Hello! So I would just like to say this is a story I had originally planned out in 2005/6 and I'm finally getting around to polishing it enough to post. I stopped writing and reading ff for a long time and now I'm back as an escape from school which caused 2013 to be my most angst and depression filled year ever. Things have improved slightly but I'm still just trying to finally graduate. So enjoy the random stories that will be coming out randomly in the near future!
Sakura stared out of her bedroom window at the night sky with sore eyes. She was exhausted but sleep was impossible. She glanced at the alarm clock which solely occupied the table next to her bed. Her eyes were dry and her vision was blurred but she could make out the dull red light announcing the time of 9:46. It was still early but having not slept once in the past three days, time didn't really matter. She sat up slowly, feeling dizzy, and looked at the window surface, eyes half shut. She focused on the rain, roughly pelting the window pane and watched the drops slide down the glass and gather into larger trails as they fell and pooled on the sill. She stood shakily and walked into her dark hallway and down the stairs, gripping the hand rail and still concentrating on the sounds of the rain hitting her roof. She grabbed a thin sweater that was draped over the bottom of the banister and shrugged it on. Quietly, she opened her front door and stared at the puddles forming at the bottom of her stairs. She stepped out of the house and closed the door, not bothering to lock it behind her. She walked a few feet and was quickly drenched under her paper thin sweater, though she didn't notice. She slipped into an alley, focused on getting away unnoticed. The neighbourhood Sakura lived in was a private one. There were ten or so houses on the block, all lived in by affiliates of her father. She passed by a few houses, avoiding the lights still shining through the windows. She reminded herself that it was still early and that most people would still be awake for hours yet. She hoped not to run into any such people and continued quicker down the alley.
She felt a bit relieved when she reached the end of the brick wall that enclosed her block, and saw the bright lights of the shop lined streets across the way. She stepped around the entrance and came face to face with a tall shadow. She stared at him without the smallest hint of surprise.
"Sasuke, what…" She trailed off, lacking emotion in her voice.
Rain weight flattened his unruly black hair, dripped down his thick bangs and left thin streams down his cheeks and chin. His woollen black pea coat looked soaked through as well as his black slacks and she wondered how long he had been wandering outside in the rain himself.
"I saw you leave the house." He replied, hands in his coat pockets.
"Oh." There was no surprise in her bland answer.
He turned his head to stare at her, his black eyes reflected specks of red and green, blue and yellow, from the lights across the street. His mouth was a slack line and his eyes were impossible to read.
"Let's take a walk."
He turned in the direction Sakura intended to go and took a few slow steps until Sakura made her way to his side.
They crossed the road and made their way along the lighted street in silence, passing by the odd person, running to escape the downpour.
"You could have told me you wanted to go out." Sasuke commented after a few minutes of silent walking.
"I didn't want to bother you." Sakura replied, staring at her feet as they moved, directing her attention to anything but the young man walking beside her.
"You know it's no bother." He sounded a bit annoyed, like they'd been over the subject multiple times before.
"I guess I wasn't thinking." She said quietly.
"You haven't been at all lately."
She looked up at him and cringed. She knew he was going to lecture her, one of the reasons why she had been trying to get out unnoticed. "And how would you feel?"
Sasuke stopped suddenly and grabbed Sakura's arm, lightly yanking her towards him. Clenching her forearms, he leaned over her making sure he had her attention. "I know it hurts. You know I've gone through the same thing." Sakura's eyes widened and she suddenly felt ashamed. Sasuke continued, "If you've forgotten, he took me in when my family was murdered, he treated me like a son. Do you think you're the only one feeling lost?" He didn't yell but Sakura could feel his frustration through his grip and see it in his eyes. He stared at her with his unfaltering gaze, daring her to find something to say back, as he always did.
Sakura wavered and broke under his glare, dropping her head. Her body began to quiver, partially from the cold, mostly from fighting her tears for so long which began to fall, mixing with rain water as they fell against the concrete. She gripped Sasuke's elbows tightly, trying to will all of her feelings into him.
"I'm sorry." Her voice was a hoarse cry.
Sasuke lifted her chin to wipe at her drenched face roughly with his calloused palm. "Don't be sorry; just stop acting like you have nothing left."
Sakura said nothing, feeling weak. Her head lolled to the side and she cringed, hiding her face behind an arm, tears still flowing.
Sasuke sighed exasperatedly, his voice giving way to frustration. "You can't keep living day to day like this."
I just… Don't know what to do any more." Sakura mumbled.
"It's hurting your friends and family, seeing you like this." He softened his tone, "It's hurting me. Don't you care?" He brought her chin up once again to make sure she was looking at him when he spoke.
