Eh, one-shots help me cope with stress. Is that weird? Instead of sleeping or doing something 'relaxing', I write my heart out with one-shots. I've written about three today, this one is about the only one I'm willing to share, the other two seem iffy and need some work. Maybe someday I'll post them up. Enjoy.
I'm unable to even breathe amongst the crowds of frozen people...
To say the relationship wasn't something he valued, was a lie, though he'd never admit it to anyone, sometimes he had a hard time admitting it to himself. She had left, years ago, never to return to him, he played it off as 'one less burden' but in reality he was pained. He had kept the whole situation to himself, knowing very well that people would talk if they knew, he was proud and that was something he could admit to.
She had left to find someone who understood, he didn't quite understand what that meant. Had he been a boring partner? Was he not enough for her? The questions came rushing the minute she told him was leaving him but he never got to voiced them.
Now, here he stood in the middle of a dance floor watching her every move. She had come back for a few months for Kaitlyn's wedding, or so John had blurted out while they were having their weekly guys-night-out. She was smiling, her smile was so much more different this time. She looked truly happy as a comparison to when they were together. He brought his water up to his lips, because drinking alcohol was something he'd never do, something that was completely disgusting. He knew, alcohol was nothing but a drink that made you think you were okay, it was supposed to leave you void of any feelings whatsoever, but instead it brought them back ten times harder. And it made you do idiotic things, like what happened to his friend John.
He had gone with him to look out for the man, he was heartbroken after all. He had finally gotten his divorce papers signed and cleared, that was that, John was no longer married to the girl he loved to call his 'sweetheart'. John had played it off at first claiming it was no big deal but eventually he drove them to a bar and there he proceeded to drink anything to make the pain ease up, nothing happened. If anything John was more broken than ever, he had take him home but as he drove John taken out his cell phone and dialed, he wasn't sure where he was dailing, maybe a food place.
John had slurred the name Elizabeth and he couldn't help but stare for a bit with his eyes wide. He heard screaming on the other line and once the car came to a stop he looked at John once more. He was smiling while the woman on the phone yelled and yelled, he looked content if not for a second. John's next words had shocked him, made him pity his long-time friend. But John had said them as if there was no problem with them, he had a big grin on his face as he chuckled.
"I miss you Liz, can I come home to you, baby?"
They did say that a drunken mind speaks a sober heart.
He snapped out of his trance when he noticed the small girl slip out of the crowd, his eyes followed her. Trying not to lose her in the sea of dancing bodies, she looked slightly dazed and then he knew she had taken one to many drinks. He stood from his chair and followed closely, why he was following he wasn't sure, after all she'd made it quite clear that she had no interest in coming back permanently, no interest in taking him seriously anymore.
But he followed, like a lost puppy. The girl hadn't taken notice but she would, he would make sure she would. Because next to alcohol her attention was pretty intoxicating.
Would it be better if I just looked ahead and let my sorrow vent out?
Years.
That's what it had taken her to get over him, or at least to pretend she did. She missed him but her reasons for leaving where for his own good, she knew this. She had lied to him, told him she wanted to find a better person to keep at her side, told him she wanted nothing more than to get away from him and this bland, old town.
In truth, she missed this small town, it wasn't much but it was home. Here she came with her step-father and her mother and here she met the love of her life. Here she had made memories with her best friend who never once gave up on her, here she got accepted into the college she wanted to, here she had her first kiss, her first time, here she had it all.
She had come back because her best friend was getting married and she was to be the maid of honor. She was happy for her friend and happy for the life she had built in her absence, but something still nagged at her that if she hadn't been so stupid and weak perhaps she'd be the one to be getting married to the man of her dreams. Perhaps she'd be hosting a get-together for all the bridesmaids and all the groomsmen, but that wasn't the case and it would never be the case.
She had noticed him take interest in her since they saw each other at the airport this morning. He had come along with her brother to collect her, she knew her brother was very close to him and she should've guessed he'd be right there in picking her up. Ever since then he hadn't let her leave his sights, his stare was suffocating, like he wanted her to feel the hate in his eyes, she wasn't stupid she could very well see it in them.
"Are you enjoying yourself?"
She looked at Kaitlyn who was wearing a very big grin, so happy, so careless. How she envied her best friend, she gave a thumbs up and continued to dance. They never would have guessed she was suffering with the fake smile she'd learn how to perfect while she was away. She dance for a bit more before walking off, although she was at a bar she never drank anything, it was something she learned from he. He told her people, foolish people, saw alcohol as a means for escape but that escaping your problems was unheard of, they'd always be there, no matter what.
