I Will Find You
A Recca no Honoo fic
By Tenshi no Ai
I will NEVER own this series. Really. I don't even dream of owning it.
(A/N: Hm, an overview on one of Fuuko's relationships, and...I guess spoilers for vol. 30.)
I used to have a prince.
I think I did, anyway. He kinda elected himself for the job.
Anyways, it doesn't matter. I'm used to being alone. Even though I hung out with Recca all the time as children, even after Domon latched onto me in the junior high, I've always been alone.
Yanagi's lucky, y'know? She has Recca as her ninja, her protector. All for her and only her.
I used to have someone like that. He called himself my prince, but it was just a lie.
My thoughts shatter and I glare at the person sitting across from me. Then I nearly smack myself when I remember just who is across from me. Yanagi doesn't need my pathetic anger directed at her. Not before and especially not after what we--she--had just gone through. To prove this, she starts tearing up at my less-than-friendly look. Fuuko-chan, I didn't mean to interrupt your thoughts, I...
Nah, just forget it, Yanagi-chan, I sigh, I'm the one who invited you for sweet treats after school anyway. I was just thinking about stuff.
I forgot just how perceptive Yanagi can be, what sort of stuff'? Maybe I can help? she smiles all kindly-like, and I sigh again.
Well, what the hell? After all, the willowy girl in front of me is my best girl friend. There was only one other before her, and that was a long time ago.
Anyway, the only thing to do about it is talk. He's long gone now.
When Recca first declared himself your ninja, how did that make you feel?
Yanagi blinks in surprise, then ducks her head and blushes cutely. My mood lightens up a little. Even after everything that's happened, she still has her innocence about things. Ano...it made me feel...that is...how do I say this...
I groan in frustration. It's not an oral analysis on the Edo court life dialect as opposed to the modern day upper-class society's way of talking, it's just a simple question. You can't possibly tell me that you didn't have some sort of opinion.
She blushes a bit more. I thought it was...weird. What high school teenager just automatically bows at a girl's feet and call her hime'? It was just so...strange to me, she looks up at me and smiles embarrassedly, I mean, school is so much more important right now instead of relationship stuff.
I place the tip of my spoon on my lower lip, I see.
Well, he did approach me, after all. He must've been there for awhile, hovering above me, just listening in on my most important dream.
I've always wanted a prince to ride in on a white horse, bishounen or biseinen depending on my age at the time, with eyes only for me.
Who says that Kirisawa Fuuko can't have that sort of dream?
I have this feeling that someone's staring at me. I refocus my eyes to see Yanagi staring up at me expectantly. Well, Fuuko-chan, who is it? she asks, turquoise eyes dancing merrily. I blush and make like I'm aiming my spoon for another scoop of sundae.
Che, Yanagi-chan, do I look like some love-struck little girlie? Some love-sick fool? Perhaps your Rec~ca-kun even?
She gazes into the clouds of steam emitting from her coffee, pretending that she's concentrating only on that and not on any references to a particular relationship, you look like... she looks up from the whipped cream swirls in her small cup right into my eyes, you look like a girl who's never experienced the idea of liking someone as more than a friend'.
Like I said, Yanagi has a sixth sense for this kind of stuff. She rarely ever shows it, but it's like...she can read the sincerity in a person. Because she's completely, totally right. Recca, Domon, Mi-chan, Kaoru...they're all my friends. You could say that I was chasing after Recca, but that was a misguided thing of pride. I wanted somebody all to myself, he was offering himself to someone. Domon is my best friend, and only that. Mi-chan is a little more complicated, but I'm just trying to get him a little thawed out, so to speak. Kaoru's fun to hang out with, and we make a pretty good team to totally bash Recca.
But could I ever see myself with them?
So, who is it? Once again that girl breaks into my thoughts, and I nearly glare at her again before restraining myself.
Can't you just tune into that info? I snort, bringing up a scoop of ice cream to my mouth.
For a second she looks a little hurt, but then she smiles.
I choke.
Are you okay, Fuuko-chan? She asks with concern over my coughing. I nod and point my spoon at her.
That was completely, 100 percent wrong, I bring the back of the spoon to my lips and lick off some ice cream, savoring the taste of whipped cream and caramel, don't plan on being a fortune teller anytime soon. Or getting swept into other worlds with only your skills in telling other people's fortunes to curry a little favor.
