Where we belong
Thriving Ivory
Hold on we're gonna make it if it takes all night
Hearts racing like a rocket at the speed of light
Don't fight it we've been running for far too long
We're going back where we belong
You heave another mouth full of scarlet blood. Kate turns away. She can't bear watching her friend slowly die. You lay back down and Nurse Emma cleans up the little tear of blood trickling down from the corner of your mouth.
You stare at Kate. She smiles slightly and holds your fragile hand.
You are scared.
No, you are terrified.
But you can't let her know this. It isn't hard to tell the suffering you are putting her through. You can see it in Kate's eyes.
"Kate," you stammer through a loss of oxygen. "Go. It's okay." Kate shakes her head vigorously and kneels by your bed, squeezing your hand between both of hers.
"Never," she whispers. You try to grin the way you always do. The grin that all the girls sigh over. Even Kate despite what she tells others. When she sees it, instead of the reassurance you tried to send her, it brings even more pain for her and a wave of tears flee from Kate's eyes. She is never going to see that smile again.
You glance at Nurse Emma, asking her without words if you and Kate could have some privavcy. She smiles kindly and leaves you in the last piece of company you two will have together.
"You can't leave me," Kate sobs, collapsing into the bed sheets. You hate to see your friend that way. It causes your weak heart much more pain than that horrid plague could. It also reminds you of a movie you once saw. How typical.
So hold on we've got our wings and we're chasing the wind
Farewell to all the places we have been
And if it takes us all night long
We're going back where we belong
There are no words you can think of telling the crying woman. You know you should probably tell her how you always feel in her presence, but you think better of it. It would hurt her more. So instead you run your fingers through Kate's deep chocolate hair, trying to suppress the winces of pain through your arm and fingers.
Kate gazes up at you withering eyes, blinking back the tears. You just stare into hers. Even if you had the air you are lacking, there is nothing you could say. She hugs what she can of you. It fills you with love.
"Tony," Kate calls your name. It makes the small dying hairs on the back of your neck stand. You wonder how a girl like her could have such an affect on you. It makes things that much harder.
"We still have things to do," she says as though that might change whats happening. Then she smiles a little, "bad guys to catch."
It sends a smile on your blue cracked lips.
"You haven't told me about all the movies and characters playing them," she adds. More tears. "You haven't –"
"- told you all the reasons why I drown myself in other girls," you continue for her. Kate doesn't interrupt you as she's savouring each and every word you say. " I haven't taken you out to a proper dinner. Just you and me. I haven't explained all the reasons why I would choose you over any one else any day. I haven't brought you home to meet my father –not that I exactly want to. He's not great enough to meet someone as great as you-."
Kate's bottom lip is quivering excessively. You know you should stop. You know a lot of things. But you also know you can't go down quietly nor peacefully without her knowing. So you take a huge breath, feeling another mass of blood wanting to be vomited out. But you stifle it back.
You take Kate's beautiful –yet pallid- left hand and rub your thumb on her ring finger. You are gazing down at it and she follows.
"I haven't slid a golden ring on your finger," you whisper.
You can feel an out of place tear running down your bloodless cheek. You don't look up into Kate's crying eyes because you know they will only break the walls you've built around your heart. Kate silently sobs and you can hear them. It hurts so much that your body is shaking slightly to hold back the sobs you want to free.
See I have to believe that there's more than it seems
More than a soul in a boat in a sea of sinking dreams
And I have to be sure that there's gonna be a cure
'Cause somewhere down the line I lost part of me that's pure.
You grab the bucket Nurse Emma has left by your bed and splutter out blood. You have to believe that there is a cure as you have so many things that you want to do with the weeping soul beside you. You want to live for her. But Gibbs has already called. He's already ruled out that possibility.
But that doesn't stop you. Your secretly a man of faith and know God must be watching.
More blood runs from your starving veins and into the large bucket. You can't feel most of whats below your waist. You just pray that enough hope may bring it back.
A hand passes your face to grab a tissue. It's Kate's. You think it's to soak up the tears on her own face but like half the time; you are wrong. She smiles through the pain she's enduring when she pats your eyes and cheeks of your own tears. You encircle your fingers around her wrist and stop her mid way.
Kate awaits for you to say something. But you don't have anything.
Your fingers crawl up her wrist and into her hand. It takes all your strength but soon Kate's crying with a partial happiness as your hands and fingers are entwined with one another's. Your crying too. It just makes this moment more special. Your last moment.
But don't let go, no its not too late you know
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Gallagher Girl1