Disclaimer: This fanfiction was not created with ill-willed intention towards anyone. This story was created for the sake of practicing my ability to critique. With that said, I kindly request for fans of the show to not take my criticism harsly and to respect my opinion on the matter. Any reviews that are among the lines of 'Screw you!' will be deleted, however constructive disagreement is welcomed.

(You can skip the AN if you want. But it does provide context. Other opening ANs will not be this long.)

Hey everyone! So, I'm really doing this huh? Making a story that criticizes one of the most popular shows currently on. That's right. I'm taking shots at the Roster Teeth series, RWBY. Here's how it's going to go. I'll be making a short parody of a problem that show makes and the end AN will be my explanation.

When I first said I hated this show back in my ending AN for Multiverse Fights, I'm sure that a lot of casual readers of my stories were confused. It's not that I'm the only person on the face of the Earth to not like the show, but RWBY goes into the category of the No. 1 cartoon that I hate that everyone else likes.

People who like things like the Nutshack probably just like it for the memes or 'so bad, it's funny to laugh at.' But when it comes to RWBY, most people's opinion on it ranges from it just being ok to being one of the greatest cartoons ever made. In addition, it has won numerous awards for Best Animated Series.

Really, this show? I mean sure it looks nice, but there was just so many storytelling errors. Constantly disregarding consistencies, so many characters that I just couldn't like, world building that the writers just made up as they went, aggravating romantic subplots, tedious scenes with no real comedy, and some of the worst cases of tell don't show that I have ever seen.

For those of you who care to know, I got into this show late. I watched it for the first time after watching Death Battle's Yang VS Tifa and I was intrigued by some of the things in Yang's analysis. Aura, Grimm, Dust, and the weapons just to name a few.

So yeah, I had expectations for this show. The first episode was ok, but hey, starting off something like this isn't going to have the best start. But by the halfway point of the first season, I was ready to quit. I heard the show got better, so I stuck around and got to the finial of the first season. Unfortunately, the finial left an incredibly bitter taste in my mouth.

But I thought it would be unfair to quit the show after only one season, so I continued. While Vol. 2 was better, I can't say that I really enjoyed it. But Vol. 3 was coming out and I thought that it would be an improvement over the first two seasons. Korra book three was an improvement over the first two seasons, so I saw the stars aligning.

Vol. 3, spoilers, is the only volume of the show that I can say that I don't regret seating through. Mostly because it introduced the best character on the show, Uncle Qrow.

Winter: He was drunk!

Glynda: He's always drunk!

They both turned to him drinking, causing him to look at them and shrug.

Seriously, Qrow is the best! The absolute best! If he weren't in the volume, I would have just left the show and never come back. Considering that a large chunk of the plot holes manifested in that volume.

Sadly, the following season was a serious downgrade. To the point that even fans of the show hated it and the season afterwards was hated even more.

From my understanding, the show is only half way finished. They have plans for five more seasons and are currently airing a spin off called RWBY Chibi that mocks the show. I'll get into why that's a problem in a later chapter.

Let's get to it. I decided to start with a problem that even fans of the show admit is a problem, the constant cliffhangers. Enjoy! (Quick heads up, the parodies are going to be relatively short.)

There were two guards wearing roughed clothing and were clubs. They were outside a camp in the middle of a forest with wooden walls and in front of a wooden gate. The guards saw a bush rustle and pointed their guns at it. A figure walked out. He was a blond man with blue eyes wearing brown pants and shirt. The guards pointed their guns at him and he smirked, "I don't suppose that you'll let me in?"

Everything was silent, as the blond man got into a martial arts stance.

-Atlas-

In a white room, a young boy with orange eyes and brown hair wearing a white shirt and brown pants, as well as holding a cane, was walking around a large table. Sitting at the table was a man wearing a white military and had a beard and a man with black hair and red eyes wearing a white shirt, black pants, and a red cape. The boy tapped his cane on the ground, "Qrow, Ironwood, we have an emergency on our hands. The forces of Salem are currently looking for the Winter and Summer Maiden."

Qrow stood up, "And to top it off, Raven is still nowhere to be found."

Ironwood rose his voice, "I'll send a squadron of soldiers to search for them."

The boy tapped his cane on the floor, "That is a terrible idea."

Ironwood placed his hand on his chin, "You're right. That would attract too much attention."

The boy tapped Ironwood on the chest with his cane, "No, because you are a general of an army in a cartoon. Therefore, you are automatically incompantant and people will question how you got your rank in the first place." (To be fair, this is a problem that a lot of shows and movies that have a military in them have.)

-Forest-

The blond man was now walking in the camp, looking at the thugs watching him. He stopped at a large red tent and saw a black haired woman with red eyes in a red dress. The woman looked at the blond man sternly, "Tai."

Tai looked at the woman with a similar sternness, "Raven. I'm here to talk."

Screen fades to black.

And that's that! I hope you enjoyed the parody and I want to apologise for it not being long. Most of the parodies are going to be short due to me not wanting the joke to go on for too long.

Now to get down to business and talk about why the cliffhangers fail.

To put it bluntly, most of the cliffhangers fail because of bad timing. The cliffhangers happen at times where there is no warranting, such as Cinder and her pose entering Raven's camp. Because the writers thought that people talking in a boring cabin was more important, they cut away from what could have been fun. Think about how cool it would have been to see Cinder intimidate that A-hole with her Maiden powers. That would have been fun to watch and wouldn't have really taken that much trouble to make.

The cliffhangers weren't really a large problem until Vol. 5, but Vol.4 had an instance where Qrow saved Ruby from Yuki Terumi with a scorpion tail and the episode ends. Then the next episode starts with Oscar and the actually conflict from the previous episode didn't happen until over halfway through. I am not joking.

Hell, most conflict starts and then goes to a cliffhanger. This was most relevant in Vol. 1. More specifically, the first half of Vol. 1 almost always ended there episodes with cliffhangers. When Weiss was attacked by Beowolves, cut to cliffhanger. Were the animators just falling behind, so they released the episodes halfway finished?

Before anyone brings up that the Volumes are meant to be viewed in one sitting like a movie, I have to ask a question. Why not make the Volumes into movies then? Samurai Jack season five was a continuous story, had even less episodes than a volume of RWBY, and you don't need to watch the whole season to get it, so what excuse does this show get? That they wanted to get money by selling DVDS? Yes, this web series has a DVD.

Once in a while they got it right. Like with the Vol. 2 ending. The episode before it ended on a good note to do such. The train crashing was a good time to do a cliffhanger, though it was obvious they were going to survive.

Admitibly, that's really all I got to say about the cliffhangers. Like I said, this issue is not really large and the only reason I'm talking about it is because I wanted to start with something that both fans and detractors agree is a problem.

The next chapter of this story is planned to be on the slapstick humor. Something else that the fans and detractors say is a problem. I want to get the easy issues out of the way early and talk about the more story and character issues near the end. As of now, I plan to make eight chapters of this story. That might change, but it's too early to say for certain.

If you want to ask me questions about this, smack it on your review or you can PM me and I'll try my best to answer.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy this story and, as I always say, constructive feedback is appreciated!