Chapter 36

Bella

I already arranged with Sam that puppies presents would go first, but that Embry would open his after that. It's kind of for everyone, and I didn't want to upstage other presents after they'd been given. Only Sam and the elders know what's up.

I love watching how kind everyone is when they get presents. Shouts of "This is awesome, man! Thanks!" There are hugs and fistbumps. Everybody looking happy at both the giving and the receiving. I love this so much. Embry drops his arm around me and pulls me up on his lap.

"Is this okay?" he whispers into my ear. His breath tickles a little, but in a delicious way that sends tingles down my spine. I nod and lean all the way back into him. Every part of the back of my body in contact with his body. His warmth seeps into my skin and I shiver in delight. I hadn't even realized how cold I was. Am. I'm still always cold without out a wolf nearby. My wolf especially. I can feel my body relax and melt into him.

"Don't fall asleep, Bella!" Jake calls from the other side of the small room. "You haven't given Embry his present yet!"

"Maybe we're not allowed to see what's in there," Quil says, waggling his eyebrows.

I feel Embry chuckle softly behind me.

"Damn," I say with pretend concern. "I knew I shouldn't have brought the present with handcuffs here."

At least 6 of the wolves snort or sputter at this, but before anyone can comment, Sam steps in with his pack leader voice. "Bella, why don't you go ahead."

I suddenly feel a little icy ball of nerves lodge in my stomach. What if this isn't what they want? No. Sam thought they'd want it, too. I leave the warmth and comfort of my love's lap feeling a little shy.

"Um. Ok. So, Embry. This is for you. But it's kind of for all of you, too." I hand Embry the box and hope for the best.

Embry

Bella is chewing on her lip again when I take the beautifully wrapped package from her. She's nervous about this and I don't know why. She must know that I'll love anything she gives me. Hell, I don't even need a present. I have her. This whole Christmas season has been better than anything I've ever had just because of her. She takes care of people. Not just me. But everyone. She takes care in little ways. So I will gratefully take her present, but I don't ever need anything else from her.

I notice her fidgeting with her hands and biting her lip. I can smell her anxiety. Geesh. What's in this box? I flick my eyes over to the puppies who seem to have focused their attention on her in concern. I whisper, "Go to her", so softly that only the other wolves can hear what I've said. And in a flash, those kids are across the room and surrounding her in a flurry of hugs.

"Bella, thank you so much for the game! It's sick! Will you try playing with me? Pleeeeease!" Collin begs while picking her up in a hug.

"Forget it, loser! She's gonna play against me first!" Brady says pulling her over to him. "Please, please, please! I won't even make you bring snacks!"

Seth is just starting in on her when she bursts into giggles.

"You guys! Put me down! I want to see Embry open his present!"

They put her down and Seth winks at me. She's smiling and flushed and happy again.

I rip the paper off as Quil says, "I wanna see those cuffs, Em! Are they the fuzzy kind?"

It's a small cardboard box which I open and see only a stack of papers.

I'm not sure what I'm looking at, so I glance at Bella who is back at her lip.

I quickly lift them from the box and begin to look over them. They look like…

"College applications?" I ask. I don't understand. I can't go to school. What is this? If it were anyone other than her, I'd call it cruel.

"Sam?" Bella calls out. She sounds a little desperate.

"Those aren't handcuffs," Quil complains.

"Shut up, Quil," Sam barks. "Embry, those are for you. And for any of the rest of us who are old enough and want to go. Bella brought the idea of how the California pack does it to me and forced me to take it to the council. It took a few weeks, but they eventually agreed. There are some stipulations. You have to be within 4 hours of home. You'll come home and patrol one weekend a month and your breaks if you're living away. The guys who are still living here will get more regular patrols, but lighter. It's not just for college either. If any of you want to go to a trade school or something like that, you're free to pursue that, too."

"I can go to college?" I say, and drop my head down when my voice cracks a little with emotion.

This changes everything.

Everyone is talking and yelling at once.

"Embry?" I hear Bella whisper as she touches my shoulder. "Hey, are you okay?"

I'm going to cry. I scoop up the papers and grab her hand. "Can we go? I mean. I don't want to force you, but I need to go."

She looks worried, "Of course! Let me just get my coat. You go. I'll meet you outside by my truck."

She pushes me out while everyone is still talking.

Bella

Dammit! I don't know if he's okay or not. He seems dazed. The rest of the pack seems excited, though. So that's something.

I hug Emily and thank her for hosting and let her know where I'm going. She nods in understanding. "Hey," she says, "Love you, girl. Sam is so excited about this, too. Thanks for pushing it."

