering onyx that were his eyes--as Goemon tore himself away from Jigen and ran off.
"Fuck," Jigen muttered. That was why he didn't like chicks, though this one wasn't a chick per se. Or a chick at all. Could pass for one, though.
Back at the hideout, Goemon sat cross-legged on the ground, going between trying to meditate and saying his Shinto or whatever stuff under his breath. 'Forgive me, sensei,' he pleaded mentally, tears running down his rosy cheeks. 'Forgive me for betraying my friend. Forgive me for liking him in impure ways.' Goemon shook his head. He just couldn't stop thinking about Jigen. He couldn't for a while. Goemon had kept it in so long, it had all burst out in an act of desperation. But after those rounds of crazy hot whip sex, he didn't think he could ever stop loving Jigen. He shuddered to realize he realized he was still holding the whip. Freaked out, he threw it across the room where it flopped around until it landed at his feet. 'Wait...' He squinted, realizing those weren't his feet. Those were Jigen's! He sat frozen still, gazing up at his friend in fear.
"Oriental man," Jigen whispered softly, kneeling down to Goemon's level so that their eyes were level. His hand brushed against Goemon's cheek, the tears disappearing in an instant. The more Asian looking man felt like the breath was being knocked out of him as he was pulled against the fedora wearing man, their lips shoved together like an arranged marriage between two parties who were more than willing. Still, he shoved Jigen away, lowering his head. His raven black hair covered his eyes, concealing any crying he might be doing. "This is wrong. I know you hate me now, so don't even bother with me." Restraining a sob, the samurai ran off, not turning his head while the hair flowed like a river behind him to see his beloved being all sad and stuff too.
"What's up with you guys?" Goemon appeared to be sulking and hardly touching his food while Jigen didn't seem hungry at all and only sat there, not looking to be in a great mood. It had been a long time since Lupin had been at such an awkward meeting of dinner eating. "Goemon, I got some of that fishy junk you like. You can even eat it with soy sauce!" He shoved the stuff at Goemon who didn't respond. "Hey Jigen, we got a newspaper today. Did you know? It was still outside, so..." Lupin trailed off, still not getting any answer. He sighed. "Fine," he shouted, standing, "If you guys are gonna be all pissy, Fujiko and I will just leave you too pissy little children alone. Come on, Fujiko." Fujiko, who was sitting next to Jigen, agreed, feeling strangely turned on. She still pretended to be mad at them, however, before storming off with Lupin.
"Look, I know you hate me, so why don't I just leave?" Goemon yelled after them, ready to storm off before something gripped his arm. A hand.
"I don't hate you."
Teary-eyed, Goemon turned until their eyes met--an astral glowing of the meeting of brown and pitch black. "What am I to you? You can't keep playing games with me."
Jigen sighed. "I know, but it's only cause I love you." He blushed a bright red, having blurted it out completely by accident.
"Love?" Goemon repeated slowly as if not knowing what the word meant in his unsureness.
Jigen hadn't actually thought about loving Goemon or not, but he nodded anyway since he'd already said it. "I love you, Goemon." He brushed Goemon's raven black locks, his fingers combing through them as they made out once more, this time tears of happiness flowing down from Goemon's eyes--which were closing, the public no longer able to admire their glittering beauty. Suddenly, the suit wearing man's lips parted from his own still injured ones. He knew Jigen hated him! He started to cry again when his hand was gripped. He looked down in confusing, not recognizing the pose.
"Goemon Ishikawa the Thirteenth..." Fumbling with something in his pocket, which made Goemon give a teary giggle, he took out a round shiny thing and slipped it onto Goemon's finger. "Will you marry me?"
"What?" Goemon bordered on hyperventilation. "YES!" he shouted, jumping into Jigen's arms. He was going to be Mrs. Daisuke Jigen. His wishes had truly come true.
"I have just one condition."
Goemon tensed. "What's that?"
"Never take this off," Jigen answered and pulled on the strap of Goemon's man thong.
"For you," Goemon complied in a content whisper, the truth being that he never planned to remove it regardless.
THE END
