Believing In Yourself

Chapter One: Damned Once Again

The rain beat down upon the roof of the old cafe that I now worked at. In my hand was the envelope that contained a letter from my boyfriend, Jake. He was the one that was there for me when I needed him the most. He was the only person that understood what I was going through after the day that had changed my life; the day that Ed-Edward left me all alone in the forest. I was so stupid to think that we would last.

I pushed open the door and stepped out into the pouring rain. As fast as I could, I jogged over to my new Chevy truck. Thankfully, my clumsiness had vanished and in place came my form. My hair now cascaded halfway down my back. I grew curves along with breasts that have grown a cup size.

With my keys, I opened the envelope slowly, careful not to rip anything. I pulled the letter out and held it up to see it.

Bella,

Writing this is not easy at all. You know that I will always love you, though not as I did before. Last week, something strange happened to me. As soon as I saw her face, I knew that it was destiny. Isabella, I imprinted on a girl named Emma Dean. She is my life now. I love her with all of my heart and I am afraid that that will never change. She has beautiful silky blonde hair, sparkling blue eyes, and freckles across her nose. I am in love with this woman. She is everything that I hoped for. Please, do not be angry. No matter what happens, you will always have a special place in my heart.

Love always,

Jacob Black

Reading this letter just might have been the worst thing that has ever happened to me. He imprinted.

Jake and I have been together for 2 years. The first year after Ed-Edward left me was too painful to notice the way he looked at me or spoke. I was catatonic for the first two months of that. After I finally emerged from my depression, I started to see things in a new light. I began to see every detail of his face, every single cell of his brain, and all of the feelings that his voice gave me.

When he left me three years ago, it felt as if a huge hole had been punched through my chest. But now, it feels like my heart is shattered into a million and one pieces beyond repair. Jacob had been there for me to fix the gaping hole. But I don't have anyone else. I don't have another mechanic to tape up all of those microscopic crystals.

No tears fell from my eyes, for every emotion had left my body. If I hadn't been sitting on the front driver's seat of my beloved truck, I would have collapsed to the ground. There is no doubt about that.

I switched on the vehicle after several minutes of thinking every one of my options through. There weren't many, but there was still a lot of conflict to sort though. Faster than I had ever dreamed about going, I gunned my black truck out of the empty parking lot and down the street. The water on the road glistened in the little light that the street lamps provided.

I had no certain destination in mind. I just drove wherever the road took me as voices filled my head.

With all of the buzzing going on inside my brain, I wasn't paying attention to where I was going. Before I knew it, my tires were skidding all over the place. I tried to gain control over the wheel. My life literally flashed before my eyes. - Why people built guardrails, I will never know. They were completely useless.

The truck slid over to one and flipped over it. My seat belt snapped as I tumbled around the cab of the pickup. I saw blood everywhere. My blood.

Ever since I could remember, the sight of blood made me light headed and dizzy. Now was one of those times. Every single thing was spinning in circles to the point where the windshield looked as if it were moved to the very back seat. My heart pounded in my chest like a helicopter. The truck finally stopped rolling down the hill when it hit a large old tree. The front tire that hadn't came off was leaning against the tree. With a groan of protest from the metal, the entire frame rolled back over until it was now upside down.

I ended up lying on the roof of my truck. I rolled to my side and vomited pools of blood. As I moved, I felt a sharp pain in my side. An ear-piercing scream erupted from my throat. I was in so much pain, it was unbelievable! I could hardly breath. The lack of oxygen caused my already unbearable dizziness to magnify and increase.

Somehow, I must have blacked out, because I woke up to the smell of gasoline. The scent was intoxicating and if it wasn't raining, I'm sure I would have passed out a second time. I could smell smoke somewhere in the distance.

When I opened my eyes, I could faintly make out the flickering flame of a fire that had now engulfed the entire bed of the truck as I stared out the back window. This is it. There is no way that I am making it out of this alive. The oxygen from the rain would just fuel the raging inferno. I could already feel the heat coming from the fire from inside the truck.

Broken glass was everywhere! It was under me, beside me, behind me, in front of me, and even on top of me. I couldn't move without the glass nicking me somewhere. The windshield was completely busted out.

For a minute, I thought I heard sirens blaring. Then I see the colorful lights flashing. Closer and closer they came until they stopped about 5 yards away. I could just barely see people gathering around and two men coming out the back of an ambulance. A firetruck pulled up to the side of the road. They were coming to save me!

