"You know, you shouldn't have regenerated so close to the console," I commented from where I was, leaning against the TARDIS' console which still spewed sparks at a furious rate. I inspected my nails, which were painted neon lime-green.
"It didn't cross my mind! Now please help me back up!" the Doctor shouted from where he was barely clinging on to the threshold of the door.
"I don't know . . ." I mused, still thoroughly examining my fingernails for any traces of dirt, "I guess I'll think about it."
"Please, Iridis!" the Doctor screeched fearfully. "I'll get you more nail polish!"
I giggled and pulled him back into the TARDIS. I closed the door behind him, and then leaned against it. "I was going to help you either way. However," I stated, jabbing my finger in his face, "I'm going to hold you to that promise."
The Doctor sighed but raced over to the console quickly.
"We're about to hit the Parliament Clock Tower," I informed him as if it was perfectly normal, leaning against one of the walls casually.
He yelped in surprise and quickly pulled a few levers and pressed a few buttons, which made us fly over Big Ben, rather than crash into it. He gave a joyful shout like a little kid at Christmas, making me roll my eyes. Then he began to dance around the console like a Native American would dance around a bonfire.
I rolled my eyes again and suppressed a snicker, holding my lips together tightly. "I'm going to go change, Doctor. Try not to miss me too much." I lifted my hand above my head and gave him a slight wave of farewell as I walked out of the room.
I heard him mutter something under his breath, but I was too far down the corridor to hear the actual words he had spoken. I pondered over what he might have said, but eventually just gave up. I shrugged; the Doctor was the Doctor, there was no understanding him.
On a less confusing and contradictorily note, I was looking forward to getting to know the new Doctor. It was always an adventure, getting to know the brand new Doctor directly after he regenerated. He became an entirely new person, a new person who already knew me inside and out.
I pushed a random door open and smiled when I found myself in the wardrobe. I knew the TARDIS would take care of me; she always did. I walked into the room, past the threshold, and began browsing through the many levels and collections of clothing.
After a few minutes (only about two or so), I threw my hands up in the air and shouted that I had given up. At that moment, the TARDIS arranged a pile of lovely clothes. There was a dark apple-green T-shirt that had 'Don't Challenge The Female, She's Always In The Kitchen.' printed on it in giant silver letters, a lighter apple-green pair of skinny jeans with silver rhinestones placed at random upon it, a lovely neon-green ribbon to hold my hair out of my face, and a pair of the most beautiful high heels I had ever seen. They were apple-green, like the rest of my outfit, and had silver straps to wrap around my ankles in order to hold them in place. I thanked her enthusiastically as I stripped off my grimy red clothing.
"Can you wash the clothing?" I asked her, pointing to the pile of dirty, red clothing on the floor. "Oh, and can we keep the high heels? I rather like them."
The TARDIS gave an affirming hum, and I smiled. With that sorted, I pulled the T-shirt on, which made my hair full of static. I groaned but ignored it for the moment and finished getting dressed. Then I braided my hair and used the ribbon to keep it held in place. I slipped the high heels on, and sighed as I felt the cool faux-leather envelop my feet.
"Where's the Doctor?" I asked the TARDIS once I was all finished preening.
I couldn't help but giggle when she showed me the location of the Doctor; he was riding a huge wave of pool water like a drowned cat. I began to walk towards him when I realized I didn't need to. He was heading my way.
A huge wave of water, carrying the Doctor on its crest just like how the TARDIS had showed me, came rushing towards me and the wardrobe. I ran towards the door, and the TARDIS, realizing my intentions, diverted the flow of the water into the library, much to my displeasure.
"I wanted you to divert it into his bedroom, not the library." I rolled my eyes as I groaned and facepalmed. "Now all of the books are absolutely soaked," I whined, continuing to express my displeasure with her actions.
She only gave an amused hum, which caused me to throw my hands up in the air in exasperation. I began to walk to the library, only to pop my head back into the room. "Make sure to dry the clothes after you wash them, please. Also, please dry the books once you're done."
She gave me a reassuring hum and I continued on my earlier path. I walked down the hallway, following the slick trail of water and the overwhelming scent of chlorine the pool water had left behind. I pushed the mahogany double doors open, and found all of the water inside a swimming pool the TARDIS had carefully constructed in order to contain it. The Doctor was lying sprawled out on the floor, still dripping wet. Surrounding him were various pages of various books, which made my frown deepen.
I walked up to him, my heels clicking against the floor gently. I watched with amusement as he stared at my high heels with a dazed expression, as if he was unable to register what was happening. Eventually, his gaze lifted to my face, and when his eyes lifted to my face, he had the expression of a deer in the headlights of a car. He began to stammer apologies, which made me roll my eyes. I hauled him to his feet and dragged him to a place where we could see the main control room and the doors.
"W-What are you doing, Iridis?" he stuttered, still fearful I was upset with him because the pool water had gotten the books wet, as I yanked one of my high heels off my foot.
