I do not own VA.

Rose's Pov

The gunshot rang in my ears. I could hear Christian sobbing a few seats away from me as Tasha crumpled onto the floor. Lissa sat beside me, a large tear rolling down her cheek. Dimitri was crying a bit too, something I had never ever seen before. I had brought this sadness and pain to these people. Me.

Of course, it was kind of a good thing that Lissa finally decided to shoot her and give her a quick death. Lissa had finished university a month back and Tasha had literally been wasting away in a cell. And, ironically, it was exactly the same cage I had been locked up in. I had been there for a week. Tasha had been there for a few years. Poor Tasha.

Tasha had had her hearing ages ago and Lissa could not bring herself to announce that she was going to die. So Lissa kept delaying it until I told her that the punishment of death was a hundred times worse when you were waiting for what seemed like years in a cage like an animal in the zoo. I told her that the death will be quick and not too painful.

I realised that I too was crying softly. I hate crying. Seriously. It's embarrassing since guardians are supposed to be all hard and serious and not wimpy. Especially the Queen's head guardian. But I was crying and I felt Dimitri put his arm around my waist, hugging me tightly.

"My fault. It's my fault she's dead, Dimitri," I whispered.

"It's alright. You did what's right. You were gonna die, unfairly and for a crime you didn't do," he replied with a very soft kiss on my forehead.

Everyone was leaving after some guy did some talking, blah blah blah. Lissa did not listen either; she was too busy staring at Tasha. I wondered what she was thinking.

It was a great thing that the bond was off since I didn't have to see Lissa's sex life anymore. I swear she must have slept with Christian at least twice a week now. They were totally in love right now.

Dimitri and I left. It was not my shift with Lissa and it was not Dimitri's shift with Christian, so we hanged around in my bedroom, chatting. It was the one I'd woken up in after I had been shot by Tasha. It was the one where I had my dramatic breakup with Adrian.

Adrian. Adrian sent letters to Lissa every week, asking if I was still with Dimitri. After the breakup with me, Adrian couldn't bear living in the same area as me when I was dating another guy. So he moved to California. He's quite lonely, Lissa said, and in his letters, he always hinted that if I was free of any guys I could move to California to live with him. I thought that was sweet, but I could never leave Dimitri.

Anyway, Lissa had been queen of the Moroi for a few years now and we were all thinking that we should do that weird queen pilgrimage thing soon, to get it over and done with. We had to go to Russia and Romania since those were where most of the royal families came from and it's a queenly tradition. Like, we had to do it one day. So for Dimitri and me, it was a fun holiday. For Lissa, it was a trip with a whole load of speeches.

Russia. The whole truth dawned upon me. That was why Dimitri was so excited. He could meet his family.

"Dimitri," I said uneasily, "er… by the way, when we go and visit your family, we are NOT going to St Petersburg, OK?"

"Definitely not," he agreed.

"And," I added with a gulp, "Your family have already done your funeral. It'll be like seeing the dead."

"Uh-oh," he said quietly. "That will be a problem."

"Now everything's gonna change," I said. He nodded.

The people of Russia believed that you were either alive or dead. There was no in between which is exactly what Strigoi are. So when you became Strigoi, they treated it as if you were dead, and did a funeral and whatever. And it was gonna be a lot more complicated now that people could be changed back from Strigoi, back to their alive selves, like Dimitri.

We trampled down the corridor. I went to Lissa's room while Dimitri went to Christian. Dimitri and Christian were getting really friendly with each other now. They were literally best buddies.

"Hey Liss," I said after entering. Everyone who was coming was packing hundreds of suitcases. Lissa had a briefcase full of speeches that she would do at each town. "We're not coming to St Petersburg with you. We're gonna visit the Belikovs."

"Wha- why?" she asked.

"Memories," I said simply. She nodded.

"Have you packed?" she asked.

"I've only got my rucksack, so yeah," I replied.

"Really?" she said.

"So… who's coming with us?" I asked.

"Uh… Dimitri, Christian, Jill, Eddie, some politicians and officials and some important people. Nathan Ivashkov. Lord Szelsky, that guy your mom guards. Other people. You know, like, a lot of people."

I nodded and hugged her tightly and left her with her packing. She had practically emptied her wardrobes to fill ten suitcases.

When Dimitri saw me in the corridor, we kissed for ages, before Dimitri said, "We're leaving tomorrow. We need to sleep."

I went into my room. With a sigh, I shoved my nazar into my smaller bag. There were some roses on my desk and a note.

Dear Rose,

I still love you. Every day without you is agony, and you seem to be blocking the dreams too. Why did you do this to me?

A.

PS. What's your number? Do you have BBM on your BlackBerry? Do you have Skype? What the hell is your email?

I sighed. I hadn't heard from Adrian for ages and I did want to keep touch with him. I scribbled stuff onto a loose piece of paper and put it into an envelope, writing his address. I would send the note to him tomorrow.

I sighed a third time as I turned off the light and went to bed.