But before all this she had taken a pill, a pill to keep herself calm, but it seemed they were taking a toll on her this evening. She chuckled softly to herself, perhaps to others she looked as drunk as ever as she stumbled towards the restroom.
She groaned softly as a wave of pain hit her head, perhaps it was time to head home. She shook her head, her brown curls shaking along with her. She couldn't leave, Kaitlyn was expecting her to enjoy herself since she would be leaving right after the wedding. Sometimes she wished she could stay and pick up from where she left off but that seemed so fairy tale-esque and she was taught that fairy tales no matter how precious and amazing they may be, weren't real. She sighed and headed towards the restroom, finally away from all the dancing people, maybe she should've taken a drink or two, at least until the pain partially subsided.
Because even if her problems wouldn't be gone, her pain certainly would be.
I want to breathe but I'm having difficulty here
After she came out, he gripped her arm tightly, this time there was no running away. She wouldn't, no, she couldn't do the same thing to him twice. He looked at her wide eyes and glared, why does she act so surprised?
He wanted to hate her, he'd tried to do it for the past few years but somehow hating her wasn't ever part of the plan. Even now as he starred into those lying, chocolate brown eyes he felt nothing but love towards the small girl.
"You've been reckless," he finally spoke
She looked at him carefully but did not reply, this made him furious. He growled and pushed her against the nearest wall, and as he did so she felt all those feelings rush back. She looked at him with a frown on her face and he merely sneered, he looked so hateful and yet that was the last thing he felt for the girl.
"Where'd you go all these years?" he asked
She looked away from him, "release me."
"Answer my damn question," he snarled
"I moved to New Jersey," she spoke harshly, "not that it's any of your damn business."
He looked absolutely livid at her response as he gripped her chin tightly. She shut her eyes trying to suppress the feelings, those that made her want to kiss him, keep him close. She knew if she kissed him everything would get out of hand and she'd be in for an early flight home to New Jersey. She didn't want him to ruin what she took years to build, it wasn't fair.
"Are you moving back here?"
She opened her eyes then and frowned at the softening of his features. The maddening look seemed to have slipped away and it was no replaced by an expression she'd seen countless of times. One he had never even given to anyone else, only her, that's what made that look all the more special.
"I'm leaving once Kait is married," she spoke firmly, "that's that."
"You could stay," he reasoned stay here, with me.
"I could," she chuckled, "but you and I both know somethings are better left alone, me being here is torture enough, I apologize."
He almost laughed, how wrong his little princess was indeed. Here she thought that he basically wanted her gone, that he hated her, when in fact he wanted her to stay here. Never leave him ever again, his grip on her chin loosened then and he gave her a slanted grin. She merely starred, she wasn't sure what he was thinking, before she remembered how easily it was to read his emotions and know what he was thinking. Now, she wasn't sure what it was his green eyes were hiding or what they were telling.
"You're foolish," he spoke pulling away from her
She watched him and tried to forget the nagging feeling of missing his warmth, "as are you."
"Why do you say that?" he asked
She shook her head and walked off, "don't follow, okay?"
And he didn't, because he knew and she knew that no matter what he would always do what she asked of him. That's how they worked, but as she reached the end of the hall to enter the busy dance area she looked back at him and gave a small smile.
"It was nice to speak with you again," she spoke softly before walking off
He stayed still, a small, that's what she left him with. He sighed and slumped against the wall behind him, he was tired of chasing with no luck. He'd been doing it for years, trying to find someone just like her and now that he had the real one before him he couldn't even describe how every other woman paled in comparison. He looked up at the ceiling and chuckled.
Foolish? Yeah, he was foolish indeed.
Even though I'm alive, I need to make sure
The clock on the wall ticked away and all she did was stare. It seemed she let that happen a lot. She let time pass her by and did nothing as she watched on. She thought a lot of the confrontation between herself and him. It was strange, the last thing she expected was his attention, after all she broke him in the worst way and after that she was sure he hated her.
But then trapped her in between him and the wall and almost kissed her. He held her so close she could still smell the cologne from all those years ago. She was pleased that certain things about him would never change. While he held her there he noticed the animosity in his green eyes and as soon as the animosity came it left and in it's place she got green eyes that softened for her and her only.
"Alright, I'm out, let's get going!"
She looked away from the ticking clock and smiled at her friend. Maryse had offered to keep her in her home until she had to leave for New Jersey again and so far she liked being with the overly dramatic fashionista. Maryse was kind behind that vanity of hers and that's something she always got a kick from seeing.
