A Dying wish

by Mrs X Y and Z

A young man stands on the edge of the Astronomy Tower contemplating his life. Everyone else though he had everything; a spoiled childhood, most popular person in his house, girls fawning over him. And yet the truth couldn't be more different than that, all anyone needed to do was take a second look.

Staring out into the darkness I feel death's presence more than ever, wishing I could of just had a bit of space to breathe during my life. And yet I know that wishing is pointless, isn't it what I've been doing for all my life. Wishing for a loving father, a mother that's not afraid to show their love, the girl to realise how I feel about her. And yet, here I still stand; on the edge of blackness.

People say death scares them but not me. I was on the losing side of the war and yet here I stand. If only Potter hadn't tried to save me from Azkaban. Then my mind might have been taken and I wouldn't have to live like this. I'm just a shell of the proud boy who tried to impress his father. And yet here I stand on the edge of darkness, a broken shell.

I'd say a bit of doubt filled my mind when I looked down at the letter in my hand but I'd be lying. My only wish is to be able to be myself. A mirthless laugh echoes around the cold tower as I look out into the darkness, knowing somewhere in the depths of my mind that it came from my mouth. I've never been allowed to be myself, there has always been watching eyes. Eyes that bring pain with them when I slip up. At home they belonged to my family, at school they belong to my housemates. So I stare out into the darkness one last time; a cold laugh still echoing in my mind.

Bringing the letter up to my face I watch as it burns, slowly at first until I have no choice but to drop it to save my hand from being burnt. Not that it would have made much difference. The letter burns at my feet, its contents known only to myself. The apology to my mother, the hate directed at my father, the love focused solely on the girl. I take a step into the darkness; leaving the tiny bit of light from the still burning letter.

The air whistles through my hair, my robes billowing like my godfather's. Even as the eternal darkness comes ever closer I don't try to reach for my wand, it's too late for me. My spirit was broken long ago, leaving just the body in need of disposing. That's why the ground is coming into focus now, I'm doing the final job of life. Because there's nothing left for me here.

Just before the ground makes contact with me I make one final wish. To let me go somewhere where I am loved for who I am.