One of the men rushed over to the driver's door that had been ripped off. He tried reaching his arms inside in attempt to get me. When he failed he called over to the other man.

"I can't get to her! Come over here and help me!" he yelled. The second man ran just as the first one did. The two of them worked to reach me but each try lead to failure.

My hopes had gotten a bit too high when I first saw the ambulance. I didn't think about the difficulty getting me out would propose.

Just as I was about to give up on life, I heard a frantic voice.

"Back away! Let me get her out!" The voice yelled. It sounded masculine so I knew that it was another man.

"If we can't, you most likely won't be able to!" The second man argued.

A growl emitted from the last guy. All I could see was his boot-clad feet from my current position. Who the hell wears cowboy boots in Forks? The gasoline had clouded up my mind so much that I couldn't remember where I knew someone like that. I closed my eyes and listened to my surroundings.

"Let me through," he ground out of his teeth. Both men stumbled back. I heard the sound of glass crunching under his feet as he made his way to me.

His arms reached into the cab as he knelt down. One arm slid under my legs while the other one supported my shoulders. He hoisted me up into his arms. His cold arms. Freezing cold arms. Cold.

"Hang in there, Darlin'. Everything's gonna be alright," the voice whispered. My eyes remained closed.

For the rest of the events, I was unconscious.

When I did wake up, I was still a little dazed. I had to blink for a few minutes before I was able to see anything. I gasped when I looked around me. I was now in a hospital room.

For a few minutes, I tried searching my memory but still could not remember when I was taken here. I did, however, remember when I was rescued by someone. I didn't get to look at his face, though.

A nurse walked into the room with a clipboard.

"How are you feeling... Isabella?"

"Just Bella. And I'm still a bit dizzy," I answered as she nodded. She started scribbling down something before she handed me a small plastic cup that contained 3 pills. She then set a water bottle on the counter that was in my reach.

"Take these. You have a broken bone somewhere in your leg. The doctor didn't give specifics on that. You'll be getting x-rays in a short while and then tomorrow, we'll have it reset. Feel better, hun."

After writing a few more things down, she exited the room, leaving me to myself.

I took the medicine and then chugged down the water. The heat of the fire and the smell of gasoline had my mouth very dry.

Does this happen to everyone, or is it just me? I mean, I'm sure that someone else must have had the weirdest hallucinations. Well, whatever. I have no clue as to who got me out of my truck, but whoever it was, I'm gonna have to thank them... if I ever find out who I wanna thank.

This all happened over a stupid letter. Jacob broke up with me in a letter! Who the fuck does that? If he was a real man, he would have told me the truth to my face and not in a fucking letter! I was beyond pissed at that fucking douche bag of a dick! If he was here, he'd be so thankful that he was a very large dog. He'd be thankful that I wasn't a vampire, more so than he already is... or was. I don't think he gives a flying fuck about me anymore. Oh, sure, 'I imprinted!' God, I feel so fucking bad for whoever it is... Emma fucking Dean! He just had to explain her physical appearance to someone who doesn't give a damn! And in a very cheesy, romantic, yet completely disgusting way, too! He is also lucky that the effects of the gas had worn off. If not, I'd go all psycho on his pansy ass, and her's included. I'd hunt everyone down that had that description and I'd chop all of their heads off just in case I miss her somewhere. It was her fault just as much as his.

My phone started buzzing in my purse that was all the way across the room. I knew I couldn't reach that far. Damn it! Why does everything bad happen to me? I was on the verge of a breakdown. I reached an arm out, even though I knew that I would never be able to extend my arm enough. I stared at it as if it would come to me. Maybe I was wrong; I'm not exactly sure if my high from the gas had worn off completely.

Just then, I saw a pale hand reach it and bring over to me. It set my purse on my lap. My gaze traveled up the arm until I was looking at a pair of red eyes.

"Hey there, Darlin'."

OMG! I'm so evil! Can anybody guess who it is? You may be right, you may be wrong, and you may wait until I post chapter two to find out. :-D

Doesn't that remind you of a song? "Hey there, Darlin'" Can you guys guess that one, too? I don't know, really. It is just stuck in my head. Okay, so, um... REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW... or I will kill you in your sleep... just kidding... RRRREEEEVVVVVVIIIIIIIEEEEEEE EEEWWWWWWWWWW! /

The next chapter of "Go To Hell" will be posted next week... I promise! REVIEW!

Farewell, Jazzyers!