"So this dinner, where's it at?" she asked softly
"Hmph," she frowned, "not sure, Mike was us up so yeah."
She rolled her eyes at Maryse's inability to let Mike take a break from taking her all places. Mike and Maryse had the most complicated relationship she'd ever seen, for one thing the two had a sort of rivalry in high school. Maryse and Mike just didn't seem like the type to end up together but they had. She however, knew that things between them weren't solid as Mike sucked at defining relationships and Maryse was too well, Maryse, to even put a label on what they had. But nonetheless they saw each other, went on dates and so on.
Once he picked them up they went to the restaurant. Mike and Maryse were chatting about the possibility of Maryse going to Canada for half a year to do some modeling contract she'd been offered. Mike seemed pretty unpleased to say the least as he kept telling her she wasn't going. Maryse merely rolled her eyes and told him that even though they weren't dating they weren't serious so it wasn't a big deal.
That had escalated the fight and that had made her feel like an even bigger third-wheel. She shut her eyes as they shouted back and forth, praying neither remembered she was there because if they did they would ask her to pick a side and she sucked at doing that.
Once they arrived she quickly jumped out of the car and walked into the restaurant -pretty quickly- once she was escorted to where everyone else was she smiled brightly.
"Hey there, where are the lovebirds?" Layla asked
"Fighting," she grumbled,"they need to get over it."
"They do," he spoke, at this she looked at him he was smirking at her, "get over and talk like old times."
She frowned at his choice of words and sighed before plopping down in between Derrick and Layla. Derrick was telling John all about his proposal and John listened intently, the girl she knew to be Mickie at his side. She liked Mickie well enough, she wasn't as quiet as Liz, she hoped John saw her as wife material cause it seemed to be that way. Layla was dabbing Cody's mouth with a napkin much to his chagrin, Kaitlyn was on her phone texting away completely ignoring her soon-to-be husband and his overly dazzled proposal story. Kelly and Randy were teasing each other, so they had grown closer in her absence, interesting. Maryse and Mike were seated next to each other but Maryse was frowning and Mike looked beyond stressed, she sighed softly some things never change then.
"So you going back to New Jersey?"
She looked at Derrick and nodded slowly, "yeah."
"Doesn't make sense," John chuckled taking a sip of his drink, "we're all here, what's so special over there?"
"Work," she responded, "and-"
"And," Layla giggled, "she met someone over there."
She looked at Layla and blushed furiously, the cat was out of the bag. So far, only Kaitlyn, Layla, Maryse, Kelly and even Mickie knew everyone else -being that they were guys- was out of the loop. She noticed Derrick seemed to grin at her and Cody chuckled, John and Randy seemed to be serious as they looked at Punk carefully and Mike seemed to not even pay attention to the conversation before him.
"What's his name?" Cody asked completely unaware of the tension that was slowly forming
"Dolph," she answered, "it's nothing serious, we've been on like-"
"5 dates," Kelly gushed, "he's so sweet to her."
"Yeah," Mickie agreed, "he bought her jewelry on the 4th date, John!"
John merely grinned as he hugged Mickie, "you want jewelry? I'll buy you anything you want."
Mickie rolled her eyes, "silly John."
"So what does he do?" Randy asked
"He's a model," she chuckled scratching her head, "odd pair, I know."
"Well Punk's got a girl too," Cody blurted out
This silenced everyone, Kelly looked slightly shocked at Cody's outburst, Kaitlyn was now looking up from her phone and right at her. She gave a very tight smile, but she knew that it didn't look forced one bit.
"How cool," she chuckled, "we could double date, you know if you two ever go to New Jersey."
"Maybe you should come back and visit," Layla smiled trying to sway the subject
"What's her name again?" Cody asked
She noticed Layla kick Cody's shin and he growled, she would of laughed if the situation wasn't so awkward. She chanced at look at him and watched as his green eyes avoided her.
"Eve," he bit out
"That's right," Cody laughed
For the rest of the night while everyone chatted about the wedding and the things that needed to be finished she managed to keep quiet. She tried her best to not look at him and hoped he wasn't looking at her. She felt angry with him, although she shouldn't have been, he owed her nothing since she left him with nothing.
Once she was in bed her eyes shut and a tear slipped out. She tried not to weep but she couldn't help but feel like a stupid girl.
"Stupid, stupid, stupid, little girl," she whispered out into the room
As though it were comfort, the rain began to fall
He felt angry, betrayed, and confused.
