Hello my fellow fanfiction writer , my name is mysticwriter10
This story is all about Rowan Blanchard (which is one of my favorite actress ). This is all Rowan POV . This is all made up. Nothing of this is true. Only some of the facts from her twitter and what we all know from her is true . The rest are all fiction. Anywho this story is told using lyrics by one of my favorite artist "Marina And The Diamonds". I'm going to use one of her earliest albums called "The Family Jewels". Hope you guys enjoy.
" Welcome to the family jewels , Coal to diamonds, sold to fools , Welcome to the family jewels
Simmer and suffer, can't keep my cool , I can't keep my cool, I can't keep my cool "
Welcome my name is Rowan and this is my tragedy , beautiful , and exciting life ….interesting right?
Let's just start at the beginning , but first let me ask you a question "Are you satisfied with your life?"
(Flashback 2 years earlier)
" I was pulling out my hair the day I got the deal , Chemically calm , Was I meant to feel happy
That my life was just about to change?"
OMG I was cast as 'Riley" on a new show . This is my big break . This is my moment . Things are about to change for the better ...right?
Present
" People like to tell you what you're gonna be , It's not my problem if you don't see what I see
And I do not give a damn if you don't believe , My problem, it's my problem ,That I never am happy , It's my problem, it's my problem , On how fast I will succeed"
Oh how I regret taking this job . I hate how I was the "it" girl and everyone is expecting me to be like my character "Riley" . I mean come on . Do you really think any actress or actors are 'exactly " like their character ? No .This is show business and whatever say goes. So what if I don't want to smile. I will smile when I'm happy , but I'm not , so I will not smile. At least I'm showing my true self instead of posing "Selfies" with an fake grin that every celebrity does. Why can't I show my true self instead of being fake?
'Are you satisfied with an average life? , Do I need to lie to make my way in life?"
I wonder if I was a normal 14 year old , going to school everyday, without the fame will I have an average life? Will I be satisfied ? Are you satisfied? maybe I should just pretend to have a normal life , maybe that will make it easier.
"Cause it's my problem , If I wanna pack up and run away , It's my business if I feel the need to , Smoke and drink and sway , It's my problem, it's my problem , If I feel the need to hide
And it's my problem if I have no friends , And feel I want to die"
So what If I identified myself as "Queer". I am me. Okay maybe I shouldn't have used the word "Queer" , but hey I'm just trying to change the meaning of that word. Everyone associates the word Queer with "Gay". I AM NOT GAY! well not that I know of . I might be Bi? Who knows I'm still a teenager. I probably will find out my real sexaulaity when I'm a little older. Anyway is my sexuality . I can be and do whatever I want. Can't you really blame me for not identifying my sexauilty yet? Just look at the past actress who "came out" or became "Bi" after their Disney days are over . Look at Demi , Miley , and don't forget Lindsey . Hey all I'm saying is anything can happen in my future.
"Sad inside , In this life , Unsatisfied praying , Sad inside , In this life , Unsatisfied waiting"
I hate having depression . It kills me inside. I feel unwanted , unhappy and worse not loved. I know a lot of people like my family and friends loves me and cares about me , but then why do I feel so depressed?
"Black, white , (Are you satisfied, are you satisfied?) , Black, white , (Are you satisfied, are you satisfied?) , Black, white ,(Are you satisfied, are you satisfied?) , Black, white ,(Are you satisfied, are you satisfied?)"
My life is literally black and white .
White : I have my awesome amazing family , friends , and my cast/crew who loves and supports me no matter what.
Black: Me and demons inside my body.
Let me ask you the question again , "Are you satisfied with your life?"
because I'm not.