Invader Zim: Such an Odd Little Child…
Yes. I do. I own something. I own Jen and Tyler. Jen and Tyler are all I own. Not Invader Zim, not Dib, nothing. Just Jen and Tyler.
Hi. I'm Jen. I'd rather not say I was normal. Simply because if I was too normal, I wouldn't have a legacy like mine. It all started the day I transferred to a new skool, with my little brother, Tyler. Tyler and I are what most people consider freaks. I prefer to think of us as modern day societies pirates. We pillage normality, plunder the status quo, and basically just try to make people happy, since no one does that anymore. Tyler and I walked into our new skool, and could see how much work we needed to do here. The walls were a dingy booger-green, and everyone in the hall looked as though they were waiting to be executed.
"Wow, this place looks terrible. My shirt is the brightest thing in this room!" Tyler said. He was right. In a sea of drab grays, a red sweater vest will most likely stand out.
"Yeah, it is. What's the name of your teacher? Mr. El-something, right?" I asked.
"Elliot. It said on the roster he's room 309."
We made our way to room 309 and what we saw inside was not pretty. It was stinky and smelly, and kind of stung my eyes.
"Well hi there! You must be Tyler!" I assumed this blond, bubbly man in his mid thirties was Mr. Elliot. He even smelled like a mothers basement.
"Would you like to introduce yourself, buddy?" I couldn't help but smile a jerky smile. Tyler and I tried to make others happy, but we weren't freakish glowing oddballs. Well, at least not as much as this guy.
"I'm Tyler. That's pretty much the basics."
I decided now was the perfect time to take a silent leave. I slunk out of the classroom unnoticed, and started to head in the general direction of room 329, which was occupied by a Ms. Bitters and her class. If her name was any indication of her personality, I could tell I would have a good time messing with her head. I found the correct room, and saw one who I could only guess was Bitters. She was VERY old, and had a large hunch in her back. She looked a bit like a giant eel in her black outfit.
"You must be…" She looked down at a sheet of paper on her desk. "…Jen?"
"Yes Ma'am." I couldn't hide my Texan accent.
"Fine then. Speak now or forever hold your peace, because once you sit down, I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANOTHER PEEP OUT OF YOU!"
Geez, she's definitely a friendly chick.
"I'm Jen. Hi, I guess…." I couldn't concentrate on anything I was trying to say, because sitting in the front row of the classroom was a boy with green skin and no ears.
"Uhh…. I'm Jen and.… I'm sorry, what the heck is up with the green kid?" I couldn't stop myself. Granted, he could be from a very small country in Asia that no ones ever heard of, but that struck me as a very small possibility.
"SILENCE! I AM NORMAL! Its a skin condition." The green-headed kid said.
"You don't have ears. How can a SKIN condition affect your ears?" For a second, I thought I saw a kid with black spiky hair next to the window giggling.
"Uhhh…. It umm… IT JUST DOES! SILENCE!"
"Take your seat now, Jen." Ms. Bitters said. "Take the seat… Behind Zita." She pressed a large red button and in a flash, the boy sitting behind 'Zita' was gone. Hopefully, he wasn't in some sort of dungeon. Though, with Ms. Bitters as a teacher, that wouldn't fail to surprise me.
"Now, class. Today we are learning about…."
I tuned Ms. Bitters out. I could hear her talking about the Calvin Cycle (which I practically memorized after reading my moms old textbooks. Don't ask.). I was thinking about how I'm going to survive in a hole like this with that nut job with a 'skin condition'. I mean, how could no one notice that he looks like something off the sci-fi channel?
"-And that is why we are all doomed for eternity. Now, FINISH YOUR TEST PAPERS!" Somehow, Ms. Bitters had gone from the Calvin Cycle to eternal damnation. I could tell I was going to have a lot of fun here….