Chapter 1

"Come at me bro!" I mean there is no really smooth way to enter into a scene, but why not roll right into the world with an overused battle cry of drunken frat boys and muscle bound beasts as they drown themselves in "Creatine" and "bulk-up" products. Enter a cosmic douchebag of the postmodern world, a 6 foot 6 giant with 20 inch biceps and a tank top so intentionally tight you are forced to question the man's sexuality and the basis of his mental status. "I am here to steal your money, and your wife!" the big lug started flexing profusely as he leaned toward the storeowner's wife. Yeah, this story does not begin with a hero, or even a fancy accident, or even some love born vendetta, but simply a weird incident involving a guy looking to score…and score.

"Here...take it." The shopkeeper held out a small bag full of money, it was a measly sum, so measly that the callous tool-bag barely even took notice as he without taking his eyes and extended lips searching for a kiss from the destressed damsel off his target as grabbed the bag with a silly flexed pose.

"Come on baby! Give Big Rhino a kiss!" He leaned in hard to gain tasty kiss on the lips of the woman. His sloppy advances caused her to faint as he with his eyes closed slammed his head into the wall, breaking several of his teeth. "AHHHHH! MY TEETH!" he said in muffled voice as he, still while flexing as hard as he could. Tears started rolling down his face as he jittered about the store. "WHAT THE HELL, MY TEETH!" he pulled his hands back and looked into the window glass to see his jagged reflection. He then smashed the window as he was unpleased with the visual the glass displayed.

"Serves you right." The shop keep muttered under his breath in slightly too loud a voice to where the vascular giant could still hear. He gaze shifted hard with eyes ablaze. He trotted over and pushed the man against the wall. "What did you say, BITCH!" he said intentionally annunciating extra syllables in order to spray blood dripping from his mouth on the poor guys face.

"Well…" the keeper suddenly grew bold. "I mean come on if you were using that much force to try and kiss my wife then I think you should have seen something like this coming. Besides what's with the skin tight shirt, it seems impractical for winter." Rather than take reflection of stock of the situation and notice his own responsibility at the issue of his teeth, the giant simply grunted as a wild boar flailing in mud during mating season, and then clenched his right fist with every bit of strength his protein-powered arms could produce.

"I'm gonna treat you like a red-headed stepchild!" the beast angrily spewed as he began to do what every failure as a villain does in the middle of any heinous act, relish in it.

"So you're going to ignore me?" The words further enraged the moronic narcissist. The time had come and he went for the right hook. The shopkeeper's shirt tore off right at that moment and he dropped to the floor at just the right moment to avoid the punch.

"CRASH!" the giant crushed his hand into the wall. Blood shot forth from his hand and his crushed fingers sent signals of extreme pain rushing into his brain. His eyes burst forth in agony as the beast's juiced body took a few seconds to acknowledge and register the pain. It seems steroid and muscle milk does more than just build a body it also shrinks the mind. "AHHH MY HAND! MY HAND!"

"Would you like a towel for that hand of yours?" the employee said with no emotion as his assailant jumped about in a frantic panic of "OWHIES." The big guy used the shirt still in his hand to begin bandaging his hand up in a version of homeless style triage. "Oh look, now we match!" the shopkeeper said noticing the fact that with his top shirt removed, both of them were in skin-clad tank tops. The giant was getting frustrated with the situation, three of his teeth were in the wall, his right hand was smashed to bits, and he was barely holding a bounty of 1000 yen. He realized that this was a futile errand at this point and knew he needed to get out of their while he was still free and breathing.

"I'll be back for you BITCH!" he exclaimed while pointing wildly at the man. As he pointed there was an awkward pause…until the exit sign above the door crashed atop his head creating a solid knot on the big guy's forehead.

