A/N: Hi all. So this is my first time writing a Fanfiction so please let me know what you think. Also a big thank's to Seaxofxroses for helping me with editing and talking me into actually posting something.

[words] = yellow thought boxes

{words} = white thought boxes

Disclaimer: I own no character's mentioned in this story

Peter wasn't entirely sure how he had ended up in his current situation. Well, he understood how it happened but swore to whatever gods who may be listening (probably the Nordic ones) that this was the product of some cruel and unusual curse. Maybe he could talk to Doctor Strange if he managed to survive this with his sanity intact.

Because for the next six weeks, Peter was increasing his hand-to-hand training by temporarily working as a S.H.I.E.L.D. field agent (under the recommendation of Captain America). What he had forgotten was that S.H.I.E.L.D. agents were given partners. What he hadn't counted on was that his partner would be Deadpool.

-Two days earlier-

Spider-man sat leaning against the wall at the top of a building, trying to decide whether or not he should remove his mask for a minute while he was up there. It had been a quiet afternoon, there had only been one man trying to rob an old lady but he had run away the second Peter made an appearance. So he just sat there wondering whether or not he should call it a night, when there was an explosion on the other side of town.

Suddenly becoming alert, Peter flung himself off the building, silently praying, as he did every time he jumped off a building, that his web shooters wouldn't fail him. Swinging towards the explosion his spidey senses started going haywire. By the time he made it to the building that had exploded he was surrounded by smoke and rubble and there was still nothing to indicate who had blown the building up. A scream echoed through the area, ripping through the sound of everything around him. The scream was of course coming from the just blown up building.

"I bet my lunch this is a trap…" Peter muttered to no one in particular, but continued into the building anyway. So maybe his Aunt May still liked to make him lunch every now and then, even though he lived alone in an apartment right now. There was nothing wrong with that.

Climbing up to the third floor window, he approached the area of the building where the scream had come from and climbed in through the broken window. He barely even felt the shards of glass ripping through the thin fabric of his suit and becoming embedded in his hands.

Inside the building his vision was limited as ash floated around the room making Peter silently thankful that his mouth was covered by his mask. He could hear crying coming from somewhere near the far corner of the room. As he approached he could see the person- an apparently homeless child going by her appearance- in the area he assumed.

Not a trap then, there was actually a civilian. Though there's still the question of who blew up the building…

"Hey kid? You ok over-" Spider-man began before getting hit upside the head by something suddenly, knocking him of his feet.

He jumped to his feet quickly while clinging to the wall so he could take in his surroundings. The first thing he noticed was that the thing that had hit him was a large metal ball on a chain being wielded by a man in a mostly green suit.

"Thunderball? Seriously the Wrecking Crew is after me again? Didn't you guys already fail at that like three times? I thought you guys were in jail having nap time or something…I don't know, what do you guys actually do in jail?" as he said this Thunderball attacked, slamming his wrecking ball into the wall. Spider-man dodged the attack, throwing a web into the villain's face and kicking him to the ground while he was disoriented.

Before he could proceed with the questioning, Bulldozer came in from nowhere. The large man attempted to ram him with his helmet but luckily spidey dodged, causing the larger man to ram into a wall.

"Well that was really using your head now wasn't it? No that joke was too lame for me to use. So who came up with this 'lure-the-amazing-spider-man-to-a-building-and-hit-him' plan? Was it Norman Osborne? Because I saw him die last week but seriously that guy never stays dead and he really hates me." Spider-man continued before his Spidey sense spiked, alerting him to an approaching danger. He had just enough time to block the attack with his arm as the crowbar came crushing into his wrist, dislocating it and smashing his web shooter. Well, that definitely set his attack plan back a few notches.

The Wrecker swung his crowbar again as Piledriver came into sight behind him. Peter suddenly found himself wishing he didn't work alone. Because he could probably take these guys but it would be easier if Iron Man was with him. Or Captain America. He would also settle for Daredevil's help or even Deadpool's because as much as he hated admitting it, he had helped him with Hit Monkey. Heck he would settle for seeking help from the Brooklyn Avengers at this point. Ok, so he wasn't that desperate.

