Dimitri's Remorse

by shockhorror

“To answer both of your questions.” I say, before turning to my younger self. “I know because I am YOU, Dimitri. Almost 400 years from now!” [ArchieVerse] [OneShot]

I used to have so much, but I didn't appreciate any of it until it was all gone.
Despite all my smarts, I was a fool. The recklessness and arrogance of my youth is what made me what I am today - and I don't believe any other person has experienced such a dramatic rise and fall in power in one lifetime. Of course, my lifetime has been considerably longer than your average echidna's. Though longer, it definitely has not been any more fulfilling.

I was born like any other. But then, several years into adulthood, a bad decision and the power of eleven Chaos Emeralds transformed me into the mighty Enerjak! I am not going to lie, being Enerjak felt great!
I wreaked havoc as I could until buried beneath my own city of darkness. I rose to spread chaos again, but from there, things went downhill extremely quickly.
I was stripped of my power, and centuries of aging that should have been my end caught up with me. Though my Dark Legion 'saved me,' In truth I was reduced to an unholy fusion of metal and flesh. My health was not at its best as my body de-toxicated itself of the Chaos Energy, and so I was reduced even further. My entire body was amputated, and now I am nothing more than a cybernetic head. It was almost comical, but it was necessary, and at that point, I was still desperate to linger on.

However, that was not the way I wanted my life to be when I look back on it as a wizened old man. I didn't want to be the heart of such a great amount of suffering and disharmony among my people, even if I thought I did for the longest time.
It is through my own malicious manipulation that I cannot say that I am proud of my own son. And that, I can say, is the most heartbreaking thing a father can ever admit to himself, and something I will regret for the rest of my life.
That being said, I am more than just a father. I am a Great, Great, Great Grand-Father. And it is entirely my own fault that my all of my descendants have not been able to experience the normal, peaceful lives that they should have.

When I look back to the days of when my life was like any other, over 300 years ago, I remember wanted nothing more than to use my intelligence and knowledge as a means to help people. I was highly ambitious. I was also arrogant and reckless, yes, among a number of other undesirable qualities, but I was certainly not unkind. My brother and I had a brilliant plan to reunite the then-called Floating Island with Mother Mobius. So how could things have gone so horribly wrong?

If I were to die right now, Aurora herself could not hope to forgive me. After the trouble I've caused, who could?

I know only one person who could.
My great-grand nephew, some 17 generations removed.
Knuckles the Echidna.
As selfless as I could never be, he sacrificed his own life to save me, despite all the problems I've caused for him. As Enerjak, I nearly killed him, no less!
Edmund truly was the better brother – just look at what his blood-line have produced. But he died many lifetimes ago – through a chain of events being indirectly at my own hands, I believe. Knuckles may have forgiven me for his murder, but I certainly haven't.

But rather than just wallowing in my own lament, I have done everything I have since regaining my sense of perspective to make things right. It has not been easy, with deep mistrust on one side, and on the other side, my elder Great, Great, Grand-Daughter so hopelessly power-hungry yet as treacherous as she had been born and bred to be - but with her following threatening to collapse all around her.

So, they have been agonizingly slow and fruitless efforts.
But finally, after all these years, I have been given a chance to set things right.

And so here I am, wandering the Echidnaopolis Hall of Learning- almost 400 years ago. This was where my brother and I did most of our research and study in preparation for the proposed 'Descent of the Floating Island.'
It had taken Knuckles considerable amounts of convincing to send me back here. He argued that he'd tried to prevent my birth as Enerjak and the dividing of the Echidna race himself, but had almost irreversibly damaged the time-space continuum and put a lot of lives at risk in the process.
But I believe that he hadn't gone about the problem the right way. Rather than using force or manipulation to alter a pivotal event in history, I think that I know a way to do this successfully, without risking the Island's security against outside forces.

But I got Knuckles to send me back just far enough to enjoy the nostalgia of simpler times.
It was a time before Guardians and Dark Legions and Master Emeralds. It certainly brings back pleasant memories, to wander these halls again. Where I once spent most of my days, immersing myself in the wonder of science, and the entire worlds of possibilities it opened up.
Unfortunately, it is about time for me to find myself.

As much as I would like to see my wife, Lien-Ka, and fresh, untainted Menniker, I wouldn't know where to begin to find them. Not to mention that there would be too much I would want to say in too little time. But if my memory serves me well, I'll be able to meet another long-lost family member.

I come to a stop outside a door marked 'Lab 505.' The council is just about to deny our plan. I believe that Edmund and I are just back from the Chaos Chamber, and are preparing our presentation to the council.
The sensor above the door senses movement, and it opens with a smooth 'Swish!'
If I still had a heart, it would be thumping like mad.
Here goes nothing.

I hover in.

Across the room, I see the backs of two echidnas, so absorbed with their work that they didn't even notice me enter.