She was visibly surprised by the gentle voice he spoke to her in. Sakura knew Sasuke cared about her; he showed it through his actions daily, but rarely did he verbally give any signs that she was important to him or that she affected him in anyway. Where she wore her feelings, for the most part, on her sleeve, Sasuke locked them away deep in the recesses of himself. At that moment he sounded genuinely hurt and she looked into his eyes and knew that he meant it.
She brought a hand up to gently caress his cheek. "The last thing I'd ever want to do is hurt you, Sasuke." She replied seriously, her eyes emanating affection.
Sasuke scoffed lightly at her emotional display, the way he always did when she caught him off guard in such a way. "Then stop avoiding everyone. Get out of your room." He paused before adding, "And not the way you did tonight." He moved away from her hand but offered her his arm in turn. She took it, threading her arm through his.
"Alright." She replied quietly. She rested her head on his arm as they walked slowly back in the direction they had come from and for the first time that week, she smiled, feeling only inexplicable love towards the boy who led her home.
Sasuke glanced down at her as they walked, his lips parted slightly as if he wanted to say something. Normally he would scoff and tell her to cut it out but the way her lips curled peacefully into a smile and her eyes fluttered shut as he pulled her along with him, told him to just let her be.
They walked in silence the rest of the way. Soon Sakura's white picket fenced house came into view and she bit her lip, not ready to be out of Sasuke's company yet. He walked her up the path and to her door. Sakura let go of Sasuke's arm and turned toward him.
"Goodnight" she said warmly, giving him a coy smile and playfully tilting her head to the side. She held back from any more physical interaction, knowing she had already exceeded her quota that night. Besides, she knew even her small flirtatious gestures got to him.
"Lock your door." Sasuke commanded ignoring the adorable expression she was giving him.
"I will." She smiled, opening the door. "Oh, and Sasuke," she said, halting him as he walked down the short steps, "thank you."
"Hn." He mumbled and continued walking.
Sakura closed and locked the door behind her, grumbling as she peeled off her wet shoes and sweater, tossing them on the floor. She walked upstairs feeling suddenly lonely and wished she'd invited him in. Though knowing Sasuke, he would have said no. For her emotional stability it was a question better left unasked, not that she wasn't used to his rejection. Usually, trying to sneak a hug took precision and planning, just getting close enough was like trying to break into Fort Knox. It was nothing new to her now that they were 22, and it had been almost 10 years of brush offs.
When she reached her room, she sat on the bed and stared out her window. She watched Sasuke walk up the steps of his own home a little ways down the street. When Sasuke had moved out of Sakura and her father's house at 16, her father arranged for him to live "Far enough that he feels like he's a big man living on his own but close enough that we can keep an eye on him" He had said it with a smirk and a twinkle in his eyes. Sakura would often stare out of her bedroom window at the soft light from the lamp in his own bedroom's window. The curtains were always drawn so she couldn't see in but she felt a little bit of happiness when the lights went off and she knew he was safe and getting some rest.
Tonight his lights went out quickly and she smiled. Sakura got up and peeled off her wet garments, slipping into one of Sasuke's old shirts. She lay down and drifted off to sleep.
Sasuke lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. He wasn't very tired and anyway, he was too preoccupied with thinking about her. For the past few days, she had been a self-destructive train wreck and for him, watching her was like dying inside. Sasuke couldn't blame her though; her father had just been murdered and they were still trying to track down who had done it. Sasuke was suddenly overcome by anger, even after all his attempts at completely quelling his grief. Kizashi had been his second father after his own family was taken from him. Recalling the events of the tragedy used to be so traumatic he would shut down for weeks. Kizashi treated him like family. He didn't rush him but waiting patiently for Sasuke to return to the land of the living. It had been nearly 10 years since that day and the memories were fuzzy at best and the pain was dulled to a point where he no longer thought about it every day. Next to the loss of Kizashi, nothing really competed at this point. He crossed his arms over his face and sighed in disbelief, hating the world. He reconsidered that maybe he had been an asshole to Sakura earlier. She did nothing but try to soothe him when he was going through his pain and all he did was push her away for over a year. Hell, he was still pushing her away. Yet he all but slapped her out of her mourning only days after the incident, just so he wouldn't feel so terrible watching her.
'I'm such a fucking asshole…' he thought angrily, pulling at his hair.
Tomorrow they had important affairs to take care of, including finding out what free shit was left to him in Kizashi's will. At the moment, all he felt he deserved was to be pistol whipped across the face.
A lot of unexplained events, I know, it will unfold itself eventually. Here's hoping to an update every couple weeks?