But he was currently injured, fighting four villains and there was still a kid crying in the corner. He wasn't going to run from a fight but getting the civilian to safety was his top priority. Scooping the kid up in his injured arm spider-man decided it would be best to take out his enemy's vision and get the kid out of here. He was sure the paramedics would be close to the building right about now.

This plan was great but it just so happened that his remaining web shooter broke on him at that moment. He was in shock at the failure of the shooter for a moment but that moment was enough time for Bulldozer to charge. Peter had enough time to put down the kid he was holding, but he didn't have enough time to move out the way. Bulldozer's helmet collided with his stomach with enough force to knock him to the ground, probably breaking some ribs in the process. Yeah, that was going to hurt for a little while.

Spider-man tried to sit up and check on the child. The first thing he noticed was a flash of red, white, and blue. He smiled a little at that (not that you could see under his mask) as Captain America appeared in the doorway, catching his shield effortlessly. He ran into the room hitting the villain closest to him with his shield as Iron man came blasting in through the window like he owned the place. The two made quick work of the Wrecking Crew between Cap's shield and Tony's repulsors.

"Iron man, take the child out to the paramedics" Steve instructed the man next to him. He waited until the two of them had left before giving Spider-man a stern look, but it was filled more with concern then anger. "Spider-man…are you ok?"

"You know me, I'll live. But I think I might have broken something." Trying to get up, he gasped in pain "Ok, several somethings. Including my web shooters…Do you think Iron man will help me fix them?"

Glancing around to make sure no one was around Captain America turned back to him "Peter, I'm being serious, are you ok? If this is what happens when you don't have your web shooters… Have you actually had any formal training in combat?"

Peter looked away, unable to meet the older hero's eyes "Not exactly…"

"Look, you know you have always been like a son to me, but more to Tony. He won't say anything but he came straight here when J.A.R.V.I.S. said you were injured. Nick Fury told me to offer you a mission. I wasn't going to but now it seems that you could do with some proper training. Now I know you don't like to leave town, but I promise we will keep the city safe. You're a good person, a good hero and I'm sure that with a bit more training you can also be a responsible hero. So, will you take the mission, if not for my sake, for Tony's?" Steve finished, staring at him expectantly at the end.

Peter wanted to say yes but the first thing out his mouth was "Will you sign my yearbook? I mean yeah, I'll take the mission. Also…"

"Also?"

"Between you and me, Tony feels the same." Peter finished with a smile, before trying to stand and falling over. Steve helped him back to the S.H.I.E.L.D. base for his debriefing.

"So, for this mission it will involve you being in a remote location for the next six weeks. You will be looking into a new organization that has come to our attention in recent years. The organisation is called 'Vitriolum' and we believe they are a sub group of A.I.M. and may pose a threat to the safety of the way we live. I need you to infiltrate them, but don't be seen. I need you to find as much information on them as you can and if you can, stop them. I wish you luck on your mission. You will be meeting you partner on location. You are dismissed." And with that, Nick Fury finishes his speech.

"Wait, partner? You never said I would have a partner on this mission."

"It's S.H.I.E.L.D. son. Every agent has a partner or team. Or at the very least a handler somewhere close by."

"But you said this mission would take six weeks. You mean I need to tell someone my secret identity?" Peter said trying his hardest to look horrified under his mask.

"You think I would send you on mission with someone who I didn't think you could trust with your secret identity?" Fury said, raising one eyebrow and one eye patch.

"So who are you partnering me with then?" Peter asked with a slightly defeated sigh.

"Deadpool. Rest up tomorrow, you'll meet him on location the next morning."

Spider-man cannot be held responsible for the line of insults he gave in response to this as he left Fury's office. Needless to say he was still going.