I hug her again. "Love you, too."

I go out the back door and into the frosty night air. The damp chill seeps right back into my bones. I shudder for a moment. I still can't completely disassociate cold with the Cullens. So the smell of winter kind of messes with me still. I try to shake it off then I lightly jog around to the front of the house where my truck is.

Embry is there. I relax a little and slow down. Crap. His shoulders are hunched and hands in fists at his side. And he feels...upset. Oh, Dear God. Is he going to tell me to go away? Does he hate me? I don't understand. I'm filled with the icy dread I once felt right before the Cullens left.

"Embry?" I say softly, but my voice still cracks a little.

Embry

I knew she was there, but it's not until I hear her voice sound so small and broken that I turn sharply to her. Shit! She's as white as a bloodsucker and looks like she's about to fall over. I rush to her and grab her up in my arms.

"Bella, what's wrong?" I'm touching her everywhere, but I can't find anywhere that might be hurt. I feel her take a big breath. "You're not leaving?" she asks.

"Leaving? Bella, what the actual hell are you talking about?"

"You looked so mad. So resolute. So… I mean… you looked like… It just reminded me of…," she stops and looks down at her feet. "I'm sorry," she whispers.

A part of me wants to get mad at her for even suggesting that I'm anything like that vamp, but I can feel her right now. I scared her bad. I'm never supposed to be the one that scares her. I draw her close more tenderly this time. She's a little rigid against me for a few moments before I feel her arms come around me.

"Bella, I didn't want to cry in front of everyone. That's all. You gave me what I've always wanted. I...It was just a lot. This year has been a lot of getting everything I've wanted after a lot of years of having nothing. Knowing about my Dad, knowing who my family is, getting to love you, finding out that we're really meant to be together, and now this. It was just more than I was prepared for."

"So, you're happy?" Bella asks sounding better.

"YES!" I laugh and roll my eyes at her.

"Good. Did you look at all the papers?" she asks

"Oh. Um...no. Sorry, I'll…"

"No," she cuts me off. "My Dad's working tonight. Let's go back to my house for a while, ok? You can look there."

"Ok," I say and pick her up in my arms and carry her to the door of her truck. "I love it when you get bossy with me," I say and kiss her once before closing the door.

Bella

We drive for a couple of minutes in quiet. His eyes are bright and he's clearly thinking. I recognize the "in my head" look well enough from it being one of my own personal looks in most pictures as a kid.

"I know I couldn't afford it anyway, but I wish I could go to school closer to you, but still this whole thing is awesome, Bella!" he suddenly blurts out.

"It's probably too late to apply to most schools other than community colleges for the fall, but you could probably start winter semester," I say. He nods and is back in his head again, but his hand is holding onto my leg as I drive. Almost to tether himself here.

We pull up in front of the house and climb out of the truck. Embry doesn't carry me here. He's good at code-switching. He gets very articulate, respectful, and polite when we're in town. On the rez, he's much more relaxed. I feel bad that he has to feel a little on edge here, but at least he doesn't have to worry about the cops in this town. The guys have told me horror stories about cops and Natives in other towns.

We reach the front porch and I unlock the door. As soon as we get into the living room, Embry starts turning on lights and sits on the couch to start looking at the papers more closely. I smile. His enthusiasm is genuine. I text my Dad to let him know where I am and that Embry is with me. Whenever I do this, he is EXTRA loud when he gets home. Stomping up the stairs after slamming his cruiser door hard just so he doesn't interrupt anything. It makes me giggle.

"Bella?"

I look up to see Embry staring at one piece of paper. He found it.

"This is an acceptance letter."

"Yup," I say, trying to sound nonchalant.

"For you."

"Yes."

"To transfer to UW," he says incredulously.

"That's right."

He puts down the paper slowly and looks at it for another minute. "But, Bella, why would you leave Berkeley? It's a great school!"

"Because my heart isn't there." I hold my hand up to him before he interrupts, "Other than Victor and Alex, (okay, and Renee) everyone I love is right here, Embry. I can get a good education for a lot less money here in Washington. Going to California was a knee-jerk reaction. I mean, yeah, it IS a great school, but I applied when I thought I wouldn't be able to stand the memories of this place."

"And now?" he asks.

"I still have sad and scary memories here, but I have so many that are full of love and joy and fun and friendship and laughter. And shouldn't home have a little bit of that? Embry, we've proved that mates don't have to be joined at the hip, but I don't want to be so far from you. Even if we could just see each other once a month for a whole weekend, wouldn't that be-

Embry

I cut off whatever she's going to say with my mouth on hers. I'm so hungry for her. I can't get enough of the taste of her. She sighs just a little into my mouth and I hoist her up my body and turn to let her lean against the wall so we can both use our hands for more than just hanging on. She moans into my mouth when my hands grab her hips and I find myself pressing harder against her. I can feel the wolf getting insistant. "Mine! Mate! Good! Take!" I'm about to pull away when I hear her whisper sort of desperately, "Embry, upstairs, please!"

