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A/N - Originally written for Tricky Raven's Week 8 Endless Summer drabble prompt of a picture of a couple curled up in a blanket before a bonfire. I started writing and kept going...and going...and going lol. Needless to say it is not a drabble but a one shot. Hope you enjoy!
This is what it's really all about I couldn't help but think. Sitting by a fire with my love and feeling content. So much drama over the past several years and now I am complete. I have my soul mate, I have a rambunctious "pack" of friends (literally!), and a happy secret I can't wait to share. Jared and I were sitting wrapped in a blanket in the cool of the evening at our usual bonfire spot waiting on the rest of our friends to arrive. Jared whispers to me "What are you thinking about?" I hesitate for a minute because I know my thoughts might hurt him a bit. But who knew fate would work out the way it did?
After the Newborn battle, I told Edward good-bye. Seeing the pack fighting for me gave me a new perspective on life. Jacob had been right. I needed to LIVE. Not just forever. I wanted that little boy and little girl I saw when I kissed him. I want to rock on the front porch while they run around with their friends. I couldn't have that with Edward. So the Cullen's left again. I was sad, but I did get to keep in touch with Alice and Emmet this time.
After Jacob healed, we celebrated at Sam and Emily's. Jacob had been constantly at me commit to him. I did love him, but the fear of imprinting haunted me. And it turned out to be a viable fear. I could barely handle life after Edward left me, how was I supposed to live if my "personal sun" left me in the dark? I wouldn't.
Jacob did imprint, that night in fact. On Kim. Jared's imprint. We had no idea how it happened or why. But one look at her and Jacob was done. I wouldn't have even noticed if I hadn't heard Jared start yelling. He sounded heartbroken, devastated. A sound and feeling I was personally very well acquainted with. Next thing we knew, he had phased and taken off into the woods. Jacob just stood there staring at Kim while she stared right back at him. Old Quil started cursing like I had never heard him curse before. He explained about the Alpha's True Mate. While Kim may have been a quiet, shy, and almost plain girl, she balanced out the Alpha so he would be able to lead the way he was supposed to. The only way Jacob would be able to see his imprint was when he ready to assume Alpha. And it appeared that time had come. We couldn't figure out why the gods had changed their minds, but neither Jacob nor Kim was arguing with it. They wandered off together after Sam and Paul went after Jared. I always felt it was a bit suspicious that she took it so well, but that's not my business I suppose.
Jared however took great exception to it. He stayed phased for 3 days. All the guys except Jacob tried to talk with him but he would have none of it. On the fourth day they let him be. I was down at First Beach that day, trying to figure out what I was going to do next. I had barely spoken with Jake, but I expected that. He was too busy getting to "know" his new imprint. I knew that was pack talk for having sex but I honestly did want/need the details. That's when I saw him. Jared was sitting on a log with his back to the forest just staring across the water. I watched him a little bit before he spoke to me "I know you're standing there Bella. You can't really hide around a wolf you know?" I had to giggle at him. "Yeah," I said. "But I wasn't really trying to hide. I was trying to figure out how to word my thoughts."
He shook his head gently at that. "There's nothing you can really say to me Bella. My friend, my BROTHER stole my MATE!" He was shouting at this point. He stood and began pacing. "I just can't figure it out! Why?! Was I not good enough?! Was I was just a tool to get her around the right people?! What was the point of our love?! And WHY DO I STILL LOVE HER!" I felt the tears dripping off my cheeks before I even realized they were there. Jared dropped to his knees and buried his head in his hand. The pain was rolling off of him in crippling waves. I cautiously approached him, well of aware of the fact his pain could cause him to phase unexpectedly. But something was telling me it was ok; I would be able to help him. I kneeled in front of him, close but not within arm's reach.
We stayed like that a few moments before he spoke quietly through his sobs. "Sam and Paul tried to explain it to me. I heard what Old Quil said. But is it supposed to make me feel better? That was what Seth, Quil, and Embry were trying to do. Trying to joke about it. I knew their loyalty to Jacob was stronger than their loyalty to me so they wouldn't say anything against him. And I hold nothing against him, but I am glad I haven't seen or heard him because I would probably rip him apart right now. Surprisingly Leah was the best to be around. She was just there. Didn't try to convince me to come back, didn't tell me I was an idiot. She just let me be and watched me."