So this is more or less where our story started.

Peter was led to a private jet by a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent in a nice suit, dressed fully in his spider-man suit.

He hopped on the plane trying to think about what the next few weeks would be like. It's not like he hated Deadpool or anything. He just wasn't good at holding onto friends and didn't need another person to loose. But as long as Deadpool didn't try to needlessly kill anyone it should be ok.

Somewhere amongst all his thoughts Peter drifted off to sleep. He was woken by the same agent from earlier and told to follow the directions and go to the address on the piece of paper he was then handed. After that he was kicked out of the plane that flew off without telling him anything more.

He did as instructed because he really didn't know what else to do. There was a reason he didn't like spies. It was around early afternoon when he reached the address on the map. He could hear movement inside but his spidey senses would have told him if it was dangerous so decided that, against his better judgement, he should knock on the door. Peter tried to stifle his laugh as he heard someone fall over inside before they unlocked the door.

He stared at the masked face in front of him in a moment of awkwardness. Deadpool stood in the doorway in full costume, with no weapons on him except the gun in his hand. Peter assumed the crashing noise had been the mercenary looking for a weapon before answering the door.

"Spider-man? What are you doing here? I didn't think we'd get another crossover so soon…" Deadpool trailed off.

"What? Actually never mind. Did Fury forget to mention to you that where teaming up and living together for the next six weeks?" Peter sighed.

"I thought that was a dream"

[A really really good dream]

"What do you mean by that?"

[Like you don't know. You did ask if we could stay at his spidey-cave in the last team up]

{Shh- We should probably let him in now}

"Great idea white! Umm so spider-man do you want to come inside?" Wade said stepping out the way to let the younger in.

Walking through the door, Peter looked at the other man "So, how often do you talk to yourself?"

"Hard to say, how often do you?" The merc replied, shutting and locking the door behind him.

The silence that filled the room was awkward and painfully long. Ok, so it lasted about twenty seconds but hey, this was a room with deadpool in it, the silence just wasn't meant to be there.

"So does the amazing and spectacular Spider-man know what's going on or why we're here? Because I just got shot at and woke up with a note saying that I will get my mission soon." Wade said to break the silence.

"S.H.I.E.L.D. wants us to take down some bad guys. An organisation connected to the Advanced Ideal Mechanics. And I don't know where we are." Peter explained with his limited knowledge.

"I swear A.I.M. is connected to almost everything. I mean if they ever teamed up with Hydra they would control most the criminal underworld."

{Didn't something like that happen in one of Matt's comics?}

"Probably, Daredevil gets all the cool arcs." Wade muttered, causing another awkward silence.

"Do you want to turn on the TV or something? Looks like we have some DVD's over there…" Peter said, partially worried that the other would start shooting things if he got to bored.

"What have we got to watch?"

Walking over to where the DVD's where spider-man continued in confusion "Well there's a whole lot of…Disney movies? And little kids cartoons. What on earth was Fury thinking?"

"Maybe it was actually Mystique having one over on you? This could all be part of some elaborate plan set up by Magneto to get heroes out of the city so he can do something really evil!"

"…Deadpool, that actually kind of made sense. Which scares me a little. But they would take out Captain America and Iron man if they wanted heroes out of the city. Also you're not actually considered a hero by anyone."

"Ouch…right in the feels there" Wade said, placing a hand over his chest as though he had been shot "I thought you good guys were meant to be nice to everyone?" he continued before sitting down on the couch.

"Don't you read the 'Daily Bugle'? I'm a public menace not a good guy." Spider-man stated, sitting rather slowly onto the couch. His ribs hadn't exactly healed from his run in with the Wrecking Crew. Or his wrist for that matter.

Wade noticed the younger hero wince in pain a little as he sat down but decided not to ask about it. Not yet at least. So maybe he and spider-man had only done a few crossovers but he knew enough about the younger to know that if he tried to get him to open up to quickly he would probably get punched in the face. "So, speaking of Captain America and Iron man, are they sleeping together or what?"