And then we're there on her bed and clothes are disappearing and I didn't ever think it was possible to feel this much at once. It's like every single square centimeter of skin is alive and aware of how her body is touching mine. I can't believe anyone in the history of the world has ever felt as good as I do right now. Her mouth and hands are tracing over my body sometimes fast and grabby, sometimes with such a slow, light touch I feel like I must be imagining it. I gasp every time. I'm so not cool. I've seen EVERYTHING about how to please a woman in the guys' heads, but I can't even remember I have arms right now because I'm so busy just feeling. As her mouth places open mouthed kisses up my hip bone, her long hair brushes over my swollen cock which I'm positive has never been this hard ever. I need pressure. I need her. And all of a sudden she's laying on top of me. Her soft, slender leg in between mine as she applies that pressure I was just dying for.

Bella

Not sex. Not all the way. Not yet. But soon. I love the powerful feeling I get sensing his reactions as I explore his body. I'm doing that to him! I was barely allowed to touch Edward. He almost made me feel...dirty. Dirty for wanting this kind of closeness. This incredible amount of feeling. It's almost like Embry knows I need this. This control of the situation. He is perfect for me. I giggle softly to myself as I nestle on top of him. I press my leg in between his, so I'm straddling his hip. Oh, that feels so good. After exploring his body, I can assure anyone that he really IS perfect. I am a lucky, lucky girl. Mmmm. I rock into him a little as I kiss him. Our bodies feel so good together! Is it even possible that other people feel like this? How does everyone else just not do THIS all the time? Embry moans as I rock a little harder, a little faster, too. Suddenly his hands are gripping my hips and pressing me closer. He breaks our kiss and gasps my name. Oh, that is just so damn sexy! I keep rocking and kissing him and the longer it goes on, the slicker everything is. Despite the cold outside, we seem to be generating plenty of heat inside. We're sweaty and I'm so turned on I feel like an open faucet of want. We're sliding in a perfect rhythm now and I can feel his breath start to accelerate. He's more insistent in his movements. He suddenly goes rigid and then explodes as he moans loudly. I can feel how hot he is inside and out as the wetness is between us up my hip and belly. I smile triumphantly. I did that to him!

He goes limp and relaxed just for a moment before saying "Bella, you, too!"

I pull my gaze back up and look at him. "Oh. I'm okay."

He growls and rolls us over and suddenly HIS mouth is everywhere on me! He tastes my nipples and when he sucks on one a little, I feel a pull between my legs. I may not survive how good this is! I whimper a little and suddenly he's licking his way down my belly and then gives me a look. It's equal parts cocky, questioning, and longing. I nod, and then his mouth is somewhere no mouth has been before. Holy hell! He licks at me 1 time and I practically fold in half it feels so good! He grins broadly and bends his head to do it again. Once more and I'm melting with desire. It's not enough! He licks one more time with his broad flat tongue and then starts to suck and before I realize what I'm doing, my hands are fisting his hair pulling him tighter against me and I know I'm so close. He moves my feet over his shoulders instead of on the bed and it opens me just a little more and suddenly, I'm gone. I shout and grip his hair and feel the waves of pleasure roll over me, and suddenly I'm giggling as I try to catch my breath! My ears are ringing and I can feel my pulse everywhere.

Embry reaches up to unfist my fingers from his hair which I'm still gripping as I ride these waves. "Oh! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to hurt you!"

"You didn't hurt me," he says, with a very self satisfied smile on his face as he wipes it a little with his hand. He's adorable. Even when he's being cocky, he's still the most kind and sweet of all the wolves.

"Hey,' I whisper, pulling at him to lay next to me.

"Hey," he whispers back as our foreheads touch.

"I love you so much, Embry Call."

"I love you, too, Isabella Marie Swan."

"I wish you could sleep here tonight," I whisper.

"Me, too," he whispers and gathers me in his arms and rolls onto his back with me on top of him. "We should clean up and look presentable before your Dad gets home. I don't want to have to explain the fast healing when he shoots me, which he totally will if he finds us like this."

"Shower?" I ask.

"Yes, please. Will you wash my hair again? That felt really good that night," he asks, looking a little sheepish.

I kiss him. "Of course I will! Wanna wash mine, too? You have experience with long hair, so I think you can be trusted," I tease.