I ignored him as I undid the ribbon that held my hair back in the braid, and my auburn curls falling down from their prison and spilling over my shoulders. I tied one end of the ribbon on to the strap of my high heel, then looked up at the doors. "Doors open!" I called, and they swung open, swinging outwards.
"How did you do that?" The Doctor gaped at me, and I gently lifted his jaw so his mouth wasn't hanging open.
"Don't do that, sweetie," I said without looking at him, patting his cheek. "It makes you look like even more of an idiot."
The Doctor cried out as he took offense to my statement, but I tuned out his childish, insulted rant. I swung my makeshift grappling hook around until I had the right velocity, and then I flung it up and out of the TARDIS. I felt my high heel catch on something and tugged on the ribbon to make sure it was secure.
After assuring myself it was secure, I began to climb up and out of the TARDIS. I swung my legs over the edge once I had reached the top and jumped down on to the soil below. I waited until the Doctor appeared as well to grab my high heel and slip it on. I examined the ribbon and tossed it back in; it was torn and wouldn't look good with my hair. Moments later, a new ribbon, this one sky blue, gently blew into my outstretched hands.
I quickly pulled my hair up into a ponytail and tied it back with the ribbon, then I turned to the little girl the Doctor was already talking to.
"Could I have an apple? All I can think about. Apples. I love apples. Maybe I'm having a craving? That's new. Never had cravings before," the Doctor said energetically. Then he looked over the edge and back into the TARDIS, whistling. "Whoa. Look at that."
"Are you okay?" the young Scottish girl asked, looking at the both of us weirdly.
"Just had a fall. All the way down there, right to the library. Hell of a climb back up," the Doctor replied as I yanked him down from the edge of the TARDIS.
"You're forgetting you wouldn't be up here if it wasn't for me," I reminded him threateningly, jabbing my forefinger in his face.
He gulped audibly and backed away from me a bit.
"You're soaking wet," the young girl continued as I admired her bright red hair.
"I like your hair," I said, speaking before the Doctor could.
"Thanks." The girl ducked her head, her cheeks bright pink.
I nodded, and the Doctor gave me an irritated look that melted into a fearful one as I returned his glare.
"Ahem, uh, I was in the swimming pool," the Doctor said awkwardly, still scared I was going to hurt him.
"You said you were in the library," the young girl said, frowning.
"So was the swimming pool, unfortunately," I said quickly, stealing the Doctor's line.
"Are you two policemen?" the little girl with the beautiful red hair asked, voicing the question that had been hovering on the tip of her tongue.
"Why? Did you call a policeman?" the Doctor asked quickly, giving me a worried look, which I returned.
"Did you come about the crack in my wall?" the sweet little girl continued as if he hadn't spoken.
"What crack? Argh!" The Doctor stumbled, only to have me catch him and slowly lower him down to the ground.
"Are you all right, mister?" The young girl wore a worried look, which made the corners up my mouth twitch upwards a bit.
"No, I'm fine. It's okay. This is all perfectly norm –" He coughed and regeneration energy floated out in a golden trail that soon disappeared.
I began to rub his back soothingly. I knew it hurt when one regenerated.
"I don't know yet. I'm still cooking," the Doctor mused, watching as his hands glowed faintly with regeneration energy, only to look up at the young girl. "Does it scare you?"
The little girl shook her head, her voice thick with a Scottish accent I couldn't help but love. "No, it just looks a bit weird."
I chuckled a bit until the Doctor elbowed me in the side. I glared at him.
"No, no, no. The crack in your wall. Does it scare you?" the Doctor clarified as I climbed to my feet.
"Yes," confirmed the young girl, causing me to give a low and long whistle.
That had to be one hell of a scary crack.
"Well then, no time to lose," the Doctor cried excitedly, leaping to his feet and looking down at the little girl. "I'm the Doctor. Do everything I tell you, don't ask stupid questions, and don't wander off."
With that, he turned on his heel and walked straight into a tree. He fell to the ground and I rolled my eyes in amusement. "Wrong way, sweetie."
The little girl wasn't nearly as amused. "Are you all right?"
"Early days. Steering's a bit off," the Doctor said dazedly as I hauled him to his feet again.
"Mind if we go into your house, sweetheart?" I asked sweetly, bending down to the young girl as the Doctor fell over without my support.
She shook her head, and I smiled. I turned around and dragged the Doctor to his feet, wrapping his arm around my shoulder as I wrapped mine around his. I motioned for her to lead the way, and she did.
Once inside, the young girl handed the Doctor an apple. "If you're a doctor, why does your box say Police?"
"It's just a hobby," I whispered to the little girl.
The Doctor bit into the apple and immediately spat it back out. "That's disgusting. What is that?" he asked, wiping his mouth off on his once-nice button-up shirt.
"That's an apple, sweetie," I said slowly and carefully, acting like he couldn't understand English.
"Apple's rubbish. I hate apples," the Doctor said, grimacing.