Spider-man gave a bit of a laugh at that "The two of them have secretly been in love for years and everyone sees it but them."

[Sounds like someone else we know]

{Oh, be quiet. You're going to ruin the surprise.}

[But it's so obvious what's happening]

"Hey Spidey, do you think it's possible for the boxes in your head to conspire against you?" Deadpool asked suddenly.

"With you, nothing would surprise me at this point." Peter sighed.

"Oh I'm sure I could find something to surprise you. Like have you ever seen a man juggle five guns…I never actually tried that but I could probably do it. Or I could eat like, a whole lot of pancakes at the same time."

"I think I could eat more pancakes then you." Peter replied smirking under his mask.

"Oh? Was that a challenge, baby boy?"

"Why, afraid you'll lose?"

"Wait- are we flirting? Or bantering at least? There appears to be a significant amount of banter here. Well at least you're not shooting me in the face with my own gun."

"Trust me deadpool, if you annoy me enough, I'm shooting myself in the face with your gun."

"No you're not. If you do that Captain America and Iron man will skin me alive. Then they will proceed to torture me for a long time, then give my remains to your friends and family."

Spider-man gave a hollow laugh at that "Lucky for you that's only like six to ten people"

"What, don't you have a long list of girls who want to be your girlfriend or something?" Wade asked, turning to his side so he could look at the younger.

Counting on is fingers spider-man continued "Well my first girlfriend was killed by one of my enemies…another hated spider-man. There was also one that turned out evil and several that dumped me."

"So I guess I don't need to worry about you bringing any girls back to the place then? Just getting it out in the open at the start of this partnership, I don't need to worry about you bringing any men home do I? Because it's ok if I do, I walked in on those two from the Young Avenger's making out once and it was a little shocking because they're only like sixteen but I'm still totally cool if your web swings both ways-"

"Deadpool, stop talking." Peter cut him off.

"I mean I'm just saying that it's all ok."

"I'll keep that in mind, Watson."

"Wait, you're a fan of BBC Sherlock?" Deadpool probably sounded a little too happy at that.

"Admit it you only watch it for Irene Adler, right?" Peter questioned the Merc.

"Yep! Oh and for the Johnlock." Deadpool said with a nod.

The two ended up laughing at that, settling into a comfortable silence. It was weird for Peter to think but maybe living with deadpool wouldn't be as bad as he thought. And maybe there was a gas leak somewhere nearby that was messing with the way he perceived things.

"You know it has to happen soon right?" Wade suddenly said. Peter wasn't sure if the other was talking to him until Wade turned to him.

"What does?" Peter asked.

"We need to take these costumes off. Show each other our faces. And if we're going to explore the area today, we're going to have to do it in casual clothes because your costume sticks out like a sore thumb."

"My costume? Your outfit is a lot more obvious. I mean red and black?"

"Spidey, you're missing the point."

"Not missing, avoiding. There's a difference."

"Spider-man, this is hard for both of us but we need to find out where we are."

"Ok, so do you have any casual clothes?"

"There are two bedrooms over this way. They got suitcases in them which I'm gonna assume have clothes in them. Either that or there are hit men waiting to kill us in our sleep." Wade explained, leading Peter towards the hallway.

For the first time since entering, spider-man really took in the establishment. It was a small place, there was the lounge room which led to the kitchen and from there was a hallway that led to two bedrooms opposite each other and a bathroom at the end of the hallway.

Going into their separate rooms, Peter discovered that the bag did in fact have casual clothes in it and an envelope of money for wherever country they were in.

Peter slipped jeans, a long sleeved shirt and a hoodie over his spidey suit, putting his gloves and money in his pocket. He heard the mercenary open his bedroom door with a loud squeak by proceeding to knock on his door.

Peter looked down at the mask in his hand before sighing and sticking it in his pocket. He stood for a moment longer before opening the door.