S. Theodora Markson did not want to be in that small room, in that decaying hotel, in that dying town in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by mysteries and crimes and the leftovers of a wrong celebratory party. She didn't want to be there, but when was the last time she had had anything that she wanted?
She bit her nails, getting rid of that stupid yellow nail polish. The color had not been what she wanted, either. But she had wanted to be with Sharon, to have that moment with her, to do that ridiculously girly thing and to forget for a moment all the terrible things lurking outside, in the small village, and farther in the big city.
She had never painted her nails with someone before. VFD did not approve of vanity. It was not forbidden, but it was not encouraged and in their teenage years, nor she nor her allies had any interest in such things.
It felt exciting to do it now, even if she could be considered a little too old for it. She thought she was sharing the moment with someone special. She was wrong, as always.
The pain on her face was barely noticeable. Theodora had suffered worse wounds before. It was nothing she couldn't deal with. What hurt most was her heart, and though it unfortunately wasn't the first time she was hurt there either, she still didn't learn how to deal with it.
'That's what you get for trusting a woman you just met.' She thought bitterly. She shouldn't have opened her heart for Sharon like she did, but how could she help it? In her line of work, you had to live for today, because you never knew what tomorrow would bring. And she desperate to forget someone else, a woman who must be somewhere in the city right now, standing on the ashes of some important building, with a smile Theodora used to love but now feared on her face.
Theodora's bravest allies were trying to stop the woman, but she was intelligent and had her own allies too. Theodora should have been there, aiding them. She knew the woman better than anyone else. But what could she do?
She was never very smart or very brave. Every successful mission she was a part of, was successful thanks to someone else. She was just there in case they needed an extra pair of hands. She was smart enough to know that.
She was also smart enough to know that the fighting that started in her organization would not be solved so easily. She was right. Thirteen years, and it seemed to only get worse. She felt it would soon lead to a war, something unlike anything they knew of. Many lives could be lost. She didn't even want to think of how this would affect the children that were to grow in such a mess.
The children.
Theodora was never particularly fond of children. She cared about them, from a distance, but she never felt she was fit to raise them.
She never wanted to take an apprentice. But with how things were, this was one of the safest jobs she could take. Take an apprentice, take them somewhere far to work in some safe and simple case. Keep out of trouble. Keep out of the way of the volunteers who were actually doing real work. Keep the child safe and away from the fight.
She liked to believe she did a good job with Bertrand. He may not have learned much from her, but he was safe for the time he was with her. He was a brilliant boy. She wished him the best. She wished him to keep away from the fight, to stay safe.
She had never wanted to take Snicket as an apprentice. His fame preceded him. Intelligent, perhaps even more than Theodora herself. Top of his class in many subjects at the academy. And also with a record track of time in detention. There was not a teacher that he had not argued with. He had a talent with words, and could turn the whole class to his side if given the chance. A troublemaker. A very smart one.
Theodora had met kids like him during her academy days. Most were long gone, and one in special was starting fires in the city. She often wondered where Snicket would be in 20, 30 years. Sometimes he made her feel hopeful, others he frightened her. He was dangerous, to himself and to those around him, but he still didn't realize it. She could tell him, but she knew he wouldn't listen. He would only realize the weight of his words and his actions the day he lost something important. And there was nothing that Theodora or anyone else could do about it.
She wondered how he ended up under her care. A student like him could be an apprentice to anyone. He could be anywhere, learning anything he wished to. There were volunteers that could deal with him much better than Theodora could, that could lead all the potential he had to a brilliant path.
She didn't even know where he was right now. His presence was very unpleasant most times. He was disrespectful and full of sarcasm. Theodora had soon noticed that there was nothing she could teach him. He thought he knew more than she did, since even before they first met. She preferred to leave him to his own business. It was better for both of them.
She hoped he was safe. He was a rude, arrogant young man. But he was a young man, not even 13 yet, in that age that everyone was rude and arrogant. He was her responsibility. She had begged Sharon for a deal, something to keep him safe even if only for a while. Theodora could only hope he wouldn't say the wrong thing to the wrong person and end up hurt. Or worse.