She frowns. I already have enough to deal with concerning my healing ability, then she smiles, is it even someone I know?
I don't know. Has she seen him? I don't think so, so I shake my head. It's silent for a couple of minutes as we finish off our December treats. Ne, Yanagi-chan?
What do you think of your ninja now? It's a stupid question, I know, but I just have to ask. Besides, neither of them have said publicly that they liked each other more than platonically.
He isn't my ninja, she says gravely, or my prince in shining armor, or my savior when all is dark, or anything like that.
I stare at her, stunned.
He is my everything.
I repeat, dumbfounded.
She smiles so innocently that it's like looking at a kid's face just before they learn what kind of world this is. Not even Ganko has that look. Mm-hm! I can't very well say he's just my ninja' because he's my friend as well. I can't say he's my prince', because he doesn't fit into that mold. He is my savior when all is dark, but he's there for me when it's all light in my world too. So he's just everything good all put together, she makes a cupping-together gesture with her hands, like molding a rice ball. It all sticks together perfectly and, she blushes, it looks nice in the end too.
I can't say a single thing to that.
Can I say that I like my prince so much that I would only see his good points and be blind to the bad? Another glance at Yanagi confirms my suspicion, what with the tense lines around her closed eyes. She does see the bad too, Recca's faults do sometimes overshadow anything good he's done, but she chooses to simply remember the good about him.
When I fought my prince, I almost couldn't do a thing. There were so many good memories! He rescued me, invited me to his castle for a look around with him, cheered for me even though I was going against his own. He rescued me when there was no way I could help myself. He trained me to fight without Fuujin, to have a ninja's understanding of the fight, and then he rewarded me with Fuujin's main crystal!
But then he came after me for our fated battle. And he gave it his all, and I tried...I wanted...I almost couldn't.
And then he disappeared.
It was October when I last saw him. It's been over 2 months since I've seen him.
He called himself my prince, and then he said that we had a destiny to fight.
I tiredly glance at my best girl friend's face. Once again, she looks a little troubled.
There's a good and bad to everything, I guess, I shrug nonchalantly, then take one last bite from my sundae and throw the spoon into the glass.
Her face is gentle. Time will only tell. I'm sure that there's another understanding of the situation, and maybe one day soon you'll find it, she delicately sips the last of her coffee and pushes her chair back to stand up, I have to go, Fuuko-chan. Recca needs some tutoring in English fundamentals, Algebra 2, kanji review...
Basically everything but Japanese history, right? I smile, then wave her off, Fine, fine, do what you will with your Recca...but only within the area of tutoring', okay?
she looks a little tortured, then smiles suddenly, tomorrow at school you'll promise to tell me what this was about?
I try my best to smile. Yeah, tomorrow.
She runs out of the coffeehouse, and the bell jingles loudly as she escapes to be with her...destiny, I guess. We all have a destiny, and it seems like a destined partner too.
A different understanding of my situation? Well, the only other understanding would be with him. Would I see him soon? Or has he slunk into the shadows like a true ninja?
No. I'll find him. I'll find him and get my answers. Maybe I'll even figure out just exactly what I feel for him.
I kinda wish I had Yanagi's innocent trust. Then I could say Raiha-kun will surely seek the same closure, so he'll find me and tell me what he feels on the subject.'
But that's not me, is it? That's not Kirisawa Fuuko's way of dealing with the situation.
So...
My prince...
I will find you.
~Owari~
Yeah, my take on the Fuuko/Raiha battle in vol. 30 months after it happened. From what I'm guessing in the manga, the Recca-tachi went to SODOM in late September/early October, because they were all wearing their summer uniforms to school before the 3 Days' chapters, and Kasumi was wearing her uniform during Domon's 3 days (or, the first day of it anyway). And it had to be late September because Kaoru turned 14 before or during SODOM (can't remember the reference right now).
Anyway, I thought that I'd try to write Fuuko for an actual fic, not just short little scenes. The question here is: Did I write Fuuko well enough that it deserves a sequel, or is the story intriguing enough that I should write a sequel? Well, there's a third choice too, but I like my self-esteem. Please feel free to lower it or raise it depending on your opinion!
One last tiny note: To all people waiting for Shiawasena's sequel, well...it's definitely not happening anytime before next year. blushes I know what to write, just not how to write it...and there was another sort of series I wanted to do first...