"You said you loved them," the little girl said, absolutely confused beyond belief.
"Early days," I whispered to her softly. "He doesn't know what he likes and what he doesn't."
"No, no, no. I like yoghurt. Yoghurt's my favorite. Give me yogurt," he ordered, continuing to rant without realizing we had been having our own conversation.
I smiled. "Go ahead and get him some. But first, what's your name?"
"Amelia," she replied, "Amelia Pond."
"That's a lovely name, Amelia," I complimented her in a hushed tone. "My name is Iridis."
"Thank you, Iridis," Amelia said, bowing her head a little bit.
With that, she rushed off to get the Doctor his yogurt. Meanwhile, I went and whacked the Doctor upside the head.
"Ouch!" he cried in an injured tone, reaching back to cradle his head. "What was that for?"
"Manners," I hissed before sliding into the chair next to him.
He pouted childishly until Amelia brought the bowl of yogurt over. She handed it to him and he shoveled some in his mouth, only to spit it back out.
"I hate yogurt. It's just stuff with bits in," the Doctor muttered as if it were the worst thing in the whole universe.
"You said it was your favorite," she said, frowning.
"New mouth. New rules. It's like eating after cleaning your teeth. Everything tastes wrong. Argh!" The Doctor began to twitch violently and I pulled him back into his seat and smoothed his hair back.
"What is it? What's wrong with you?" Amelia asked wildly.
The Doctor frowned at her word choice. "Wrong with me? It's not my fault. Why can't you give me any decent food? You're Scottish. Fry something."
Amelia scurried over to grab a frying pan and follow his instructions and my frown deepened. I whacked him upside the head even harder.
"Owie," he whined, rubbing the back of his head.
"Work on your manners and I won't hit you as much," I hissed in his face before walking over to help Amelia fry some bacon.
That got spat out and rejected, as well as beans and bread and butter. He didn't like bread and butter so much he threw it out the door and hit a cat, which caused me to hit him again. He then raced over to the fridge and began to rummage through it. Then he pulled out fish fingers and custard, and I made a face.
Once it was made, he dipped the fish fingers in the custard. I gave him a disgusted look.
"You've liked some pretty weird things in your past regenerations, but this tops it all off by a mile," I said, grimacing as he took another bite and chewed it slowly, just to disgust me.
Yeah, I whacked him upside the head for that one.
Amelia was eating some ice cream and offered me some. I declined, though. I asked her if I could grab something, and she shrugged. I walked over to the freezer and dug out some chocolate and jalapenos. I ignored the Doctor and Amelia's weird looks as I melted the chocolate, then dipped the jalapenos in it. I sat back down and began munching on my chocolate covered jalapenos.
"Funny," Amelia mused, licking her ice cream with a ferocity that amused me greatly.
"Am I? Good. Funny's good. What's your name?" the Doctor asked her, still munching contently on his fish fingers and custard.
"Amelia Pond," she replied, shaking her head as I offered her a jalapeno.
"Oh, that's a brilliant name. Amelia Pond. Like a name in a fairy tale. Are we in Scotland, Amelia?" the Doctor asked, nodding eagerly as I offered him a jalapeno.
He bit into it, and, to my great surprise, he didn't spit it out. Instead, he munched on it contently. He offered me a fish finger dipped in custard, causing me to grimace. He continued to offer it, though, and eventually I gave in and took it, recognizing he wouldn't leave me alone until I did.
"No. We had to move to England. It's rubbish," Amelia replied bitterly, attacking her ice cream as I bit into the fish finger dipped in custard the Doctor had given me; it wasn't disgusting, which surprised me.
"Well, England can be a lovely place," I said comfortingly, touching her shoulder lightly. "Just you wait and see."
She gave me a hesitant smile.
"So what about your mum and dad, then? Are they upstairs? Thought we'd have woken them by now," the Doctor mused, looking up at the ceiling thoughtfully.
I looked up at the ceiling, too; I'd been wondering that very same thing.
"I don't have a mum and dad. Just an aunt," Amelia said, sounding almost bitter.
"I don't even have an aunt," the Doctor said like he was all that; I was so tempted to whack him again, but I restrained myself.
"You're lucky." She gave him a jealous look that made me smile.
"I know," he said proudly with a huge, idiotic grin. "So, your aunt, where is she?"
Her frown deepened. "She's out," she muttered.
"And she left you all alone?" he asked, his grin turning into a frown.
"I'm not scared," Amelia said, quick to assure us she was brave.
"'Course, you're not. You're not scared of anything. Box falls out of the sky, man and woman falls out of a box, man eats fish custard and woman eats chocolate covered jalapenos, and look at you, just sitting there. So you know what I think?" he asked, his grin returning in an instant.
"What?" Amelia asked, curious.
"Must be a hell of a scary crack in your wall," the Doctor said before he bit into another fish finger coated with custard as if all of it was perfectly normal.
I facepalmed.