Expecting

Author: Alicia

Disclaimer: I don't own JAG. DPB and CBS do.

Summary: Mac, Harm, and the baby deal. Follow-up to Father of the Year

Spoilers: the baby deal

Rating: Let's call it a PG-13 for adult themes.

A/N: I've always been of the opinion that one of Mac's issues is that she has this picture of what her life is supposed to be like and is unwilling/unable to alter that even for something that might be better than what she planned. I'm in no way slamming marriage in this story. I am trying to say that doing things on your own schedule is always better than doing something just because it's what people expect you to do.

A/N2: I also realize parts of this story are not very likely to happen in the JAG universe but guess what? My universe, my rules. If I liked DPB's rules I wouldn't have been so disappointed in Season 8!

February 5th 2005 Mac's Apartment, Georgetown 0700

I open my eyes and stretch. I was up much to late last night packing. I'm moving in with Harm today. I'm starting to drift off again when my internal clock kicks in and I realize Harm will be here in an hour and a half. If I want that long bath, I need to get up now.

I waddle into the bathroom and turn the water on. The bath is about a quarter full before I remember I left the bubble bath out. As I pour some in, I think about the tub at Harm's. I'm so glad Harm remodeled the bathroom in his apartment. I'm pretty sure my pregnant body wouldn't survive until March without baths, nice long baths. Not only did the man remodel his bathroom for me, he found me a nice deep tub for my baths. If that's not love, I don't know what is.

As a lower myself into the water, I think about the step Harm and I are taking later today. Harm's bringing breakfast and Sturgis. Harm and I are moving into together today. Of course most of JAG expected Harm and I to be getting married and buying a house in the suburbs. I remember the first thing the admiral said after congratulations.

~FLASHBACK~

September 2004 Admiral Cheggwidden's Office

"What can I do for you Colonel?"

"I needed to tell you that I'm pregnant sir. I'm due in March."

"Congratulations! When are you and Rabb getting married?"

"Actually sir, we have no plans to get married at the moment."

~Back to the Present~

I have to chuckle at the memory. The admiral's head snapped up so fast I'm surprised he didn't get whiplash! He wasn't the only one. Harriet, Bud, Trish, Frank, Sturgis, and Uncle Matt all had the same reaction. When are you two getting married?

The thing was we hadn't discussed it. Okay, If you look at it the right way, we'd been in a relationship for years. I hadn't dated since Mic left. He hadn't dated since Renee left. We had dinner together a couple of times a week. We went running together. We did couple things but we never called it dating.

Then AJ's fifth birthday came. The deadline discussed in the baby deal. Harm and I talked and we decided we did want to fulfill the baby deal. Neither of us was in a relationship with anyone, except each other but we still weren't admitting what we had was a relationship.

We decided we were going to go about conception the old-fashioned way, at least in the beginning. In vitro is expensive and we decided not to spend the money unless we had to. We understood that it might be necessary. I mean we're both educated professionals we understood that the odds were that it would not be easy to conceive.

Maybe we should buy some lottery tickets. We'd been told it could take up to a year to conceive. It took two months. The funny thing is, we weren't even screwing like rabbits. Okay we weren't exactly following a schedule. I mean come on, it had been a long time for both of us and sex with Harm is a lot of fun.

Of course being who we are, we hadn't discussed anything beyond getting pregnant. Of course as soon as we started telling people about the baby we started getting asked about a wedding. The thing was the more we got asked about a wedding the more problems we started having in the relationship. We both became cranky and defensive. Then Harm got the idea that changed everything. We went and spent a long weekend with his Grandmother.

I was reluctant to go. Harm kept saying it would be fine and we both needed a break, which was true we did. I expected to meet someone else who was going to want to know when Harm and I were getting married. What I got was someone who reminded me of my childhood visits to my own grandmother. ~Flashback~

October 29th 2004 Sarah Rabb's Farm 1900 hours

"Are you okay Mac?"

"I'm fine, Mrs. Rabb."

"Mac, please call me Grams. If you're okay why do you look like you're waiting for the sky to fall on your head?"

"Grams, I'm sure Mac's fine."

"Let the woman speak for herself Harmon." Well now I know who kept Harm in line as a kid and it wasn't Trish.

"I'm just waiting for you to ask us when we're getting married."

"Why? Has Harmon actually proposed?"

"No ma'am but it's what everyone else has wanted to know. They assume since I'm pregnant we're getting married."

"Well the first thing you need to learn is that I'm not everyone else. I think it's wonderful that you're pregnant. I'd given up on living long enough to have great-grandchildren."