"I want to hate her Bella. I want to hate Jake. But deep down I know I can't. And I should have known. But I was blinded by love, by the "imprint." Do you know that my name was not the only one she was doodling in her notebooks? I found one a couple of months ago. 'Kimberly Black'. 'Mr. and Mrs. Jacob E. Black'. 'Kimmie Black'. I didn't think anything of it at that time but now… Now I see it. I keep remembering little looks she snuck at him. I remember hearing his thoughts about her. I know they didn't do anything but I also know he thought about her an inordinate amount of time. I put it up to a pack mate caring about an imprint. We all felt that way towards Emily so why not?" He shook his head and sighed.
"Jared, I know the pain you are feeling. You may not believe me, I may still be the 'leech-lover' to you, but I have had my heart torn out for no real reason. I have felt hopeless, hit rock bottom. But the wonderful thing about rock bottom is that the only way to go is up. And we will all be here to support you when you are ready to start climbing." I wanted him to look up at me and give me some sort of acknowledgment. Instead he turned and leaned his back against the log he had previously sat on. I turned with him and we spent time just staring out across the ocean.
The sunset was beautiful and even though it was July, the wind off the ocean was chilly. I shivered slightly and that drew Jared's attention. He finally looked at me and asked if I was cold. I turned to answer him and felt my world stop. The look in his eyes now was one that I had seen recently and not directed towards me. It was the same look Jake had when he looked at Kim. "Oh you have got to be…" he whispered. My brain started traveling at 100 miles an hour.
"Did….Did you just…" I said shakily. All he could do was nod his head. "Ok," I breathed. "Ok, we can work this out. Um… you'll be anything I want or need you to be right?" Again he just nodded his head. "Ok, so how about we are friends. Friends is good yeah?" He didn't nod or shake his head. He just kept staring at me. Our bodies shifted slightly towards each, seemingly of their own volition. His eyes drooped closed as he kept coming towards me. I knew what was coming and while I was scared, I was also excited. I wanted this. I wanted to be loved, to feel like I mattered to someone. Sure I had mattered to Edward, but as a novelty, his "own personal brand of heroin." Jake loved me but as what he felt he could mold me into. To be loved for just being me? That would be true happiness.
I felt his lips graze mine, just a whisper of skin and breath. Heaven. He opened his eyes, giving me a questioning look. I nodded slightly and that was all it took. He was on me like fire. His lips melded to mine all hot and not too wet. His hands found purchase in my hair and on my waist while mine grasped at his bare chest and shoulders. I was up in flames in a matter of seconds. Never have I felt like this. It was insane. I felt like I was coming home, that all was right in the world finally. It only lasted a few seconds, but I have never felt more complete. His breath washed across my face gently as I opened my eyes to look at him. "So, more than friends then?" I asked him. He chuckled gently. "I would have to say so Bella."
Peace finally settled over him as we walked hand in hand over to Sam and Emily's. It was nice just being us. Fortunately (or maybe unfortunately) the entire pack was gathered. The imprints were there as well. All the guys looked at Jared and upon seeing his small smile and our entwined hands, they visibly relaxed. Jacob however did not. His face reddened in anger. Jared just stared at him, eyes dark and dangerous. Jake took a deep breath and looked to his side at Kim and stopped. "Look, Jared none of this happened the way we wanted it to. I truly am sorry you got hurt, but I am not sorry I imprinted on Kim. She truly has helped me. Bella, I never wanted to hurt you and that seems to be all I can do." Jake sighed heavily before he continued. "I wish you guys happiness. Treat each other well."
It took some time for all of us to get used to being around each other, but time does truly heal all wounds. Jared and I got to know each other. While Jacob and Kim might've jumped right in the sack, I knew I was not ready for that. We took our time mentally and physically. Next thing we know its Sam and Emily's wedding. Of course we were all included in it. Emily and I had become really close over the past months. I know Kim and I will never be friends, but I find I'm ok with that. Jake never comes around anymore and I occasionally feel the loss. But then I look at Jared and realize I am much better off.
At the reception, Jared and I were enjoying a slow dance. Yes, he got me on the dance floor, but it was a slow song so I wasn't doing too badly. I just couldn't keep my eyes off him. He leaned down to ear and whispered "Marry me." A statement, not a question. He knew my answer. There was no question about it. That night was the first time we made love. It was everything I expected and wanted: the initial sting, the adjustment, the rising and falling. Perfection. We kept the engagement quiet for several weeks to give every one time to get used to Sam and Emily's marriage. We planned to tell everyone at the bonfire tonight. Jared didn't know about my other surprise though. I can't wait to tell him about the life growing inside of me. Seems like once is really all it takes! The first pack baby. I couldn't help but smile every time I thought about it.
"Just remembering," I tell him. "Good stuff I hope?" he questioned raising his eyebrow. I couldn't help but laugh at him. "Always love. Always."