"Oh I've been meaning to tighten that sign." The clerk said as the giant just wallowed in awkward humiliation at his uncanny bad luck in this robbery. Despite all of these failures and pain, he was still pleased to get the money and make out free and clear…except for many new bruises and scars. He turned around quickly and pushed the door with as much force as he could muster to escape the den of atrocious luck still in one piece. As he exited the store the clerk still feeling oddly emboldened figured he give one final snarky remark to the injured beast. "See you next sir!" he called as the door closed behind the huge man. The words stuck into his ears like daggers of insults, and the man was sent further into a fiery rage so hot steam could be seen pouring forth from his ears. He flexed further to the point any normal person would force a coronary artery to burst from the pressure as he turned around. Now, it was personal and he was not about to give up conquering that store and the snarky man inside.

"WATCH OUT!" a loud call could be heard all the way down the busy street as the big man blinded by rage failed to hear the desperate call…or simply believed it to be in reference to his own prowess and not that he was in any way under some form of duress. Seriously, has the world ever produce a more thickheaded numbskull.

"SMACK!" the cyclist crashed into the man with full force flattening the guy completely and knocking him unconscious in the process. This was the completion of his unfortunate luck as an innocent bystander failed to swerve out of his way and bull-dozed him to the ground with his bike. As he lay unconscious on the floor the cyclist shook off the fall as he was thrown from the bike in the crash.

"Thank goodness for protective wear." He said as he arose to his feet. His dress was nothing fancy, it was clear he was a bike courier, a person who ferried important documents and small gifts across town. Thanks to his protective green helmet and elbow and kneepads he was able to arise from the crash fairly easily, unlike the knocked out cold injured gym rat bleeding on the pavement.

From all the commotion a small crowd had surrounded the bike wreck. The shop keeper had emerged and grabbed from the downed fiend the contents he had stolen moments earlier. "Thank you Rider, you're a hero!" the rider was confused as he arose and picked up his bike expecting to have to hustle off to avoid being yelled at by an angry group of onlookers for crashing into the chap. Instead, he was being treated like the newly open heroes of the hero association in the cities. His cheeks turned bright red and he decided to roll with it, despite knowing it was merely an accident. Sure, he always wanted to be a hero, what kid didn't? However, he was not super strong, or agile, or wise. He was just a college dropout who was a courier, what could he offer as a hero? However, the small group was taking to him as they marveled as he took down the big guy. The cops arrived on the scene soon after as the crowd was cooling down, they got the big guy in cuffs and took him to jail. Yet, before everyone cleared off the lead officer came over the young courier and shook his hand.

"You know, it's not every day I get to meet a real hero. Thank you, you're an inspiration." The officer said. The rider was ashamed by the whole situation as it was merely an accident. However, he eventually nodded in thanks to the officer. "I guess you're still new to being a hero, just always remember to be someone worth the little ones looking up to." The officer pointed in the direction of a small child smiling at the rider with eyes the size of an ocean. The child clearly thought the rider was the coolest ever and in some way wished to be just like him in the future. This look further embarrassed the rider, as he felt like nothing but a useless courier. The officer went off with the criminal for processing at the station, while the young man sat on the curb next to his bike thinking.

"I can't be a hero, I'm just me…But that kid…the way he looked at me…isn't that worth everything, giving people something to look toward, or believe in?" the thoughts were pounding the young man's head until he finally reached a firm stance. "Even though I'd love to be a hero to these young ones…I HAVE A JOB!" he stood up as he made this statement showing and proving to himself his firm stance on this issue.

"RINNG! RIINGG!" his phone started chiming at that exact moment breaking his focus and pondering. "Hello Boss!" The call was from his courier service office.

"YOU'RE FIRED!" the two words were all that was yelled as the other side disconnected. Shocked at the turn of events the rider looked to the sky as if he felt it was a nudge of destiny toward this path, the path of heroism.

"Well…I guess I'm gonna be a hero." He said with confusion, hope, and excitement in his voice. Sure its not the greatest way for someone to start their journey toward being a hero, but sometimes its about the simple things, and not some crazy experiment gone wrong or a horrible tragic event shaping someone's life to where they want to wear spandex suits and chase crazy people running about naked. He hopped aboard his bike and rode home to plan for tomorrow.