He lightly swats my backside. "None of your sass! Let's go!"

"Actually, Embry, that's my ass, not my sass!" I tease, and he snorts with laughter as he lifts me up.

Embry

I throw her over my shoulder to head to the shower. "Wait!" she protests.

"What?"

"I need to open the window a little and light a candle. My room… uh…"

"Smells like sex?" I prompt.

She blushes for the first time tonight. "Ha. Yes."

"My wolf loves it, and to me it really does. I didn't realize humans could smell that, too."

I put her down. How creepy would it be if I asked to borrow her blanket? It smells the best! I smell the sharp scent of the lit match and turn towards her.

"Sorry! I know you're sensitive to perfumes, but Charlie is too damn clever for my own good. Help me smooth out the bed?"

"That candle isn't terrible. It smells clean," I say, surprised.

"You can thank the hippies of Berkeley. It's a soy candle with essential oils or something. They said it was good for people with allergies. I know you don't have an allergy, but.."

"You thought of me when you were buying a candle for your room?" I say.

"I always think about you, Embry," she says. And it's so matter-of-fact. So simple. My heart clenches.

Bella

We're all fresh and clean and sitting on the couch with my laptop researching colleges when Charlie stomps up the steps.

"Hey, Dad!" I call when he opens the door, also loudly. He's so funny.

He takes in the view of us sitting there and drops the suspicious face. "Hey, kids. How was the party?"

"It was great! The puppies all loved their presents!"

"Except now all of them expect you to come play their new games with them," Embry chuckles. "Charlie, I don't know if you can appreciate just how truly awful your daughter is at video games."

"Hey!" I protest.

"It's okay, Bella, you have other talents," Embry winks.

Charlie clears his throat.

Embry realizes what it sounds like he meant. "Like cooking, and being the smartest person I know, and having an entire generation of Native guys who are waiting to rip my head off if I'm ever mean to you."

I laugh. "That last part is my favorite," I wink.

"What are you looking up there, Bells?" Charlie asks, trying to change the subject. Though he seems mildly cheered at the thought of Embry being kept in line by everyone.

"College research for Embry."

Embry looks at me in question, "It's okay, Dad knows all about me transferring closer to home. He knows how homesick I've been for my friends and family. And for my Daddy," I add, popping up to place a smacking kiss on cheek.

We're not a demonstrative people, but I know how much Charlie appreciates these moments of affection, both verbal and physical.

Charlie hugs me, and clears his throat, "It's a damn fine Christmas present, baby girl."

"Honestly, the only ones complaining are Alex and Victor. But they're ahead of me in school, anyway. And it's not like we're going to lose touch. They're family now."

"Dad, I'm going to let Embry drive my truck home tonight. My present from Jake was a tune-up for the beautiful beast. I figured I could drive with you out to Sue's tomorrow night for Christmas Eve, if that's ok."

"That'll be fine, Bells. I'm going to head up to bed. Don't stay up too late, kids. Embry, tired driving is just as dangerous and drunk driving," Charlie says pointedly.

"Sure thing, Chief!" Embry says.

"Subtle, Dad," I mumble.

"Night!" Charlie says cheerfully as he heads up the stairs.

Embry

I'm sure I'd be wary around guys if I had a pretty daughter. I can't believe Charlie is as chill as he is given the fact that his daughter dated a vamp first. Not that he knew. But still. She was broken. So I get why I'm the enemy.

"I guess I should go," I say, just as Bella leaps on to my lap, straddling me and start kissing.

"What..?"

She holds a finger to her lips and then points up the stairs. "I just want to say a proper goodbye," she whispers, "Since we can't sleep together. Which by the way, is a thing we need to fix as soon as possible. Now, shhh!"

And she spends the next 5 minutes in the most delicious torture ever. Apparently, I like to make noise. But I'm not allowed to. She kisses and licks and presses up against me and then all of a sudden will pop away and say in a voice clearly meant for her Dad to hear, "Oh, look! You might be eligible for this scholarship! You should totally apply!" And then her mouth is back on mine.

Bella

I love the feel of Embry's warm hands. Everywhere he holds me tingles with warmth. Okay. I need to be responsible here.

"I guess you should go home," I sigh. "I wish, oh wish, oh wish, oh wish you could stay!"

We stand and I get him my keys. I'm about to get my coat, but he stops me. "I know you don't like the cold, Bella. Don't come out."

"It's time for me to make new memories in the cold, Embry. And I can't think of anyone better to make them with.

He helps me slip my coat on, and takes my hand in his as we walk outside into the cold, dark, night.