"Grams..."

"Be quiet Harmon you're interrupting. As I was saying, I think it's wonderful that you're pregnant but it's not a reason to get married."

"Thank you! That's what we've been telling people." Harm and I both say this at the same time, the exact same time.

"Now just a minute you two, I'm not saying that I don't have some questions and I expect honest answers." Okay, I feel like I'm in high school again and the principal's trying to find out why I missed school yesterday. However, in this case I think I'll try a little honesty instead of a quick 'go to hell!' Something tells me Grams is quite capable of kicking my six and Harm's.

"Now my first question is; Harm do you love Mac?" Oh, boy! She sure doesn't pull any punches. Harm looks like a deer caught in a very large set of headlights.

"Well Harmon answer me."

"No ma'am." Oh shit! That's not the answer I expected. I have to get out of here. Wait Harm's saying something else.

"Actually, Grams I'm in love with Mac. She's my soul mate." Oh my god! I can't believe he said that. He loves me! Snap out of it Mackenzie. Grams is talking to you.

"And you Mac, do you love Harm?"

"I've been in love with Harm for years. I can't remember a time that I wasn't in love with Harm." I glance at Harm and notice he's smiling the biggest, brightest smile I've seen from him in months. I think the last time I saw him smile like that was when we decided to go ahead with the baby deal.

"Now my next question is this: do you both think this is forever?" Oh, she is good.

"Yes, ma'am." I'm impressed. Harm didn't even hesitate.

"Yes, ma'am. I learned the hard way that I'm only happy with him. I tried to do the traditional relationship thing and it didn't work." Looking back, Harm and I have actually been together for a couple of years. We haven't had the same address but we've been exclusive. He's been the most important thing in my life and I daresay, I've been the most important thing in his life.

"Well then, I think you to should do whatever you feel is best for you. No one can tell you that you should get married. You'll know when and if it's the right time to get married. Don't worry about what others are saying. You know what's right for you and your family."

~End Flashback~

I think that was the turning point for us. We spent the long weekend with Grams just relaxing and having fun. When we returned to DC we were both more relaxed and willing to just let our relationship progress at its own pace.

I did have to have a rather strong conversation with Harriet in which I told her that my relationship with Harm was working just fine and that everyone needed to get off our backs. Surprisingly enough it worked!

Bud, Sturgis and the Admiral all took that attitude of if it ain't broke there's no need to fix it. Of course I think part of that with the Admiral is if Harm and I aren't married there's no violation of the UCMJ and he doesn't have to figure out how to keep us both in JAG.

Trish was kind of pushy about wanting Harm and I to get married. I think that Grams had a talk with her during a Christmastime visit we all made to the farm. Harm later told me that during the visit Trish told him that as long as we're happy, she's happy for us. Harm said it was Trish's way of saying she wasn't going to pressure us to get married anymore.

How did we go from where we were to moving in together? I guess it has to do with Harm's Christmas present to me, which I didn't get until New Years. I was offered the chance to go out of town to deliver some lectures between Thanksgiving and Christmas. I was completely shocked when Harm agreed with my decision to accept the TAD. I had told Harm that soon enough I wouldn't be able to travel and felt the need to indulge, even if I only went to Quantico and stayed at the BOQ. Harm told me to enjoy my lectures, have some fun, and call him every night. He also asked that I let him drive me down because he was concerned about my car on winter roads. I agreed because my pregnant body didn't fit behind the wheel of my Vette any more.

We went straight from Quantico to the farm after a detour at the wall on Christmas Eve. When we returned to DC on New Years Eve we went straight to my apartment and spent the night. Then on New Years Day Harm took me to his place to see the last of my presents.

While I had been in Quantico he had gotten Sturgis and some other friends to help him with some remodeling at the loft. He had remodeled the bath room to include a wonderful garden tub. He had also somehow managed to accomplish the enlarging of the apartment to include a small nursery for the baby and had space set aside for a playroom.

What was amazing was that he put no pressure on me. He just told me that he wanted to make sure that the baby and I were as comfortable spending time at his place as my place. I was the one who suggested that maybe it was time to consider moving in together. It took us a month to get things set up but we're going to do it. We're going to take the next step.

Uh-oh it's 0745, I need to get a move on if I'm going to be ready when Harm gets here with Sturgis and the truck. I let the water out of the bathtub and reach for the towel. I need to be dressed and ready. Scratch that I need to be dressed, I am ready to go to take next step in this relationship.

~The End~