"-get the Syphon prototype, we'll need that in the presentation. The council will want to actually see what we'll be using to-"

It was Edmund. Just hearing his voice again… I did my best to suppress the emotion that had swelled up inside me. My foolish brother, my spineless brother, I once called him? The Chaos energy truly distorted my memory of him. I had almost forgotten those dorky glasses he used to wear…

"Right, right."

It was me this time. An unusual taste builds up in my mouth. I'm not quite sure what to make of it.

"And make sure you have all your cue-cards and in order – the last thing we need is to cock up the explanation when High Councilor Menthor has already made it very clear that he'll do anything he can to prevent us from winning over the rest of the Scientific Elite. Just remember, as long as we present it exactly as rehearsed, there's no way the Chief Magistrate can-"

"I wouldn't worry about them." Edmund interrupts me, his voice overly light and cheerful in attempt to veil his own nerves. "I have faith in you, brother. You won't steer this island wrong, I know it."

I have to put a stop to this sick, cruel irony.

"Ahem." I splutter in attempt to get them to notice me. Both Edmund and the Younger Me spin on our chairs to face me.

"W-What in the name of Aurora are YOU?" Younger Me cries, looking somewhat disgusted at the sight of me.
I am slightly stung by my own remark, which I quickly shake off on the grounds that it is ridiculous to be offended by myself.

I sigh. I might as well get the difficult part over and done with.
"Firstly, don't get your hopes up. The Council isn't going to accept your plan."

Edmund looks a little shaken. Younger Me looks dumbfounded.
"What makes you say that?" Edmund asks. "Just who are you?"

"To answer both of your questions." I say, before turning to my younger self. "I know because I am YOU, Dimitri. Almost 400 years from now!"

The room is silent for a beat.

"BWAHAHAHAAAAAA!"

I'm laughing at myself! I'm positively bawling my eyes out for laughing! Of all the most disrespectful things-

"-AHAAAA! Did Menthor send you to distract me before the presentation? AAAAHahaha!..."

Younger Me notices that I'm not amused.

"I'm serious." I can't help but snarl.
"Prove it." Younger Me retorts.

I search my memory for something that would prove to me without a doubt that I really am who I say I am.

"Edmund, you remember your working model rocket?" I say shrewdly. "The one you got for your eighth birthday?"
Edmund looks utterly bemused as to how we managed to start talking about his old model rocket.

"Remember how upset you were when Dimitri here told you that some bigger kids had stolen it? Before you had even got a chance to make its first launch…"
Edmund seemed to remember. Not that he was very upset; he was a grown man now. But my Younger Self – He looked as though he was catching on – and he didn't like it one bit.

"I guess Dimitri never did tell you about how what had really happened was he'd decided to take it for its maiden voyage himself. About how it ended up in three loosely connected pieces halfway up a tree. I believe the shattered remains are still buried in the backyard of the old house to this very day?"
Edmund looked at Younger Me in mock anger.
"Dimitri how could you! I-"
He stops, catching the look on Younger Me's face. I don't stop, however.

"And remember that awful crush you had on Sara-Na in the Academy, Dimitri? Needless to say, she didn't think much of you, did she? She was too old for you anyway, what made you think she'd ever go for a science-geek like you?"

Younger Me looks shocked, lost for words.
"What about where you really were that night you were late home that night. Any more secrets you would like me to reveal? I have plenty… Who cheated on who with who, Who really said what, who's fault was - "

"No, s-stop it! T-te-tell me who you really are!" Younger Me says, trembling and on the verge of shouting. "How do you know all this? I never told anyone about this!"

Was I really that slow on the uptake back then?
"I'll tell you again, I AM you. That is why I know these things."
"From… 400 years…?"
"Yes."

Younger Me's eyes widened with shock. He sat still and rigid for a second. The colour drained out of his face and his breathing became sharp and laboured. His expression was that of dumbstruck hopelessness. I almost felt sorry for him.
But I don't feel sorry for myself.
"Brother, are you-" Edmund begins softly.

"HOW DID I GET LIKE THIS?" Younger me shouts suddenly, jumping of his seat and clutching each side of my orb, holding me at arms length. "WHAT HAPPENED TO ME? TELL ME!"

"A lot of things." I say, my patience running thin. "Nothing all that pleasant, I can assure you. That is why I am here – to prevent you from ever becoming me. You are about to make the biggest mistake of your life, and I'm trying to give you the foresight that you don't have right now to stop it from happening."

Edmund speaks up.
"Wait, wait, wait, I don't understand… how can you be 400 years old? That's impossible! … right?"

"It IS possible when you're infused with the power of eleven chaos emeralds!"
Both of them gasp and recoil slightly.
"Your plan is going to be rejected by the Council today. They think it is too dangerous, and they're right. It is."
I give them a moment to absorb this.

"They can't! We've put too much time and effort into this project! Our blood, sweat and tears, we-"
"The Council Elders don't care! But more importantly is what happens next. What happened to me, at any rate. After being denied, I couldn't believe the nerves, or lack thereof, of those cowardly, gutless members of the Council."

"As they would be if they were to reject our plan! It's fool-prop!" Younger Me interrupts. I choose to ignore my own rudeness.