How could she move on so easily when he struggled so much? Eve, she was nothing but someone he had met on a coffee run. She had a nice smile, nice everything but she was superficial and he didn't quite like that. But Eve still managed to cling at his arm and make everyone believe he was into her, he wasn't, but the last thing he needed was a weeping woman.
She on the other hand had spoke of this Dolph like it was nothing. Her friends knew of their relationship and he felt angry at that. No one had told him about it, had he known perhaps he'd look at her much more differently this time around. He felt betrayed because she promised years ago that she'd love no one but him and he was confused because when he spoke of Eve her beautiful, chocolate brown eyes seemed to be filled with disappointment.
He ran a hand through his hair, he had less than a week before she was off again. He looked at the window and noticed the rain falling madly down his window. He sighed softly and laid back on his bed. It was times like these that he missed her so much, times like these where he wished she was right there sleeping with him.
But no, she had a boyfriend.
Three buzzes and his thoughts were interrupted. He looked at his phone and sighed before picking it up. He didn't check the caller ID as he answered with a groggy 'hello'.
"What's up your panties, you sound like you woke from the dead."
Colt . His idiotic friend, best friend, calling in the middle of the night probably to pester him about Eve or something of the sort. He sighed and ran his hand over his face, since sleep wasn't taking over he decided to entertain Colt and his stupid ideas.
"You realize it's like 2 in the morning," he told him
"Whatever, details, detail," he chuckled, "so I hear she's back."
He knew who he was talking about, the one girl that Colt approved of for him.
"She is," he spoke trying to sound uncaring
"How does it feel?"
"It feels like nothing's happened," he lied, "I don't care for her, you know."
"I'm your best friend, have been for many years," Colt told him, "and I know you care, more than you want to, even."
He sighed, he should've known, "so what? Doesn't change anything."
"Have you tried to change anything?" Colt asked, "you know, you want things to be solved by merely waiting, things in this world don't work out like that."
"What do I do?" he asked, "the wedding is in two days, she leaves the afternoon after that day, I've got no chance."
"Always the pessimist," Colt laughed, "but you know, two days is enough to show her."
"Show her?"
"You mean what you say," Colt sighed
"What if she won't stay?" he asked, "I can't force her."
"No, but if she doesn't than that's that," Colt told him, "your much needed closure."
After a few more words Colt hung up claiming he was hungry and in need of sleep. He sighed and threw his phone somewhere in the corner of his room. He had no interest in sleeping, two days, it was all he had before she left once again. He starred up at the ceiling and sighed, all this time he was complaining when it was he who never made and effort to keep her here. Years ago he let her get on that plane, he let her walk away without so much as an explanation.
"You're so stupid," he called out into the darkness
I simply look up into the dark as a diver without a means of surfacing
The wedding was simple and breathtakingly beautiful.
Everyone seemed happy, Mike had dropped down on one knee after the ceremony and asked Maryse to marry him. Maryse had agreed and when he hugged her she swore that he heard Mike whisper in her friend's ear that now she had a reason to stay here.
Layla and Cody were expecting a baby, which was something she never expected. Layla was informed yesterday of the baby, learning she was three months along and she was delighted, even Cody seemed to be much more happy with his life.
Mickie and John had decided to move in together, she knew this was big for John after his divorce but she also knew Mickie was good for him. She was going to make a wonderful wife for him in the future, and even though she hadn't known Mickie for too long she wanted her happiness above all.
Randy had finally plucked up the courage -after Cody and Derrick's constant teasing- and asked Kelly out on a date, but as his girlfriend. The blonde girl had giggled and have given him a kiss on the lips, this caused Randy to turn slightly red and it ensued that Cody and Derrick tease him once again but this time he didn't seem to mind.
She watched with a smile on her lips as Kaitlyn and Derrick shared their first dance as husband and wife. She was proud of her friend, they both came of families with one less parent than the rest and that's what bonded them so well. Finally, after years of working hard for the things she wanted Kaitlyn finally had her fairy tale wedding, the one she wrote about in her journal.
Everyone was happy, and even if she wasn't happy for herself she was happy for everyone else. She looked at her watch and frowned, the party was coming to and end and that meant her time here was too.
"Wanna dance?"
"You should be taking it easy, you have a child now," she grinned
"Come on," she chuckled, "don't be a party pooper
She followed Layla onto the dance floor and dance the rest of the night away. In the afternoon tomorrow, she'd leave with regret and with pain but it was to be done. Because she had nothing to stay here for, her job and future boyfriend were waiting at home for her.
