Title : Come back one day
Rating: K
Pairing: RichterXEmil
Summary: After returning, Emil had kept writing letters to Richter, and keep them in a box with memories of him. This is one of these letters. Richter X Emil
Author's note: My very first attempt at an angsty/sad kind of story, the idea has been stuck in my head for months and I decided to give it a try. Guess that's that happens after a while. Now about this letter. I consider this one of Emil's breakdown letters, that he wrote as much happy news as he could in the past and now simply can't find the energy to pretend. Some parts may seem off, some may seem random. It was hard putting up a summary for this.
Dear Richter I know I should stop writing these letters to you, I really should. It's not healthy to keep clinging to you like this. Everybody else says so too. They've never found any of my letters but they can tell. They always could. Especially Marta, she can read me like no one else does. That's what I used to like about her and everyone else too, but now I can't stand it. And Marta has gotten worse with her clinging, I think it's because she's worried. We've been getting into arguments more and more often. Yesterday I told her to leave me alone, she told me to grow up and become a man. It really hurts…because she's right. I do need to grow up. I'm almost 18 now, and have things barely changed. Not in a good way at least. I've told you before right? About how it didn't work out with my aunt and uncle. Even though I'm living in Altamira with some of the others now, things still feel uneasy. I keep spending most of my time on the balcony, with the door locked. It's so contradicting. I used to be lonely, yet I locked myself up in my room out of fear of being yelled at. Now that I've got friends who care about me, I still lock myself up to avoid their concern. Something I would have given so much for in the past. I loved how there were people that cared for me, now I just want them to leave me alone. It annoys me, it saddens me and it angers me. It's all too confusing, that's why I'm writing another letter. Writing these letters help me get rid of all the frustration. At least for a while. ...There's one thing that angers me the most. They say I need to stop loving you...How can they say that? No one is allowed to forbid something like that! And it's not like I can really help it. I can't just snap my fingers and don't love you anymore, to stop loving someone means to forget about them, and thus forget about the feeling you get when near them. I can't forget about you Richter. I don't want to forget about you. I don't want to forget about your face, your hair, your eyes, the way you looked at me, the way you spoke to me, the few touches we exchanged and how they felt, not even the sound of our clashing blades . So it hurts to notice how I do forget some of these things. Not enough to forget about you, not nearly. But it still hurts. I feel so guilty, so sorry. One of the few times I'm not going to apologize for being sorry... ...Remember when you once asked me why I was sewing an extra pocket to my bag? That time at the Balacruf? I told you it was for the key to a box, after which you told me not to be so easy trusting with you. In that box I keep my memories of you. A piece of your clothes, cut off by my sword during our final battle, an old pair of your gloves you gave to me when searching for that beetle and I was cold. And these letters. I know I must sound like a wimp now, but the reason I'm bringing this up is because I'm wondering… Why do my letters keep First I thought it might have been Marta or any of the others, but they say they didn't and they are always honest with me. But I realise you are the only one who knows where I keep them. And that they are disappearing…well it makes me happy. It would mean you read them right? So you're not completely isolated then. Or maybe Tenebrae brings them, he might know about the box and key too, considering he barely left me alone. I just hope I'm right. Who knows, maybe you'll be able to come and talk to me one day? It might just be false hope, but believing you'll be able to is better than denying it and get that painful ache in my heart. So I hope, I hope it so bad, that you're reading my letters. And that one day, you'll come back and that I'll be able to see you again. That I'll be able to talk to you again. That I'll be able to smell your scent again. That I'll be able to touch you again. And that you will touch me. How much I wish for that to happen.
I miss you so much, I can't tell you often enough. So please Richter, if you really are reading this. Come back. I may not be in the position to ask this, but please. Come back. Back to this world, back to the human world. Back to me.
...Please come back.
Hours later, Emil was fast asleep, the letter still on the desk the box next to it, open. Richter's gloves clutched in his hands and to his chest Emil was unaware of the small light appearing in the room, neither did he notice the person emerging from it.
Feet moved, carrying the person to the desk. Hands moved over the letter, tracing the handwriting, progressing each written word. Fingers traced the spots where water had rippled the paper as a sigh emerged from the person.
The sounds of moving feet were heard once again as the person moved to the bed, sitting on the edge. A hand was lifted and stroked Emil's hair out of his face as the boy's eyes fluttered open. His eyes widened as he took in the form of the person sitting on his bed.
''...Richter?'' his hoarse voice asked sitting up and not daring to blink. The hand remained on his face.
''...Hey Emil...''
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A/N
Okay I know the world there would probably die if Richter would leave. I just couldn't bring myself to leave it with just the letter. I hope I did an okay job.
You can imagine any ending with this. The extra part is just for those who can't go without a happy ending (so including myself). I hope you all liked this, despite the fact that there is a (kind of) happy ending while I labelled this as angsty.
Also, as I told before, I'm going to start a ''from A to Z'' story. And I want you to pick the first word, these are the possibilities: Addicted, Attached, Accordance, Adrenaline. Of course if you know something better that's okay too;;