"That's what I thought. And I know what you would do next." I say. "Because that is exactly what I did! I took the Chaos Syphon and began the process in the Chaos Chamber – whether the Council approved of it or not."

Edmund shakes his head.
"I'm still finding it hard to believe that this is really you… You wouldn't do something like that, Dimitri!" He says to Younger Me.

"In my haste to drain the energy, I was careless. The Chaos Syphon backfired, and infused me with the power of eleven of the twelve Chaos Emeralds keeping this island floating. I was then no longer you, Dimitri the Scientist. I was a powerful entity known to all as Enerjak. But it was you, Edmund, with the help of the fire-ants, who put a stop to me, and buried me beneath my own dark monument."

Younger Me casts Edmund a dark, awkward glance, an equally as awkward glance returned.

"Long story short, Menniker is so distraught over my death and he blames his uncle for surviving. Under my delusional, telepathic guidance, he forms the Dark Legion, a secret society who cling to the technology that the people already had voted to renounce in penance for my mistakes. Generations and centuries later, the Dark Legion became one with the technology itself. When your - my power is eventually stripped from… us, all that can be saved is what you see in front if you today.

Edmund, you have to make sure this Island still has the protection it needs for generations to come. What you have to do, Dimitri, is accept the council's decision without doing anything… stupid." I add, just make sure the message hits home.

Edmund is silent.
Younger Me is silent.
I am silent.
The silence hangs in the air like a damp cloth, when suddenly Younger Me speaks up.

"Why should I, though?" he says, his eyes suddenly flashing with manic determination. "Why should I listen to what you say? I won't make the same mistakes as you did!"

I shake my head in frustration. When will he realise?
"But you will! Can't you see? You are the same as me in every way, because you ARE me! The difference between a having happy life for yourself and those around you, and making the same grave mistakes all over again is whether or not you heed my advice!"

Younger Me is either not listening to me, or in denial. Or both.
"That kind of power could do wonders for Echidnaopolis, if it is put to proper use! Just because you botched the job when you realized that, does not mean that I will! I won't make the same mistakes you did! My future is not set out in front of me!" he says with force, leaning his face in close to mine.

"No, it doesn't have to be, if you just listen to what I say. I am speaking from experience! This is not what you want!"

I should have known. My younger self is determined he is right. I always had to be right.
"How do I know? How do I know this isn't what I want?" He says through his teeth.

"Because this isn't what I wanted!"

"My future is NOT set out in front of me!" Younger Me says again, much more forcefully. "You're blaming me for something that hasn't even happened yet!"

"Dimitri, maybe we should listen to… you! You wouldn't have come back unless it was important, would you?" Edmund says, putting a comforting hand on Younger Me's shoulder, which Younger me shrugs off irritably. I give myself a stern glare.

"You should listen to your brother, Dimitri. He has far more wisdom now than 400 years will ever give you."

My Younger Self seemed to have no reply to this. His face is set gravely, and he's not looking me in the eye.

It's time for me to pull out the big ammunition.

"Will you not take heed of me for our brother's sake? Our mistake will cost him his life!"

With an audible choking sound, Edmund slips backwards off his chair.
"Dimitri! Listen to him for Aurora's sake!" Edmund cries, panic worming its way into his voice.

"You're being selfish, Dimitri. Just like you always have." I whisper so only he can hear. "If you won't listen to me for him, then what about for your son?"

My Younger Self has screwed up his eyes and bowed his head. I think he's trying to stop himself from crying. I think I am too, but I can't be sure with these cybernetic eyes.

"You love Menniker, don't you? You do love your own son? He looks up to his father, you know. And what about his son? And his son? And his son? Do you really want to bestow your sins and your misguided wishes upon them?"

My younger self lets out a frustrated roar.

Next thing I know, I'm on the other side of the room, amongst test-tubes and beakers, and a nice big crack right across the side of my glass orb. I'm a little dazed, but not badly hurt.
"You're wrong!" he shrieks at me, breathing heavily from the effort of his throw. "I don't – I don't need this right now!"

"Come on Edmund." My Younger Self says suddenly, in a completely different, more pleasant voice, as he pulls a still-stunned Edmund up off the floor. "We should go now - we don't want to be late for our own presentation."

My Younger Self rolls up some large diagrams, looking away from Edmund and I. Edmund casts him an extremely concerned look – whether for his own well being, or his brother's, I don't know.Dimitri then stops, slacks his stiff shoulders, then turns and gives Edmund a large, comforting smile.
"Don't worry, brother. Just like you said, I won't steer this island wrong!"

Edmund grins back, somewhat nervously.
"Too right." He says, before grabbing the prototype Chaos Syphon, and following his brother out the door. Before passing through, he quickly flashes me a sad, pitying look, which I return whole-heartedly.
As Younger Me has already made his decision, I start to feel what's left of my body fall away from this time line. Before I disappear, I call out after my Younger Self;

"For everyone's sakes, Dimitri, I hope that you are right!"

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