She'd leave because that's how it was supposed to be.
She without him and he without her, there was no way around it, even if she wished there was.
Even though I'm alive, I need to be perfectly sure
He was late, he knew, but he would make it and she would stay.
"Come on, move!" he honked his horn
He was livid, anxious, and completely in love. Her flight was leaving soon and he just had to get there, scratch that, he would get there. He needed her to hear his words, whether she decided to stay was up to his words. If she accepted them then he'd know, if she threw them away like she threw their love away then he'd forget.
He shook his head, no sense in thinking that way. He hated losing and losing her was not an option anymore. Last night things seemed tense and she barely spared him a glance but he could see the pain in her eyes and that made him want to tell her all this sooner, but the right time wasn't last night it was now. He chuckled as he finally entered the airport's parking lot and once he parked he grabbed his keys, locked his car and rushed inside, ignoring everyone who tried to stop him.
After all, she was all he had left and he'd be damned before he let her get away a second time.
I'll try my hand at breathing
"Be careful, call me when you land, don't take food from strangers."
"Yes mom," she laughed at Kaitlyn's pout
"I'm going to miss you pip," John chuckled picking her up in a tight hug
"Same here," she chuckled
"Make sure you give us all a call," Maryse told her
"I will," she smiled brightly
"And since you came to Kaitlyn's wedding you're coming to mine," Maryse told her with a smirk
"Fine," she chuckled, "Lay, send lots of pictures once Jr's out!"
"Sure thing," Layla chuckled hugging her friend along with Maryse
"Derrick and Cody behave and don't bully poor Randy," she smirked
"Fine, only for you," Cody chuckled giving her a fist pump
"Yes ma'am," Derrick did a mock solute and she played along
"You know, you don't have to leave," Randy laughed, "there's people here who need you."
She gave him a hug and shook her head, "I can visit, staying is out of the question."
"Boo," Kelly pouted, "bye bye sweetie!"
"Bye Kells," she smiled and hugged the blonde girl
"Tell your boy toy to send me some pictures, autographed," Kaitlyn waved at her
"He'll think I'm a freak," she laughed
"Bye, hope to see you soon," Mickie smiled brightly
They hugged and she agreed, "yeah, careful with John, he can be, well John."
"Ouch, I'm wounded."
"No problem," Mickie winked, "take care of yourself."
"Take care of my 'Ryse, Mike, or I'll chop your balls off," she grinned
"No problem, pip-squeak," Mike smirked giving her a hug as well
She gave them all a final goodbye and a wave as she headed towards her gate. They watched her go with frowns on their faces and wondered where the hell the one person who could of stopped her was.
She sighed softly as she wheeled her carry on towards the plane, she was nervous again, this felt oddly like when she left all those years ago. She sighed softly and kept moving until something stopped her. Someone gripped her wrist, she gasped and turned around coming face to face with him.
"You're here," she whispered
"For you," he told her
"You shouldn't be here," she told him sternly
"Why leave again?" he asked
"Because that's how it's supposed to be," she answered
"Stay," he told her, "with me."
At this she looked into his piercing green eyes and frowned, how could he? How could he come here and demand she stay, she felt her resolve crumble as she watched him lean down towards her. A before she knew it a kiss was pressed on her lips. She shut her eyes and let the feeling slip back into her, she released her carry-on and gripped his jacket tightly.
"I've never loved anyone as much as I love you," he spoke in between kisses
"Neither have I," she answered once he pulled away
"What's making you leave?"
"Fear," she answered, "fear that things will go down hill and I'll end up with nothing, that we'll both end up with nothing."
"Stay," he told her, "stay and let me prove you wrong."
She looked down before looking back up again, "I'm scared."
"Don't be," he leaned in again, "I've told you, haven't I? Once you fall I'll be right there ready to catch you."
"Then you should kiss me," she told him with a small smile, "kiss me and wash the fear all away, prove me wrong, Punk."
"Gladly, A.J," he smirked and once again pressed his lips to hers
A.J smiled into the kiss, so this was happiness? It was just as she remembered it, the warm feeling that came with it, she loved it. Once she pulled away she smiled and Punk didn't fail to notice that this time her chocolate brown eyes seemed to be much brighter than the first night of their encounter.
And all of that was for him and him only.
He kissed her once again and A.J smiled, I'm finally home.
If I could come to realize just a fraction of happiness, I would never drown again
There's that, and I hope you enjoyed! Please review, thank you. x