Lost and found

Introduction

I was finally able to step outside the house again, the bruises on my forehead and the cuts in my cheek had finally faded away. I was happy to be feeling my only positive emotion left, the others were safely locked far away in my head, I had complete control. It was necessary, if I was still capable of hope, fear or even love I wouldn't have lasted a minute in this hell that my life has been. When I stood up this morning and walked over to the broken mirror in my room, tripping over the floorboards that lay dangerously loose on the floor and as I carefully examined my reflection I felt the emotion wash over me, relief. My father didn't allow me out the house looking as if he beat me, not that it wasn't true, but he couldn't risk his reputation as a business man, it would ruin him if his daughter was spotted with an heavily damaged face. He had spread the news I was sick every time, the first couple of times I had tried to escape the house, but the doors were locked and there were no keys in the house, the windows were about 10 meters from the street and that was a little too high for me to jump. I hurried to get my clothes on and I walked downstairs silently, trying not to wake him, and ate my breakfast even more silent, I walked over to the hallway and was relieved to see the key hanging on the nail on the wall, he knew I was healed, I was allowed outside.

I took the few last steps in the direction of my freedom, last night I finally made the decision, this had been going on long enough. It had all started with my birth, my mother died while giving birth to me and my father lost it and had to go to therapy to cope with it, he had always hated me for taking her away. I had an older sister, Stephanie, she took care of me when my father wasn't able to, she was a few years older than me, but when I turned six she disappeared, my father had always told me she ran away, but I didn't believe him even though he never lied to me, which was pretty strange, I could sense very easily when someone lied to me, so or he had a very good poker face or didn't lie. I believed she was dead, murdered by my father, thank goodness I couldn't be afraid anymore. I was going to do something about my terrible situation. I stepped outside and walked through the garden, the leaves were colouring and the flowers had lost their freshness, if the garden hadn't reminded me of so many bad memories it would have been nice to look at, but in my opinion the garden had been more similar to the gates of hell, when I was younger I did everything to avoid going through the gates of hell to enter the hell that my house was, complete with the devil himself. I walked through the gate onto the street, it was a bit chilly, but I was too excited to feel the cold.
There was only one problem: if I had gained my freedom, would I be able to open the lock to my emotions? I truly didn't know.

I hadn't made up my mind about how I was going to fight for my freedom, there was something I really wanted, I wanted to hurt my dad physically; I hated that man so much, but how?
Option one: A gun, but I couldn't steal one since I had no experience in stealing or buy one since I was too young.
Option two: A knife, that would do the job perfectly if only I knew how to fight, that creature that couldn't be defined as a man was stronger than me.
Option three: Run away, that would only work if I had somewhere to go which was surely not the case.

Before I could think over option four, I bumped into a man who was standing on the sidewalk, I had been so lost in thoughts that I didn't even notice him standing here, I muttered an excuse, not really feeling sorry for the man, he could have said something to me when he saw me coming, no human was nice, I hated my own spiecies. I looked up and was surprised to see that this man was looking to the sky, staring was a better definition because his eyes were jumping out of his head. I looked around us only to see more people standing like that, some had dropped their purses in shock and others were looking with complete horror on their faces. Someone started screaming and other screams quickly followed, they started running towards the direction I had just came from and the man knocked me on the floor when trying to escape. I fell down and quickly sat up to look at the sky, something terrible had happened; an airplane had flown into one of the twin towers and right now my actual forth option came falling from heaven, though that was certainly not the place where I was probably going. At least I hadn't had to put effort in it.
Those were my last thoughts as a piece of airplane wing was falling down to the exact spot I was sitting.